iKING Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Yep, I get you. I have felt like that for the past year too. A lot of it I think is to do with me being scared because of bad past experiences. I find that when I am more emotionally open, I click with more people. You understand. It's good to be open and available to making connections in everyday circumstances, can really brighten a person's day. A girl I once knew had a philosophy of random acts of kindness, she was brilliant, and I've found that just being open and light-hearted, giving people compliments and doing little things to make people happy can have a big effect. I have no problem clicking with people in a platonic manner, I'll chat with anyone about pretty much anything and make personal connections. A lot of the time I'll just have some banter with total strangers like we've been friends for years. But giving a girl my heart and soul? No mam. It would take a really special girl to pull that one off. Wow this thread has turned into a group therapy session. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Aww f*ck! Since when was sweet a good thing in a chick? Where was my damn memo. I've been doing it all ass backwards Head are gonna roll on this one boys! Hey, as long as you happy, and not mean spirited, I prefer, strong willed and a little bitchy. As that is what it takes to stand up to me sometimes, and to keep my attention. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
iKING Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Aww f*ck! Since when was sweet a good thing in a chick? Where was my damn memo. I've been doing it all ass backwards Head are gonna roll on this one boys! Balance is a good thing to have, there are times to be sweet, and times to take a stand. Too much of one or the other can be problematic, if you're too sweet all the time, you can get walked all over, if you're too blunt all the time, you can come off as insensitive. You are sweet too though. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 You understand. It's good to be open and available to making connections in everyday circumstances, can really brighten a person's day. A girl I once knew had a philosophy of random acts of kindness, she was brilliant, and I've found that just being open and light-hearted, giving people compliments and doing little things to make people happy can have a big effect. I have no problem clicking with people in a platonic manner, I'll chat with anyone about pretty much anything and make personal connections. A lot of the time I'll just have some banter with total strangers like we've been friends for years. But giving a girl my heart and soul? No mam. It would take a really special girl to pull that one off. Wow this thread has turned into a group therapy session. I agree. Being kind to people makes everyone feel better (including yourself). And yes, I click and chat with people in a platonic manner all the time. I can even make deep friendships with other women. But going deeper with a guy? Not sure I see myself doing that in the near future. It makes me feel too vulnerable and like I have no control over anything. I hate that feeling. I am just uneasy about putting myself in that position again. And I also haven't met anyone that makes me desire to do that again either :/ 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 It makes me feel too vulnerable and like I have no control over anything. I hate that feeling. I am just uneasy about putting myself in that position again. You got to get over this ES, I know it can take some time after a bad experience, but you have to if you ever want to find a great guy. I just stopped dating a woman, as she wouldn't open up, and be vulnerable even for a millisecond. It made our dates very mediocre, and it made her seem very cold. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 You got to get over this ES, I know it can take some time after a bad experience, but you have to if you ever want to find a great guy. I just stopped dating a woman, as she wouldn't open up, and be vulnerable even for a millisecond. It made our dates very mediocre, and it made her seem very cold. I know LR My dates were really mediocre in this past year....which makes me think better not date at all unless I am willing to go deeper than that :/ Link to post Share on other sites
iKING Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 (edited) I agree. Being kind to people makes everyone feel better (including yourself). And yes, I click and chat with people in a platonic manner all the time. I can even make deep friendships with other women. But going deeper with a guy? Not sure I see myself doing that in the near future. It makes me feel too vulnerable and like I have no control over anything. I hate that feeling. I am just uneasy about putting myself in that position again. And I also haven't met anyone that makes me desire to do that again either :/ Agreed, and that's a good quality to have. It's always nice to have new friends. Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet. I can understand about not wanting to feel vulnerable. Everything about life is unpredictable, there is very little we have control over beyond our own actions and perceptions. Love in itself is highly unpredictable, like a chemistry experiment using caustic materials, and human nature makes it even more-so unstable. The goal is essentially finding someone worth being in that position for. If I find that individual, and if you do, fight for it. Chase them down and give it your all (not literally ). It'll be some crazy animal type-stuff, but I have hope that it'll be worth it. If not, at least it'll be fun while it lasts right? Edited March 9, 2013 by iKING 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Agreed, and that's a good quality to have. It's always nice to have new friends. Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet. I can understand about not wanting to feel vulnerable. Everything about life is unpredictable, there is very little we have control over beyond our own actions and perceptions. Love in itself is highly unpredictable, like a chemistry experiment using caustic materials, and human nature makes it even more-so unstable. The goal is essentially finding someone worth being in that position for. If I find that individual, and if you do, fight for it. Chase them down and give it your all. It'll be some crazy animal type-stuff, but I have hope that it'll be worth it. If not, at least it'll be fun while it lasts right? 100% agreed on the bolded. Deep down, I am a hard core romantic and I know I have it in me to do exactly that. And yes, it's always worth it, it's worth it even when it all bursts into flames. Being "in love" is one of the greatest gifts in life, and not to experience it is almost the same as not living. Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I know LR My dates were really mediocre in this past year....which makes me think better not date at all unless I am willing to go deeper than that :/ The best dates I have ever had, have been very open. she opens up some, then I do, then she opens up some more, then I do some more, around & round we go. That's how a 2 hour date turns into a 12 hour experience. Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Group hug anyone? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Group hug anyone? Just as long as you don't cop a feel! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
iKING Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Just as long as you don't cop a feel! You beat me to it! Fine, just no footsies. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Fiiine. I will just feel up archgirl and phoe then :lmao: 2 Link to post Share on other sites
iKING Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Fiiine. I will just feel up archgirl and phoe then :lmao: Whoa this got really kinky really fast. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 Group hug anyone? I think we can all learn something from Phoe and iKing. I do believe that we wouldn't be fawning over them nearly as much if we didn't have their pictures or if they were less attractive persons, but I digress. It's ironic to me that the mentality that people respect and are attracted to in others is often the opposite of the trash that they spout themselves. And I include myself in that group. Anyway. Onwards and upwards. Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I do believe that we wouldn't be fawning over them nearly as much if we didn't have their pictures or if they were less attractive persons, but I digress. BS..... ES, Iris, and other women on LS where always nice to me, before they knew what I look like. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I think we can all learn something from Phoe and iKing. I do believe that we wouldn't be fawning over them nearly as much if we didn't have their pictures or if they were less attractive persons, but I digress. It's ironic to me that the mentality that people respect and are attracted to in others is often the opposite of the trash that they spout themselves. And I include myself in that group. Anyway. Onwards and upwards. Actually, I just like the way iKing thinks. I would post the same if he had no avatar. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mesmerized Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I think LS should have a "let's flirt" subforum. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Lonely Ronin Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I think LS should have a "let's flirt" subforum. Are you trying to say you want to hit on me...... :love: Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I want to hug mes too 1 Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 I think members should adhere to the topic and post their flirting and chats in OTT. Thread closed. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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