TailSpin75 Posted February 27, 2013 Share Posted February 27, 2013 An original I wrote for her... This life I've been given and the life that I lost; A choice that she made Which comes at my cost. She is worse than the devil With her selfserving lies; Worked her plan to perfection My destruction her prize. Compassion and guilt Are only masks that she wears; She speaks with a forked tongue and does not care. Myself or our children For us could not stay; Our family - no value We only stood in her way. I damn her and curse her that blood sucking leech; May happiness forever be in sight but never within reach... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Darren Steez Posted February 27, 2013 Share Posted February 27, 2013 You've given alot of people alot of good advice. People seeking reasons to why their spouses/partners hurt them. It's membership to a club nobody wants to join and it sucks. I wish I had this forum to come and vent when I was going through my sh*t(s), hope things are a little better today. Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted February 27, 2013 Share Posted February 27, 2013 An original I wrote for her... This life I've been given and the life that I lost; A choice that she made Which comes at my cost. She is worse than the devil With her selfserving lies; Worked her plan to perfection My destruction her prize. Compassion and guilt Are only masks that she wears; She speaks with a forked tongue and does not care. Myself or our children For us could not stay; Our family - no value We only stood in her way. I damn her and curse her that blood sucking leech; May happiness forever be in sight but never within reach... Am I correct? Does this poem spew anger? Link to post Share on other sites
TailSpin75 Posted February 27, 2013 Share Posted February 27, 2013 Hi Yas... it does vent the anger. The Jekyll/Hyde theory. We pine for Jekyll - the one we loved and who loved us. It was Hyde that broke our hearts and put us in hell. Jekyll for us, has been gone... it's always Hyde - but so hard to see in the memory. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted February 27, 2013 Share Posted February 27, 2013 Am, One of the biggest things people have a hard time with is accepting that this all takes time, it doesn't just shut off. You are far from the hopeless cause you paint yourself to be, but you most certainly will stay stuck there for as long as that is what you choose to believe. It's not all going to be better tomorrow, but if tomorrow can be a little bit easier then today was, then that's a victory and then you move on to the next...... TOJAZ 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 I wish it was just as a simple thing as feeling `sorry for myself` None of you know whats going on in my head at any given time. It`s hard for me to even understand it or even put it into words most of the time i fek it up and i end up saying things that always `come out wrong` I have a hard time getting across what i really mean to say. I KNOW what i want to say and in which way, but it always gets contrived in some way( hence my infractions...(or maybe they can be an example)) i don`t have one nasty bone in my body, i wish no harm to anyone I`ve been `battling` all my life Against what? Well as i get older i can see that its not me. I`m not battling myself. I`m not welling in self pity, i don`t need or WANT... ANYONE to feel sorry for me My trouble has always been that i`m TOO honest I`ve been told that i lack tactfulness, consideration/diplomacy. least i`m honest Anyway an update She STILL hasn`t text me to arrange when i can get my money that she owes me back so i just text her and asked for it i didn`t want to, she left me no choice??? Part of me is thinking to just forget about it and let her have it? Thank you all for replying to me means a lot to me aM Link to post Share on other sites
Jstub Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 Why would you let her have it? Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 Why would you let her have it? Well after i paid of most of her debts..(18K plus) going after £80 seems to me more hassle than its worth? the 80 was after we split up thou i helped her out yeah i know.....AGAIN! thats what i`m asking shall i just `write it off`? aM Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 If you can afford to, let her have, write it off, don't think about anymore, forget it and strive to be happy. Yas Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 If you can afford to, let her have, write it off, don't think about anymore, forget it and strive to be happy. Yas no i cant afford it i need it i have text her tonight asking for it, i have phoned her 3 times, just for it to ring and ring and ring..... and then go to answerphone so yas? what should i do? stick to what i believe in or just lay back and let her win by ME giving in? aM Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 If you can afford to, let her have, write it off, don't think about anymore, forget it and strive to be happy. Yas your right. i should just right it off been waiting for this for 3 weeks now and now it`s here i`m not even surprised that she hasn`t texted:mad:...< ignore that emoticons `confuse` posters .... so i`ve been `advised!!!` will exclamation marks be censored next??? sooner or later i wont be able to say ANYTHING on here without offending SOMEONE!!! What THE hell CAN i say???? Can i SAY ANYTHING ON HERE ANYMORE????? aM Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 no i cant afford it i need it i have text her tonight asking for it, i have phoned her 3 times, just for it to ring and ring and ring..... and then go to answerphone so yas? what should i do? stick to what i believe in or just lay back and let her win by ME giving in? aM I think you should allow yourself to win by "letting" her keep the dough, and "giving" yourself freedom from acting in the role a bill collector with a significant other. If indeed you could not afford it - then you must face you made a mistake in loaning it in the first place. Of course, you have learned from the experience to not loan money to this person again. Here is a solution. You have to cut costs. I am cutting costs myself - I will give you some examples. I got the electric bill down from $169 to $77, by turning down the fridge, not burning the outside lights at night, turning down the water heater, etc. My gas for heat was only $45 - because I didn't run the heat hardly - and it has been in the 30's sometimes. I've been burning wood out of the yard. I really cut back on food - and started eating some really cheap stuff. I only went to the store one time in February - and I'm still stretching it. Next month I'm gonna get dried beans to cook up and freeze, and make some soups. This is the biggest expense I cut of all. I dropped the ciggarettes and the wine, period - no more. And I have expensive taste in both. One whole month. Can you believe it? Now, since you leant money you didn't have, you gotta eat beans for awhile, and do 50 sit-ups. You get me? Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 I think you should allow yourself to win by "letting" her keep the dough, and "giving" yourself freedom from acting in the role a bill collector with a significant other. If indeed you could not afford it - then you must face you made a mistake in loaning it in the first place. Of course, you have learned from the experience to not loan money to this person again. Here is a solution. You have to cut costs. I am cutting costs myself - I will give you some examples. I got the electric bill down from $169 to $77, by turning down the fridge, not burning the outside lights at night, turning down the water heater, etc. My gas for heat was only $45 - because I didn't run the heat hardly - and it has been in the 30's sometimes. I've been burning wood out of the yard. I really cut back on food - and started eating some really cheap stuff. I only went to the store one time in February - and I'm still stretching it. Next month I'm gonna get dried beans to cook up and freeze, and make some soups. This is the biggest expense I cut of all. I dropped the ciggarettes and the wine, period - no more. And I have expensive taste in both. One whole month. Can you believe it? Now, since you leant money you didn't have, you gotta eat beans for awhile, and do 50 sit-ups. You get me? no i don`t she owes me i`m ignoring the rest she `owes` me but this i cant seem too it was after we were REALLY through aM Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 ok. i see what your`re saying aM Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 i should let it go? aM Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 ok. i see what your`re saying aM Either way, you screwed out of the money. Just determine what opinion you wanna have of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 Either way, you screwed out of the money. Just determine what opinion you wanna have of it. i didnt lend beans i didn`t have i put ALL my beans in what i did have am Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 ok. i see what your`re saying aM Either way, you screwed out of the money. Just determine what opinion you wanna have of it. And whether or not you want agravation, or to do without some stuff as your lesson. You sound better. Good. Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 Either way, you screwed out of the money. Just determine what opinion you wanna have of it. yas what do you think i should do? keep chasing it or let it go? aM Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 yas what do you think i should do? keep chasing it or let it go? aM I think you should try not to lend money to people who don't pay you back. Also, I think you can do WITHOUT being a bill collector, it is too much stress when you trying to get a person you love to pony up the dough. Money often c ormplicates ruins relationships. Finially, I think you should just chalk it up to a loss, do without some stuff (like suggrstions I gave you), untill you make up for the loss. The greatest part of eating it is that the next time she wants money - IT WILL BE VERY EASY TO SAY NO. Cause she didn't pay back the last loan. So sorry for her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 I think you should allow yourself to win by "letting" her keep the dough, and "giving" yourself freedom from acting in the role a bill collector with a significant other. If indeed you could not afford it - then you must face you made a mistake in loaning it in the first place. Of course, you have learned from the experience to not loan money to this person again. Here is a solution. You have to cut costs. I am cutting costs myself - I will give you some examples. I got the electric bill down from $169 to $77, by turning down the fridge, not burning the outside lights at night, turning down the water heater, etc. My gas for heat was only $45 - because I didn't run the heat hardly - and it has been in the 30's sometimes. I've been burning wood out of the yard. I really cut back on food - and started eating some really cheap stuff. I only went to the store one time in February - and I'm still stretching it. Next month I'm gonna get dried beans to cook up and freeze, and make some soups. This is the biggest expense I cut of all. I dropped the ciggarettes and the wine, period - no more. And I have expensive taste in both. One whole month. Can you believe it? Now, since you leant money you didn't have, you gotta eat beans for awhile, and do 50 sit-ups. You get me? .0 yeah i get you your right i`ll let it go aM 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 (edited) I think you should try not to lend money to people who don't pay you back. Also, I think you can do WITHOUT being a bill collector, it is too much stress when you trying to get a person you love to pony up the dough. Money often c ormplicates ruins relationships. Finially, I think you should just chalk it up to a loss, do without some stuff (like suggrstions I gave you), untill you make up for the loss. The greatest part of eating it is that the next time she wants money - IT WILL BE VERY EASY TO SAY NO. Cause she didn't pay back the last loan. So sorry for her. your right it was my fault the flags were right in my face i`m going to wright it off still hurts thou you know? aM Edited March 1, 2013 by aMguilts Link to post Share on other sites
Yasuandio Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 your right it was my fault the flags were right in my face i`m going to right it off still hurts thou you know? aM Well, sometimes the lesson learned from mistakes are painful. But look at the bright side - you don't have to feel obligated to give out anymore loans! Yas Link to post Share on other sites
Author aMguilts Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 Well, sometimes the lesson learned from mistakes are painful. But look at the bright side - you don't have to feel obligated to give out anymore loans! Yas i know its still not over for me thou aM Link to post Share on other sites
tojaz Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 or just lay back and let her win by ME giving in? AM, if it's become about who wins or loses, then you both have already lost. Write it off, consider it an £80 investment towards stress reduction. getting sh it in pm now too and i dont know how to reply pm has never worked for me aM If people are giving you trouble via PM, there is an ignore option on a per user basis, no need to reply. TOJAZ Link to post Share on other sites
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