LFH Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 (edited) I was thinking today about how sometimes affairs lead us to places of sheer ridiculousness, and you know that if you saw it on tv or in a movie, you'd be like NO ONE is going to believe that just happened!!! and yet in reality, it just did. He spent last week with me while I was out of commission and basically dropped everything with less than an hour notice to come be with me. The excuse he used to do it was so flimsy when he told me. I seriously don't know how he pulled it off. What was the most ridiculous excuse that your MM/MW has ever told to be with you (that you know of)? I'm looking for responses from (f)OW/OM and WS's. Edited February 28, 2013 by LFH Link to post Share on other sites
Mount Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 I am not surprised, why should I. Two weeks ago we had the biggest storm here, everything in the city was almost shut down, including working office. But since I asked him, he told his wife he had to work even under such weather. Because driving was not possible under that sever weather, he asked his wife sending him to subway, then he went from there to my place. I was thinking today about how sometimes affairs lead us to places of sheer ridiculousness, and you know that if you saw it on tv or in a movie, you'd be like NO ONE is going to believe that just happened!!! and yet in reality, it just did. He spent last week with me while I was out of commission and basically dropped everything with less than an hour notice to come be with me. The excuse he used to do it was so flimsy when he told me. I seriously don't know how he pulled it off. What was the most ridiculous excuse that your MM/MW has ever told to be with you (that you know of)? I'm looking for responses from (f)OW/OM and WS's. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 He didn't really have to do that, as he didn't live with her. Our meet ups were more scheduled because we lived in different countries. But to be honest, I never asked and he never volunteered to tell me any of his excuses/lies/tales. I think I had the mentality, which he supported, that he was the one taken so whatever he had to do, he would do it but I didn't need to be implicated in it. So if I needed or wanted him to do something, how exactly he made it happen, I have no idea...but he did (sometimes). Link to post Share on other sites
skylarblue Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 xMM didn't really tell her any ridiculous lies, just lots of lies in general. It was more shocking to me than anything - how easily he told them to her, how proud he seemed to get them over on her, and how deep/plentiful they were. The most ridiculous thing I found about his lies was how she so easily accepted them. Link to post Share on other sites
Mount Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 LFH - did we all misunderstand your question? What did you really try to vent about? I was thinking today about how sometimes affairs lead us to places of sheer ridiculousness, and you know that if you saw it on tv or in a movie, you'd be like NO ONE is going to believe that just happened!!! and yet in reality, it just did. He spent last week with me while I was out of commission and basically dropped everything with less than an hour notice to come be with me. The excuse he used to do it was so flimsy when he told me. I seriously don't know how he pulled it off. What was the most ridiculous excuse that your MM/MW has ever told to be with you (that you know of)? I'm looking for responses from (f)OW/OM and WS's. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LFH Posted February 28, 2013 Author Share Posted February 28, 2013 LFH - did we all misunderstand your question? What did you really try to vent about? I'm not venting about anything. I asked a question I was curious about. I figured I couldn't be the only one to find some of this just ridiculous. I just often find some of the scenarios/etc that I read/hear about to be so farfetched that they're ridiculous. I find lying very difficult as well as being wrong. Some of the stories I've heard posted have been really elaborate and some have been just so flimsy. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 xMM didn't really tell her any ridiculous lies, just lots of lies in general. It was more shocking to me than anything - how easily he told them to her, how proud he seemed to get them over on her, and how deep/plentiful they were. The most ridiculous thing I found about his lies was how she so easily accepted them. I think that's how I kept my sanity. I don't know how much he had to lie...probably a lot less than someone who lives with their SO. But I'm sure if I had to witness what he actually had to do and say and lie about I would be extremely turned off. For me, it was ignorance to his lies to her and the fact he didn't talk about their relationship, which allowed me to carry on the situation. I would have a very hard time respecting him if he came to me proud of himself at his deep and plentiful lies. I remember once while we were together he had to use my cell phone to call her. He didn't say it was her. But he excused himself and so I knew...and I could kind of hear his conversation. I didn't hear it all and he didn't say any outright lies that I could hear but that was one of the only times I "witnessed" the behind-the-scenes of how he made the A possible...and it was upsetting to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Tenacity Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 