My MM is having a baby!

[LFH]

She has a great family , her sisters have been trying to get her away from me for a long time and are right in doing so.

 

I'm glad. I hope her sisters are close by and will help her through this. If you really mean what you say, that you are sorry and you want to let her heal, please do it. Don't worry about your ego or how you might be spoken poorly of, but focus on what it is she needs you to do, and if that means never coming here again, I hope you consider doing exactly that.

 

I mean it, this isn't something "fixable"

Seven years is a very long time, and I don't know her, but I do know if it were me right about now my heart would be shattered. Please let her grieve. Please do whatever it is she needs to make it easier for her.

 

Do you plan to tell your wife? I'm not going to encourage you to do so one way or the other, but I am curious.

[ToxicLover43]

You promised to leave her alone, but yet you come here and post with an attempt to do nothing more than defend yourself?

 

Exactly how was that supposed to help tainted and how is that keeping your promise to leave her alone?

 

Sunny is right........it's manipulation and you can't keep promises, can you?

 

I'm not defending anything

 

My post directly relates to the phone Convo we had. We both felt that the some of the replys are so over the top and generic simply because its a case of a MM cheapting

 

No one understand what we really have between us

 

Plain and simple

 

 

Everyone on this forum assumes who and what i am based on a paragraph from tainted.

[ToxicLover43]

Nope - we are basing it on the evidence presented.

 

You cheat. You lie. And then you have a child coming with someone you say you don't love enough.

 

Yet YOU CHOOSE to stay married.

 

What part did we get wrong?

 

Did you google "cheating MM" to come up with that description

 

 

Wait, let me stop talking before I manipulate u

[LadyGrey]

Nothing you said was all that unique or special or different. We don't have to know you to see a lot of similar characteristics that you being a mm have with other mm who cheat.

 

I'm sure you'd like to think you are special, but truth be told I think it's pretty damn ****ty for anyone to do what you've done, to both of these women and I won't even get into the part about you not loving your wife but having a baby with her cause it makes me want to puke. Your version of doing what you think is best..........is very twisted. It WILL bite you in the arse someday and sadly innocent people are going to suffer for it. Tainted has suffered and it's going to get worse for a while. What she described as your relationship is very dysfunctional. What you've done to both these women is not love!

 

 

 

 

 

I'm not defending anything

 

My post directly relates to the phone Convo we had. We both felt that the some of the replys are so over the top and generic simply because its a case of a MM cheapting

 

No one understand what we really have between us

 

Plain and simple

 

 

Everyone on this forum assumes who and what i am based on a paragraph from tainted.

[ToxicLover43]

Nothing you said was all that unique or special or different. We don't have to know you to see a lot of similar characteristics that you being a mm have with other mm who cheat.

 

I'm sure you'd like to think you are special, but truth be told I think it's pretty damn ****ty for anyone to do what you've done, to both of these women and I won't even get into the part about you not loving your wife but having a baby with her cause it makes me want to puke. Your version of doing what you think is best..........is very twisted. It WILL bite you in the arse someday and sadly innocent people are going to suffer for it. Tainted has suffered and it's going to get worse for a while. What she described as your relationship is very dysfunctional. What you've done to both these women is not love!

 

Your entitled to your opinion.

[TaintedLuv]

I see but there's just too much for me to respond to right now. I'm sick to my stomach reading my MMs reiterate this story and it doesn't get any easier.

 

I created this thread for feedback and to prove a point to MM that when I say he truly doesn't mean the things to tells me that I'm right in believing so. Everyone here confirms my feelings. He couldn't handle reading past page one then couldn't help himself and read on.

 

Anyway Toxic, u keep saying u want me to be happy and I don't need u but that's a bunch of bs. Sorry. U only care about her happiness. Thanks for taking everything then wishing me well on Ur way to a new chapter of Ur life.

[LFH]

I'm not defending anything

 

My post directly relates to the phone Convo we had. We both felt that the some of the replys are so over the top and generic simply because its a case of a MM cheapting

 

No one understand what we really have between us

 

Plain and simple

 

 

Everyone on this forum assumes who and what i am based on a paragraph from tainted.

 

No one can understand what you have BECAUSE it is between the two of you.

 

You broke her heart, don't you want SOMEONE to be on her side? In order for her to get over you, it's not going to be able to be you.

I do understand the frustrating of being lumped in with all the other stories. It's hard because you know all the details we don't

But in order to be supportive of her, we can't be saying, well I'm sure he's a nice guy who made some bad choices, but hey, no harm no foul!

The decision to be with you still is in HER hands. I hope she decides not be, because the heartbreak in her words made ME want to cry, but if she does, I'll hold her hand while she watches you go from a MM to a family in front of her face.

 

I am trusting you're sincere, but you literally just knocked up your wife while claiming to be in love with Tainted. It's not a rosy picture. I'm sure you didn't MEAN to hurt anyone, but that's how these things work. You are the one that for the last 7 years has gotten to have both a wife, and a girlfriend. I think you might remind me a little bit of Alex actually so I'm going to continue talking to you the way I'd talk to him. I feel bad for your girlfriend, I feel bad for your wife. I feel bad for how lost you probably feel right now.

 

If you love her the way you say you do, right about now you have to feel like you are losing your world. Hell of a risk for something you said you didn't want. I'm going to ask you, are you SURE your marriage is what you want? If not, now's the time (well actually a couple months ago might ahve been better) to make that final decision. I asked if you plan to tell your wife, my guess is no right?

If you do want to stay married, then now you really should make the decision to stop seeing your girlfriend. You owe it to your wife to try and sincerely make it work or not, and you owe it to Tainted to protect her from the additional pain of having to watch you enlarge the world you keep her out of.

 

A lot could be said about protecting your wife, and everything else, but I think you already know that and I'm sure others will wake up shortly and tell you that part. I spoke from the part I can speak best about.

 

If you love someone you are supposed to take care of them, protect them, cherish them. If you can't, or won't... then she needs to be able to find someone who will.

 

Tainted, please don't hesitate to PM me if you ever need to talk. I hope you are doing ok, and that you have shoulders to lean on.

 

Toxic, good luck, you're gonna need it. Your world is going to be quiet messy for quite some time.

[ToxicLover43]

No one can understand what you have BECAUSE it is between the two of you.

 

You broke her heart, don't you want SOMEONE to be on her side? In order for her to get over you, it's not going to be able to be you.

I do understand the frustrating of being lumped in with all the other stories. It's hard because you know all the details we don't

But in order to be supportive of her, we can't be saying, well I'm sure he's a nice guy who made some bad choices, but hey, no harm no foul!

The decision to be with you still is in HER hands. I hope she decides not be, because the heartbreak in her words made ME want to cry, but if she does, I'll hold her hand while she watches you go from a MM to a family in front of her face.

 

I am trusting you're sincere, but you literally just knocked up your wife while claiming to be in love with Tainted. It's not a rosy picture. I'm sure you didn't MEAN to hurt anyone, but that's how these things work. You are the one that for the last 7 years has gotten to have both a wife, and a girlfriend. I think you might remind me a little bit of Alex actually so I'm going to continue talking to you the way I'd talk to him. I feel bad for your girlfriend, I feel bad for your wife. I feel bad for how lost you probably feel right now.

 

If you love her the way you say you do, right about now you have to feel like you are losing your world. Hell of a risk for something you said you didn't want. I'm going to ask you, are you SURE your marriage is what you want? If not, now's the time (well actually a couple months ago might ahve been better) to make that final decision. I asked if you plan to tell your wife, my guess is no right?

If you do want to stay married, then now you really should make the decision to stop seeing your girlfriend. You owe it to your wife to try and sincerely make it work or not, and you owe it to Tainted to protect her from the additional pain of having to watch you enlarge the world you keep her out of.

 

A lot could be said about protecting your wife, and everything else, but I think you already know that and I'm sure others will wake up shortly and tell you that part. I spoke from the part I can speak best about.

 

If you love someone you are supposed to take care of them, protect them, cherish them. If you can't, or won't... then she needs to be able to find someone who will.

 

Tainted, please don't hesitate to PM me if you ever need to talk. I hope you are doing ok, and that you have shoulders to lean on.

 

Toxic, good luck, you're gonna need it. Your world is going to be quiet messy for quite some time.

 

I feel like your the only person here who understands this.

[LFH]

I see but there's just too much for me to respond to right now. I'm sick to my stomach reading my MMs reiterate this story and it doesn't get any easier.

