AmeliePoulain Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 (edited) I had Facebook for a long time (for 9 years) but got rid of exactly a year ago today. I don't care to go back on it. I found it a bad habit always logging in and seeing what everyone was up to. My bf (he's 28, I'm 27) has a Facebook and once in awhile I look at his main picture (his is private so you can only see the profile picture). He doesn't know I look at it time to time, but there really isn't anything to see since I can't view any other information. I actually like that I can't view his profile. I know that he is not listed as in a relationship because he told me since the beginning. It doesn't say "in a relationship" or "single". He said that if I wanted him to change it, that he would, but I told him it wasn't an issue as I'm not even on it. He just doesn't have a relationship status at all on it which is not a problem. He also said that in the beginning, he posted a picture of us at a bar together and people commented on it with nice things; however, he recently posted a picture of him from when he played flag football on Sunday. This is the first time in 8 months that I've seen him change his profile pic. It's just a pic of him sitting on a bench looking away. Now, I'm just drinking wine at home lol and I'm wondering why he has not ever put a picture of us together as his profile pic. We've taken many photos, so why did he change it to this one by himself sitting on a bench? I know, I know, not a huge deal, but I guess because I already know I don't like Facebook, and knowing he doesn't post other photos of us (except that one early on in the relationship) I start to wonder if he talks to other girls on there or wonder why he doesn't put a photo of us. He said he only talks to two girls (one is a lesbian in another state, and this other girl I met that is an ex of his friend's - this doesn't bother me). In fact, I realize now that this is just a semi-drunken, insecurity rant that I decided to post. Would this bother you guys? He doesn't go on Facebook when we are together which is awesome, but I know that from what his friend's commented once is that he's always on it (while he's at work). Honestly, I think it's kind of a turnoff knowing he's on Facebook all the time but I know how popular it is as I was once on it. Edited February 28, 2013 by AmeliePoulain Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Now, I'm just drinking wine at home lol and I'm wondering why he has not ever put a picture of us together as his profile pic. Because he isn't 16? Because it's HIS Facebook profile, not yours as a couple? Because the two of you aren't married? I think you should put down the wine and stop worrying about silly things. Link to post Share on other sites
Keenly Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Women get upset over the STUPIDEST things when it comes to facebook. Stop looking at his profile, its almost like you are just looking for holes to poke in your relationship. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 The pic wouldn't worry me as much as him ONLY using it away from you. I use FB, my OH doesn't. He knows I love it and it would be weird for me never to pop on it when he's around unless a) I'm hiding something, or b) I'm scared of him giving me a 'ticking off'. Do either of those apply in your case? Link to post Share on other sites
Author AmeliePoulain Posted February 28, 2013 Author Share Posted February 28, 2013 lol now it's the morning - I do remember a half hour after I wrote this I did feel stupid. I guess I just thought it would be awesome if he had a pic of us on there together or might want to show more he's a in relationship. But then I thought, all his friends/family know about me so there's nothing to hide. As for the FB when I'm not around, he knows I'd rather him not be on the computer when we spend time together. He's shown me a few things on his Facebook but I've never seen his actual profile or photos. I'm sure if anyone went around looking for things then they might find something, but I don't think he's hiding anything. He leaves his e-mail up on his screen sometimes when I walk into his room but I don't look at his inbox. Anyway, it wasn't anything I planned to say anything to him about, I just thought if anyone else might be disappointed if there wasn't a pic of them together besides the 1 that was put up early on. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 I have a male friend who has been seeing a woman for 2 years or so and his relationship status hasn't changed, nor has he put up any pictures of them as a couple. And she's on his friends list. Look, this is not important in the gist of things. Don't base what you two have on facebook and his status, what he does or doesn't do on fb. If you let it, it WILL ruin things between you. Some people these days rely TOO MUCH on texts and online stuff to communicate with one another. Hello, pick up the phone and talk/hear voice! He may be one who only uses fb once in a while and he may not want to advertise his personal life on there. Link to post Share on other sites
Krytie TV Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 If it helps I am absolutely and completely loyal to my wife and I have never hap a picture of her on my fb account. Granted my activity level is low, but there we are. In a close relationship, there is so little that is not shared. It's nice to have your own identity sometimes. Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 He may be one who only uses fb once in a while and he may not want to advertise his personal life on there. That's the bit that I found out. He's really into it but never does Facebook in the OP's presence. That seems unusual. Link to post Share on other sites
azara Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 Women get upset over the STUPIDEST things once it involves facebook. Stop observing his profile, its virtually such as you square measure simply yearning for holes to poke in your relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 That's the bit that I found out. He's really into it but never does Facebook in the OP's presence. That seems unusual. If they are dating and not living together, I don't find it odd that he doesn't go on facebook during their presence. If I am hanging out with my husband, or a friend, or a family member, I don't go on the computer at all. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 I re-read your opening post again. You should too, and ask yourself why you don't trust him. There has to be more going on here. So you are just bothered that he spends a lot of time on FB while at work, yet you yourself admitted to quitting fb because it's addictive and you spent too much time on it yourself. He did post a picture of you two as a couple a long time ago..Yet you want him to post another one. He has his relationship status unset, yet he DID tell you he'd change it for you if you'd like. What he does on his own time when he's not with you, shouldn't be a big deal. So if he talks to another woman friend on fb it upsets you? Has he given you any real reason to doubt him? This really seems to be your own issue unless he's cheated on you in the past or acted totally inappropriately with another woman and you found out about it. Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 If they are dating and not living together, I don't find it odd that he doesn't go on facebook during their presence. If I am hanging out with my husband, or a friend, or a family member, I don't go on the computer at all. My friends and I might, depending on how many hours, or what environment we're in. Phone/Internet usage/etiquette varies so much. Link to post Share on other sites
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