Hi LFH... good question, although I'm late on it (as usual). I used to wonder that myself, many many MANY times. Although unless I asked (I usually didn't), I wasn't privy to the details of what he told her. Here I'm referring to the later stage of my A (after the years when we were both single and after it was clear he was staying with his W). We were long-distance much of the time then, so it was compounded by a similar situation which you state - that he had to make excuses for a period of several days every few weeks or so. Honestly? I think it didn't matter to her what he said. She accepted it. I don't know the details in your situation but I wonder if some of that is true also, based on some of what you have said. One time when we had a six-day hotel stay already paid for, his W called and wanted him home on the fifth day. He didn't want to go, but he told her yes, and then he told me this. I told him to do what he wanted and I made arrangements to leave. I packed and called a cab to the airport. He stopped me before I took the flight, and told her no. Stupid, but I won that battle. But not the war. Although ultimately, as it turned out, as far as I'm concerned, she lost on all accounts by still having him. I sure wish you better luck than I had. You have a different relationship than most here have, and although that is hard to accept for some, it is the truth at least for now. You have earned my respect from the intelligence from your many posts, even if I don't always agree. After all, none of us can know what it is like to walk in the shoes of another. What I really respect is people who have a heart and who are compassionate to others, and I think it's worth sticking up for. (And this is why about every third post I make gets me moderated here). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Catplates Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 He said he was possum hunting. It was ridiculous because they are nocturnal animals, and are notoriously hard to catch , even with a cage. He did a lot of hunting during the morning, afternoon and evening. At least that's what he told me his excuse was. He was a crack shot with a rifle, so maybe credible in a small way. Cat. Link to post Share on other sites
stevie_23 Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 Mine didn't really have to lie much. He more just avoided and hid and "dodged" in order to text and chat with me sometimes. We usually only had contact when his wife was at work, so... But some things he has told her during our time were... - He had to go into the office on some weekend mornings (when he really didn't have to at all and never had done this before). He did this so we could chat because we couldn't do it safely if he was at home because his wife was there - He actually DID pay $10,000 to the landlord of his office (it was a construction company left to his wife by her crazy ex-husband and my ex-MM managed it / ran it) to keep the office for another 3 months so he could continue to easily be with me. He knew once he lost the office, it'd be harder for us, with him being at home all the time and having nowhere to go. His wife didn't want to prolong the inevitable bankruptcy for the company but he said he wanted to try one more time to make some good money (which he did, admittedly, to try to get enough to give her financial stability for a while after he left, and to get some money for him too to enable him to move out) so he wanted to keep it there for a bit longer. - In the mornings for a while, when he no longer had the office, when his wife got up, he'd already be showered and ready to go, and he'd leave and drive to a 7-Eleven and park there, so we could continue texting. He told her he had a job to go to (he was doing freelance landscaping at this point, and sometimes he DID have jobs to go to, but usually not that early and not every day). Link to post Share on other sites
stevie_23 Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 He said he was possum hunting. It was ridiculous because they are nocturnal animals, and are notoriously hard to catch , even with a cage. He did a lot of hunting during the morning, afternoon and evening. At least that's what he told me his excuse was. He was a crack shot with a rifle, so maybe credible in a small way. Cat. HAHA! Possum hunting!?! lol Link to post Share on other sites
waterwoman Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 LOL at possum hunting Perfect..... Link to post Share on other sites
cocorico Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 I was thinking today about how sometimes affairs lead us to places of sheer ridiculousness, and you know that if you saw it on tv or in a movie, you'd be like NO ONE is going to believe that just happened!!! and yet in reality, it just did. He spent last week with me while I was out of commission and basically dropped everything with less than an hour notice to come be with me. The excuse he used to do it was so flimsy when he told me. I seriously don't know how he pulled it off. What was the most ridiculous excuse that your MM/MW has ever told to be with you (that you know of)? I'm looking for responses from (f)OW/OM and WS's. He never needed excuses or lies. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 He rarely needed any excuse because his presence wasn't noticed or desired, but I do recall he was unexpectedly late back one time and he blamed a golf club lost at dusk and that he had paced back over the course slowly. Which, as I type, I realise isn't that unbelievable as we did that ourselves together, and it's happened to me too, and he was ridiculously protective over his clubs. So not so preposterous after all! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 I hope you don't mind me posting LFH.. Reading the excuses, to me means, that each MM is very capable of telling some pretty good whopping lies to make sure their spouse don't doubt them. It takes a skilled liar to pull something like that off. So why would a wife or husband suspect or even worry about if their spouse is lying. Most probably would take them at their word..And why not since they are married. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LFH Posted March 1, 2013 Author Share Posted March 1, 2013 I hope you don't mind me posting LFH.. Reading the excuses, to me means, that each MM is very capable of telling some pretty good whopping lies to make sure their spouse don't doubt them. It takes a skilled liar to pull something like that off. So why would a wife or husband suspect or even worry about if their spouse is lying. Most probably would take them at their word..And why not since they are married. I just responded elsewhere about this, that's the thing. He's NOT good at it. His excuses are lame, his stories full of holes, and he might as well be wearing a neon sign that says "I'm LYING!!!!" when he does. I guess maybe it does just come back to really no longer seeing the person after a while and if you aren't seeing/hearing them then I guess it just wouldn't be noticed. Link to post Share on other sites
jwi71 Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 I think it could be: 1) An indication of deep trust the BS has in the WS 2) The lie told to the BS is in fact a lie told to the AP (or maybe an exaggeration) 3) The BS doesn't care if the WS strays so the lies would never really matter anyway. 4) The BS is truly gullible - lets face it, there are some stupid people out there. I think all the lies fall under one of those four. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
jwi71 Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 5) The BS prefers to look the other way as long as the WS stays with her. She may well be afraid to rock the boat. I'd say this falls under 4 Just to quibble...buwahahahaha! Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 I'd say this falls under 4 Just to quibble...buwahahahaha! It's not the same though, is it? Some people don't see, others actively look away. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 5) The BS prefers to look the other way as long as the WS stays with her. She may well be afraid to rock the boat. With that said, the WS chooses to stay married as well, continuing to have his cake and eat it too, having two women all for himself. The OW chooses to believe his lies as well. The real winner in this is always the MM/MW as they get the best of both worlds. Bolded part. Or she just doesn't care, maybe she has an OM on the side and is having an affair as well. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LFH Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 Subtle nudge to everyone, let's please return this to the actual topic instead of all these veiled snipes... Link to post Share on other sites
Author LFH Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 When you all are done patting yourselves on the back, take a moment to reflect on the sinkhole of crap your lives will be mired in years down the road when, in your senility, you try to remember the good you've done in your lives and can only remember how well you've screwed everyone around you... intentionally or unintentionally. Aaaaaaannnnnd.. your point is....What exactly? I'd recommend that you read the TOS for the site before your lack of civility and respect gets you moderated and or banned. Link to post Share on other sites
Tenacity Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Maybe it's habit or laziness? I mean, why lie at all if you are going to lie badly? He must think that it just doesn't matter, or why bother? I don't know. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LFH Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 Maybe it's habit or laziness? I mean, why lie at all if you are going to lie badly? He must think that it just doesn't matter, or why bother? I don't know. I think the concept was getting lost in the thread. It isn't why is he lying, I know WHY, he lies when he has to so that he can be with me. Most of the time he doesn't have to, but when he does he's really bad at it and some of it seems really ridiculous. Maybe others are better at it than he is... although I did find the possum hunting story funny. It's stuff like that that I think "Did that REALLY just get said?!!? How is that even a real thing?" Link to post Share on other sites
beenburned Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 LFH, I know you are in a long term affair and happy with it. I admire your honesty about this. However, when I read your thread, it seemed to imply that his wife must be very stupid to believe the lies he makes up in order to spend time with you. It almost sounded like you were bragging about all of the disrespect he is showing his wife. I know you have said repeatedly that his wife doesn't care what he does. Then why does he have to create such ridiculous lies to tell her? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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