pinkDoll Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 I'm not sure where to post this, but I caught my 12 year old bro looking at nude pictures on the net that his friend had sent. I was appalled cuz I always thought he was my innocent little bro. Anyway, I told him that I didn't want him to use the computer. He asked if I'd tell our parents, and I assured him that I wouldn't, but he's not allowed to use the internet. I guess if it's school-related and supervised, then it should be ok. I didn't yell at him or anything, just showed him that I was disappointed and shocked. Is there any other way to handle this? Any advice you guys would offer? Was I too harsh by telling him that he's not allowed to use the internet at all. I don't want him to wanna do it even more now that he knows he shouldn't be doing it. I know I should have a talk with him about this, but I'm not sure what to say. :-\ Link to post Share on other sites
Stone Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Wow that's a hard one. but kids do that, their couirious creatures. