How do you accept how you look?

[Aedra]

You've gotta work with what you've got. If you are too lazy, then don't whine about it. Diet and exercise isn't easy for anyone but we do it. It's a lifestyle choice.

 

Since you have a boyfriend, why don't you take ballroom dancing lessons together? Lots of fun and burns calories. Watch the DVD Shall We Dance with Richard Gere and Jennifer Lopez to get you both in the mood.

 

Thanks for your input. I work out 3 times a week now for the past 6 months, trying to push it to 4 lately. I really thought it would improve my confidence, but it surprised me that it did not change how I felt about myself. It's difficult trying to maintain that but I realize it's always going to be an effort. My diet can be pretty horrible still, but since I often use food to deal with emotions trying my hardest to deal with it. I will keep on exercising regardless for health reasons. So more lately I know this is largely an internal issue like camillalev mentioned. My boyfriend is long distance, although it would be pretty hilarious to see him ballroom dance lol.

Edited March 20, 2013 by Aedra

[Kamille]

I know you've all heard the saying "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder". I really believe this is true. In fact, in my late teens, at a time when I was struggling the most with body image issues, I used to play this game:

 

I would look around and choose to find people beautiful. After about 5 minutes of "looking for the beauty in everyone", I would actually see it. I would also do the flip "looking for flaws in everyone": and lo and behold, I would find flaws in everyone.

 

I did another riff on this which was the following: I noticed that I didn't look at pictures of myself the same way I looked at pictures of others. When "confronted" with a picture of myself, I would focus on the part and not the "whole". I would focus on my bumpy nose, my round cheeks, if a full body pic, I would immediately focus on my "big hips". Basically, I would tear myself apart and focus on the flaws.

When looking at pictures of others, I would look at "the whole picture" and was usually more generous to others than I was to myself. So I would play at looking at pictures of others, namely supermodels, and try to critique it as though it was a picture of myself. Again, I was completely capable of ripping it to shreds.

 

What I learned playing these silly games? That, for one, beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder. Secondly, I learned not to be so hard on myself (to look at myself as a whole and not focus so much on my perceived flaws). I guess I'm suggesting you try it, and hope it'll help you gain a better perspective.

[venusianx13]

This may help:

 

The Courage to Accept Your Own Beauty | Tiny Buddha

 

 

 

You're a good person. I see your beauty already.