sick of being single Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 I've been single since February and just looking for a guy with a great personality, a sense of humor, and wants to have kids someday. I am looking for a boyfriend, who is in the future seeking marriage. I don't know what the problem is but I can't get the right guys ever. Please post below if you have advice. Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 The fact that you're looking is killing every change there is. Were you searching for a boyfriend when you met your ex? Doubtful. We usually just come across someone that we aren't looking for. That's how these things happen. When you go out looking for something special, you usually end up finding something s***ty. But one thing that troubles me is that you're looking for someone who wants marriage. How about dating them first? Take things slow. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 There are heaps of matchmaking sites. This isn't one. February isn't that long ago. Learn to live on your own happily and someone will turn up when you least expect it. Link to post Share on other sites
Davidspade Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Originally posted by UCFKevin The fact that you're looking is killing every change there is. Were you searching for a boyfriend when you met your ex? Doubtful. We usually just come across someone that we aren't looking for. That's how these things happen. When you go out looking for something special, you usually end up finding something s***ty. But one thing that troubles me is that you're looking for someone who wants marriage. How about dating them first? Take things slow. Don't agree with you buddy, Every girl I've ever been with, I went after with some effort, and I "eventually" won their hearts. When I stopped looking...nothing ever happened. No girl has ever landed on my lap when not looking. That's a big myth, little good ever happens when your unprepared or "when you least expect it" as the other poster puts it. Things only take shape when opportunity and preparedness come together. Link to post Share on other sites
bgfrombg Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 My advice is to keep looking. I don't believe in the "don't look for love, love will find you" motto either. Most of my ex's, I was looking when I found them. I'm looking again myself, it sucks though, and I believe that most of us that are always looking are just afraid of being alone, I am, I can't stand being alone, I have so much love to give someone and no one wants to take it,lol. These people that say, don't look for love it will find you, chances are they either a) have someone or b)they are happy being alone, and that's all fine, some people love being single, but people like you and me, that's not us, we want someone to share our life with. I thought I had that with my ex, but she thought otherwise, and that's fine, I want her to be happy, whether it is being single or being with someone else. Anyway, don't give up on love. Too many people have... Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 These people that say, don't look for love it will find you, chances are they either a) have someone or b)they are happy being alone, No, it has happened exactly that way to us so we can speak from experience. most of us that are always looking are just afraid of being alone, I am, I can't stand being alone So find a roommate of your own gender. Getting yourself an SO so as not to be alone is lame, lame, LAME. Take your alone time and use it to become strong and independent and comfortable with your own company. There is nothing to be afraid of. Link to post Share on other sites
bgfrombg Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Basically what I was trying to say was what I did say, some people don't mind being single, some people do. It's all about lifes choices. And true, maybe love did find you, but no it doesn't happen like that for everyone. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 It actually happens like that for lots of people. Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Nuh uh. Yes huh. Nuh uh for me. Yes huh for most people. Nuh uh you're wrong. Yes huh I know. Nuh uh for everybody. But Yes huh for me. Link to post Share on other sites
bgfrombg Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Well again, I want to emphasize, NOT EVERYONE,lol. Maybe a lot of people, not everyone. That's like saying all men are the same and all women. And what's up with that last post dyermaker, lol. Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 If you're still hashing it out, obviously you didn't get it. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 You have two choices: 1. Flip out because you're alone. Get all depressed about it. Think about your misery. Devote all your time to finding somebody to keep you company. 2. Enjoy life to the fullest. Know that your someone is out there and your hearts will find each other. I'll take (2), thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Just to present the other side of things--I'm taking choice (1), and stigmatized as it may be, It's not so bad. Link to post Share on other sites
bgfrombg Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Well I think I'll take a mix of the two. No I'm not happy cuz I'm alone, but I'm getting by on my own. Plus my lonliness is due to the fact that my brother passed away in May, and then my g/f of almost 4yrs came home one night and decided she wanted to be single and we have a son who is a year old. After you're with someone that long, you kinda get used to it and miss that companionship. And my brother and I were really close, but anyway. I'm dealing with everything and hopefully, things will start getting better, cuz I"m still waiting for them to. Link to post Share on other sites
Davidspade Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Being insecure and alone---is bad Being secure and alone---is ok Being secure, prepared, confident and sharing it with someone--- is great! The third isn't "just going to happen when you least expect it", its preparation and effort! Nothing happens aimlessly in ANY apsect of life. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts