calgary Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 delete her/him from facebook, don't hope for texts. don't call them daily crying. keep your head held high. stay strong. stay proud.. find yourself improve yourself, find that you can be happy alone. Don't let one person rejecting you for everything you've done get you down! you're worth so much more than they're making you feel right now. Stay strong, care about the people that are caring about you right now and stop trying to care about a person who doesn't care about you ! I'm 2 months post break up.. 2 weeks no contact. I feel so so much better.. I still have moments of weakness especially when I wake up after dreaming about her, but i'm a lot better right now for the no contact. feel like I get it now! i'll probably go down hill again but I feel so much better than I did two months ago diving on every breadcrumb. hang in there ! 8 Link to post Share on other sites
Sososad Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 I totally agree ... And I'll just say entering no contact thinking you will Get them bak this way your just lying to yourself and delaying your own healing No contact is super effective and works... Stick with it You may not get the ex back but you will get a stronger and improved you!!! Good luck guys!!!!! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Mack05 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Calgary good you feel strong today but the crucial NC time is 2-4 weeks. I promise you that you will feel weaker then ever over the next 14 days. Fight it mate. Once you get past a month your are flying! Thing is I have a nasty feeling you will bump into her tonight.. Link to post Share on other sites
Own Worst Enemy Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Bit of wine last night and I ended up going over to see him (he texted after 2 days NC) for a couple of hours. We kept it v drunken and friendly/fun but of course now I am going to spend today wondering who he's with, whether his mate's new girlfriend has friends that he will get to meet and fancy.... Urgh. I can honestly say I am a billion times better than i was, and it is totally due to the initial 6 week NC stint (broken by him) though. I'd be gutted like a fish if he met someone else, but other than that I feel fine most of the time, whereas for the last 6 months before implementing NC I was an absolute mess over this guy. I have got to the stage where I can honestly see that it's just me clinging to an idea and that the real him isn't capable of giving me anything I need or want. now I just need to make that final break. NC works. Nothing else does. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
GlassesSeventy Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 What I've learnt is that NC is one of the hardest things to do. There will be days when you'll slip up and text that person, but after a while you get sick of the breadcrumbs and false hope. You actually WELCOME NC into your life. So stick with it, guys!! Link to post Share on other sites
Drummerboy420 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 I feel ya man. I was broken up with back in November, went NC. She broke it after a week or so, then I made the mistake and did like you said, and dove on every bread crumb. Got taken for a ride. Now it's back to NC now just this week. Blocked her on FB (before I just unfriended her), youtube (we were youtube stalking each other. she gets on there a lot), etc. Changed her name in my phone to MOVE ON. She wants to be friends, I told her it ain't happening. Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 OP. Im so glad you're doing better and what you say is true. @OWE - stop talking to this man. You are torturing yourself to NO end. It's getting awfully repetitive. I know you have more strength than this. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author calgary Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 Calgary good you feel strong today but the crucial NC time is 2-4 weeks. I promise you that you will feel weaker then ever over the next 14 days. Fight it mate. Once you get past a month your are flying! Thing is I have a nasty feeling you will bump into her tonight.. true mack05! I feel like I've already lost her, I don't know or care where she's been and who with! I won't take her back for that reason. My friends are demanding I go out! I think we'll only be in the place she goes for 30 minutes but to be honest, i'm not planning on talking to her, i'll blank her, walk away.. i'll say hi if she comes over but I don't feel like I have feelings for her right now at all. like I couldn't care less about her. but maybe like you say in a week or two they'll come flooding back! right now they've disappeared a lot . i'm certainly not the clingy emotional guy I was the last time I saw her. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
na49 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 4 months NC. Well kind of, I feel like NC hasn't really started for me since I blocked her number 2 months ago because I notice a major difference in my feelings towards her since then. NC is the best way to heal in my opinion. It's all about us, and has nothing to do with them. We aren't trying to "get back at them" but we are showing them that we no longer need them. We aren't the loyal puppy dog who will come running when they ring a bell. We are people with feelings and hearts that have been ripped out of our chest and stepped on. So we'll do whatever the f*ck we need to get better. They wanted us out of our life. Who are we to try and stick around? I would hate to come between her and the newest "man of her dreams". Give them their wish! 5 Link to post Share on other sites
iouaname Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Calgary good you feel strong today but the crucial NC time is 2-4 weeks. I promise you that you will feel weaker then ever over the next 14 days. Fight it mate. Once you get past a month your are flying! Thing is I have a nasty feeling you will bump into her tonight.. I'm in my third week of no contact now and so far I've felt the best that I've felt since the breakup. I hope that that's not true and that the this week or next week aren't going to be rough, but I can definitely see it happening as I get further and further from the notion that he and I will get back together. Link to post Share on other sites
Discarded2013 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 Mines coming up to 7 weeks Except for he txted me twice (once 4 texts then two texts) So tech on day 11 again I would say I was doing great until the breadcrumbs. Silence is for the best, but any contact makes me feel worthless again Link to post Share on other sites
GlassesSeventy Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 I'm on day 5 of a second attempt at NC, and I've realised she's seeing someone else. It IS hard, especially when you don't hear from them - you start to wonder if they ever cared, etc. The difference this time though, is that I don't actually want to talk to her, and if she DOES contact me I WILL be telling her in no uncertain terms to eff off. Link to post Share on other sites
Author calgary Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 Mines coming up to 7 weeks Except for he txted me twice (once 4 texts then two texts) So tech on day 11 again I would say I was doing great until the breadcrumbs. Silence is for the best, but any contact makes me feel worthless again right now I think i'd laugh at the bread crumbs. I want them just for the sake of the awesome feeling they'll bring knowing she's trying and it's too late. I feel so positive, maybe it's because it's spring now and all my friends are in town and quite a few good looking girls have been texting me lately! who knows maybe i'll turn to jelly and be a complete mess if she texts me.. or if I see her I might end up getting all the feelings for her back, but right now I doubt it! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author calgary Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 I'm on day 5 of a second attempt at NC, and I've realised she's seeing someone else. It IS hard, especially when you don't hear from them - you start to wonder if they ever cared, etc. The difference this time though, is that I don't actually want to talk to her, and if she DOES contact me I WILL be telling her in no uncertain terms to eff off. honestly, the way I see it is, she'll want you again after she realizes what she's left you for, rebounds are a good thing, because they're grabbed out of desperation.. this guy won't match up to you at all don't worry about it.. soon she'll end things with him, then she'll get sad over that break up and then it will hit her how awesome you were! so she'll have two break ups, she'll come back desperate and you'll be on with your life laughing at her. completely feel your pain of the unknown, but just think of her as dirty.. you don't want that now you don't know where its been anymore! its disgusting compared to what you have! go find what you want with somebody else because she's no longer upto those high standards you should have anymore! it does hurt to think of my ex doing things with some other guy.. but that's only because you want the old her back! this is a new person controlling her body now and she's not nice! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Discarded2013 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 right now I think i'd laugh at the bread crumbs. I want them just for the sake of the awesome feeling they'll bring knowing she's trying and it's too late. I feel so positive, maybe it's because it's spring now and all my friends are in town and quite a few good looking girls have been texting me lately! who knows maybe i'll turn to jelly and be a complete mess if she texts me.. or if I see her I might end up getting all the feelings for her back, but right now I doubt it! Ever thought the breadcrumbs don't mean what they say though? Mine have been trying to be nice then stick the boot in saying I'm seeing someone else and how happy I must be? Like wtf? You dumped me and told me to let go? What it matter if I'm seeing a whole football team? Was his choice Link to post Share on other sites
GlassesSeventy Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 honestly, the way I see it is, she'll want you again after she realizes what she's left you for, rebounds are a good thing, because they're grabbed out of desperation.. this guy won't match up to you at all don't worry about it.. soon she'll end things with him, then she'll get sad over that break up and then it will hit her how awesome you were! so she'll have two break ups, she'll come back desperate and you'll be on with your life laughing at her. completely feel your pain of the unknown, but just think of her as dirty.. you don't want that now you don't know where its been anymore! its disgusting compared to what you have! go find what you want with somebody else because she's no longer upto those high standards you should have anymore! it does hurt to think of my ex doing things with some other guy.. but that's only because you want the old her back! this is a new person controlling her body now and she's not nice! Exactly, it hurts thinking of your ex with someone else, but the way I see it? That poor guy has to put up with her, now 1 Link to post Share on other sites
na49 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 The first few weeks of NC are the worst which is why so many people "go NC" and then break it right away. They are the worst because it is becoming real. You aren't speaking to them, and they aren't speaking to you either. They throw you a random message, you respond because you think "this time it will be different" but it never is. To all of you people who have just started. Please stick to it! It will get better, you won't notice progress day to day, but week to week you will, and eventually month to month you will see changes. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
jagdude14 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 I had to go shopping early this morning. I had to go to a store right near the one my ex works. I wanted to walk in there so bad and confront her. I miss her so much but I have no idea what I did. I was broken up via text and never hear from her again. I am 7 wks no contact and there is no way I am breaking although I want to I know me doing so has more negatives. I miss this girl. I don't know why she broke up with me. To go from exchanging gifts at Christmas to just dropped in a day. While I understand she may have planned it for a bit there was no indication it was coming. I just miss her. I am still struggling. I just am struggling. Link to post Share on other sites
travelonic Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 ... And I'll just say entering no contact thinking you will Get them bak this way your just lying to yourself and delaying your own healing! That isn't to say that NC can't be a component that aids in that POTENTIALLY happening, especially when something like GIGS may be involved, just that one shouldn't go into NC expecting that will happen for cure/with the intent of making that happen. Link to post Share on other sites
d0620 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 I am on day 16 of break up and Day 12 of NC. I hope the next 2-4 weeks are not the hardest because these last 2 weeks have been so depressing and difficult for me. I have to admit that during this time I have been waiting for his call, and I know the 2-4 weeks will be hard because this is the point where I realize he will never call. Honestly I just want to get it all over with so I can feel normal again. Link to post Share on other sites
jagdude14 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 That isn't to say that NC can't be a component that aids in that POTENTIALLY happening, especially when something like GIGS may be involved, just that one shouldn't go into NC expecting that will happen for cure/with the intent of making that happen. What is GIGS? I am unfamiliar with the term seen it a bit Link to post Share on other sites
borgman1964 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 What is GIGS? I am unfamiliar with the term seen it a bit Grass is Greener Syndrome R Link to post Share on other sites
Author calgary Posted March 2, 2013 Author Share Posted March 2, 2013 Ever thought the breadcrumbs don't mean what they say though? Mine have been trying to be nice then stick the boot in saying I'm seeing someone else and how happy I must be? Like wtf? You dumped me and told me to let go? What it matter if I'm seeing a whole football team? Was his choice yeah honestly my bread crumbs got me holding hands with her, her hugging me crying on my shoulder saying she loved and missed me... all to the point I took her home and she said she can't be in a relationship right now... week later she accused me of dumping her for somebody else. she asked me to text her about it. I didn't I just left her alone. she used to make me happy.. then she gave me two months of misery and now I feel like I make me happy... I won't get her back.. I won't get a new girlfriend.. I won't keep my friends and I won't do well at work by just laying in my bed crying for another 2 months. it will just get worse.. why should I let a girl I gave everything too make me feel like that. I shouldn't be upset about losing somebody who didn't appreciate me or my feelings. i'm better off without that.. as MACK05 put it : she put a spell on me and I was under it for so long, but right now I feel free of it! Link to post Share on other sites
Discarded2013 Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 yeah honestly my bread crumbs got me holding hands with her, her hugging me crying on my shoulder saying she loved and missed me... all to the point I took her home and she said she can't be in a relationship right now... week later she accused me of dumping her for somebody else. she asked me to text her about it. I didn't I just left her alone. she used to make me happy.. then she gave me two months of misery and now I feel like I make me happy... I won't get her back.. I won't get a new girlfriend.. I won't keep my friends and I won't do well at work by just laying in my bed crying for another 2 months. it will just get worse.. why should I let a girl I gave everything too make me feel like that. I shouldn't be upset about losing somebody who didn't appreciate me or my feelings. i'm better off without that.. as MACK05 put it : she put a spell on me and I was under it for so long, but right now I feel free of it! That is sure more than breadcrumbs. Spell it sure was, just ironically 'wish' I never gave mine a 2nd chance Made me trust him again, love him again, be with him. Just to go, nah my job is more important. Bye bye I just have to wonder how much longer can I punish myself? I wasn't good enough? He never really loved me? Was it just revenge from all them years ago? I'll never know Never thought id be posting on websites like these. Another kick to the ego Link to post Share on other sites
singme2sleep Posted March 2, 2013 Share Posted March 2, 2013 It's been 6 weeks for me and I'm going crazy! No contact is so difficult after talking to your now ex, everyday when you were together. But I guess as time goes by, it will get easier. Link to post Share on other sites
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