 

I created this thread for feedback and to prove a point to MM that when I say he truly doesn't mean the things to tells me that I'm right in believing so. Everyone here confirms my feelings. He couldn't handle reading past page one then couldn't help himself and read on.

 

Anyway Toxic, u keep saying u want me to be happy and I don't need u but that's a bunch of bs. Sorry. U only care about her happiness. Thanks for taking everything then wishing me well on Ur way to a new chapter of Ur life.

 

Oh honey. *hugs you softly* I was hoping he was right that you were sleeping and getting some much needed rest.

Are you doing ok?

[TaintedLuv]

Oh honey. *hugs you softly* I was hoping he was right that you were sleeping and getting some much needed rest.

Are you doing ok?

 

Thank you. I'm actually out with my sisters and friends as everyone is attempting to get my mind off of things but all I'm doing is trying not to have a breakdown and cry while I'm surrounded by hundreds of happy people. I haven't slept or ate since Thursday.

[ToxicLover43]

I see but there's just too much for me to respond to right now. I'm sick to my stomach reading my MMs reiterate this story and it doesn't get any easier.

 

I created this thread for feedback and to prove a point to MM that when I say he truly doesn't mean the things to tells me that I'm right in believing so. Everyone here confirms my feelings. He couldn't handle reading past page one then couldn't help himself and read on.

 

Anyway Toxic, u keep saying u want me to be happy and I don't need u but that's a bunch of bs. Sorry. U only care about her happiness. Thanks for taking everything then wishing me well on Ur way to a new chapter of Ur life.

 

I do want to see you happy and I know you need me I know I abandoned you and I know you will never forgive me for it

 

I wish you would just get some rest

[TaintedLuv]

I do want to see you happy and I know you need me I know I abandoned you and I know you will never forgive me for it

 

I wish you would just get some rest

 

Well I don't want to see u happy. I can only hope Ur miserable forever. That's what u deserve. But that won't happen so enjoy Ur happy little life now.

[LFH]

Thank you. I'm actually out with my sisters and friends as everyone is attempting to get my mind off of things but all I'm doing is trying not to have a breakdown and cry while I'm surrounded by hundreds of happy people. I haven't slept or ate since Thursday.

Well tomorrow if you need anything you let me know. Go be with people who can hug you right now, maybe eat some pretezels or something ok?

[LadyGrey]

I do want to see you happy and I know you need me I know I abandoned you and I know you will never forgive me for it

 

I wish you would just get some rest

 

Tainted, he said he'd leave you alone but he isn't going to it seems.........this is just more manipulation (for the whole world to see). He may not be even aware that's what it is.......because that is probably the way he has operated his whole life.

 

Tainted.......it's time you take control of YOUR life. If you desire to cut him out, there are ways to do it and folks here at LS will support you. This is not how love is supposed to be........yes the whole 7 years of it.

[ToxicLover43]

Well I don't want to see u happy. I can only hope Ur miserable forever. That's what u deserve. But that won't happen so enjoy Ur happy little life now.

 

I have to live with that fact that I disgraced your love for me. I have to live with the fact that I lost you by my own hand and betrayed you.

Edited March 3, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
removed name

[ToxicLover43]

Manipulation...

 

 

 

 

Toxic - you made your choice with your actions.

 

Now leave her to heal!!!!!

 

Please tell me how I manipulated her ?!? Please for the love of god tell me how the F saying what I think is manipulation !!?!

[ToxicLover43]

Get help dude! If you can't see how you're manipulating - you probably also don't see you're own $hit when you take a dump.

 

I could of left a blank response and you would of said the exact same thing.

 

You don't have the slightest idea what that woman needs in her life. You don't know a damn thing about her. All you know is she doesn't need me. Your disrespecting her to even think you have the slightest idea the pain she feels right now.

 

And guess what, I know no one gives a damn about the scumbag cheating MM on this forum , but I'm also hurting as well

 

The difference is , I did this by my own hand and I have to answer to myself.

 

 

 

So please spare me with ur bs that I'm saying anything to my own benefit now.

[Kamille]

If this story is for real, than I really have nothing but pity for the both of you.

