Spanking

[Misty]

For the past three years I have been preoccupied with fantasies about spanking or being dominated. To my knowledge I have never been abused, and I've had a very normal life. I am married and have two small children. I am unable to reach orgasm without thinking about it, although I haven't always been this way. How unusual is this? What are some things that may have caused me to "need" these thoughts?

[Bobby Dygytul]

I think it is normal to have these kinda sexual fetishes. Everyone has some kinda fantasies about a sexual pleasure that somehow, someway turns them on. I myself, have sexual fantasies about girls feet. Every normal person on this planet, has some kinda sexual pleasure that somehow, someway, turns them on. (I also sometimes fantasize about being with two women at once.) hehehe I have fantasies about girls feet for a while, and a girl i was with, helped me to fullfill it, AND IT WAS GREAT!!!!! Maybe you should talk to your husband about it. He should be very understanding and maybe have some himself he would like for you to fullfill. I think it makes sex a hell of alot better.

For the past three years I have been preoccupied with fantasies about spanking or being dominated. To my knowledge I have never been abused, and I've had a very normal life. I am married and have two small children. I am unable to reach orgasm without thinking about it, although I haven't always been this way. How unusual is this? What are some things that may have caused me to "need" these thoughts?

[Tony T]

FIRST QUESTION: "How unusual is this?"

 

It is not normal or usual to have obsessive thoughts about anything, including being spanked. If these thoughts are to the point of interfering with your life, you need to get help. It is especially serious if you cannot reach orgasm without this mental tool, although I don't think it is hurtful to anyone but yourself.

 

Usually, people who have these types of thoughts have others, such as a preoccupation with their heartbeat, bodilly functions, fear of choking. There are people who have other types of obsessive thoughts such as laughing when they hear or read about news stories of people who are killed or injured. All of these require treatment if they burden the sufferer.

 

SECOND QUESTION: "What are some things that may have caused me to "need" these thoughts?"

 

Most irrational "needs" are created by the mind. Addictions are irrational needs and you seem to have an addiction to this thought. Other needs, such as those for food, shelter, air, etc., are not irrational but quite normal.

 

You have created this need for being spanked or dominated over a period of time. Only you will know when it started or how it grew from there. A good professional counsellor can introduce certain techniques to rid you of these needs. Medical hypnosis is also very helpful. Again, these thoughts or needs are only harmful if you feel they are and it sounds like you do.

[Bobby Dygytul]

You must be pissed off at the world today. Your post does make really good since and a very good point, but the way you are explaining it sounds kinda harsh. You are going to make some of these people think of themselfs as somekinda mental case. Did you not get any last night or something? lol (J/K)

FIRST QUESTION: "How unusual is this?"

 

It is not normal or usual to have obsessive thoughts about anything, including being spanked. If these thoughts are to the point of interfering with your life, you need to get help. It is especially serious if you cannot reach orgasm without this mental tool, although I don't think it is hurtful to anyone but yourself. Usually, people who have these types of thoughts have others, such as a preoccupation with their heartbeat, bodilly functions, fear of choking. There are people who have other types of obsessive thoughts such as laughing when they hear or read about news stories of people who are killed or injured. All of these require treatment if they burden the sufferer. SECOND QUESTION: "What are some things that may have caused me to "need" these thoughts?" Most irrational "needs" are created by the mind. Addictions are irrational needs and you seem to have an addiction to this thought. Other needs, such as those for food, shelter, air, etc., are not irrational but quite normal.

 

You have created this need for being spanked or dominated over a period of time. Only you will know when it started or how it grew from there. A good professional counsellor can introduce certain techniques to rid you of these needs. Medical hypnosis is also very helpful. Again, these thoughts or needs are only harmful if you feel they are and it sounds like you do.

[Tony T]

I reviewed my answer and found nothing to indicate I was pissed in any way. As a matter of fact, I still found the information I posted to be helpful, informative, and perhaps what the poster needed to know. I often find room for levity in answering people, but this dude's got a pretty serious problem that needs attention. Not a joking matter at all.

 

Now, if you want an example of me being pissed, yes...you can look down one post, I think it's entitled "a girlfriend."

 

I do appreciate your thoughts. If you read many of my posts, you will see a lot of veiled humor and a lot that's pretty obvious. I'm a pretty lighthearted guy.

[Bobby Dygytul]

i agree, that dude does have serious issues (a girlfriend). Im not trying to put you down in any way. I think you give EXCELLENT advise. You have given me some excellent advise before in the past. Im sorry if i affended you in any way. I thought you sounded a little harsh on that last post but after reading it, that guy deffinatley deserved it. What he talked about, can be VERY dangerous. Sorry for the misinturputation. I thought the chick in this post had some kinda fetish. Imight have missunderstood it. Just like i have a like for females feet, and some guys have a thing for breasts, butts, legs, etc. I never thought, that some people get so obsessed with certain sexual pleasures, that it could affect there lives. Damn, thats sickening to me. Thanks for all the good advise and keep it up.

I reviewed my answer and found nothing to indicate I was pissed in any way. As a matter of fact, I still found the information I posted to be helpful, informative, and perhaps what the poster needed to know. I often find room for levity in answering people, but this dude's got a pretty serious problem that needs attention. Not a joking matter at all. Now, if you want an example of me being pissed, yes...you can look down one post, I think it's entitled "a girlfriend." I do appreciate your thoughts. If you read many of my posts, you will see a lot of veiled humor and a lot that's pretty obvious. I'm a pretty lighthearted guy.