 

First, you both need to quit it with the high intensity black and white thinking drama talk. One says : 'I'll never love like this again' the other says 'I don't deserve to be happy.' Bull**** on all counts. Unlike others here, I'm not a very vengeful or redistributive person and I actually believe you both deserve to lead happy, loving lives. The thing is: you're not going to get there with each other.

 

Why? Because you're clearly both invested in emotionally manipulating each other. You might both be in denial about it - particularly Tainted, but this is what is going on. Tainted, sorry, but I would really like to understand why it made sense to send him this link, this in a thread you started saying you had cut all contact. You're going to have to stop trying to have an effect on him, in whatever way, if you really want to walk away from this man. You're also going to need to start feeling your own emotions, for yourself, and not feed them to him so he can say *exactly what he thinks you want to hear* to keep you further entwined.

 

As for the guilt you express Toxic (aptly named), bull****. (Tainted, stop responding to the guilt trip he's laying on thick in this thread.) As to laughing at us for calling it manipulation: bull****. Yes - some of us are calling it manipulation because it quite plainly is. It's possible neither one of you see it that way. But as others have said, if you truly wished her well and truly meant to stay out of her life from now on, then, simply put: You would.

 

Finally, sure, your relationship is unique and no one understands it quite like you do. Fair enough. You're the ones living it. But you know what, you don't hold the patent on relationships being unique. A relationship being unique doesn't mean it's good for you. Ask anyone in an abusive relationship.

 

Every single relationship is unique. Toxic's relationship to his wife is clearly as unique as his relationship to Tainted (else, why would he still be there and why would he lamely 'give her a child before she's too old' instead of leaving her 5 years ago when she was still 'young enough' (Ah man, that one is such bull****!).

 

Basically, Tainted, considering how you are handling this, I wonder if you're really ready to let this man go or if, like him, you're addicted to the intensity and drama that came with the affair. If so, admit it, own it and find ways to deal with it.

Edited March 3, 2013 by Kamille

[xxoo]

Anyway Toxic, u keep saying u want me to be happy and I don't need u but that's a bunch of bs. Sorry. U only care about her happiness. Thanks for taking everything then wishing me well on Ur way to a new chapter of Ur life.

 

He may care. He may suffer.

 

But what is his concern worth to you, when his priority is clearly his wife? None. It's worthless. It's worse than worthless--it's destructive.

 

His brand of love is a drug that feels incredible and slowly destroys you. You need to leave it behind, forever.

[Survivor12]

Wow. Despite Toxic's insistence that none of us here at LS know anything about him or the situation, it seems that we were right on target!

 

What I find to be facinating, however, is to have witnessed first hand how quickly his mask fell off...his arrogance simply wouldn't allow him to maintain his apologetic and remorseful persona and he revealed who he really is. (Oops, excuse me, but you ego is showing!) In fact, from his first post to his second, he couldn't even keep his own story straight. (The affair began because he was unhappy in his marriage...but then--had he not met Tainted, he would never have cheated on his wife). Even when he was trying to sound apologetic and remorseful, he couldn't help blaming his actions on someone else.

 

Tainted, I warned you in an earlier post to not believe anything he says at this point because he will do anything to change your mind about ending your affair. After reading his responses, and seeing how quickly his concern and remorse turned into anger and aggressiveness the moment he realized that we weren't buying his act, I am very concerned about what he is capable of and what more he may do. People with his level of arrogance and aggression can be dangerous when they don't get what they want. Please be careful.

 

I hope you are able to see how he has attempted to manipulate you with what he has said here. The compliments and talk of how he was drawn to you in his first post was intended to remind you of what you will be missing if you end the affair....The little side notes to you about taking care of yourself while in the midst of attacking other posters was his way of making you feel that you are special (you and me against the world). In fact, him even coming here and posting had no other purpose than to suck you back in. Think about it. He said that he wasn't here for advice. He said that he wasn't here to defend himself (although he tried). He doesnt know us and we dont know him so there is no good reason for him to explain himself to us. The fact is, he came here solely in an attempt to defuse and deflect our support for you ending the affair.

 

Please don't fall for any more of his cr*p. Don't give him the chance to prolong your suffering. And as much as it may make you feel good to have him pursue you, remind yourself that it's all just a way of him getting what HE wants--to keep you hanging on the sidelines--with no real regard or concern for what is best for you.

 

Stay strong.

[William]

Moderation has seen enough <expletives ******>. Thread closed.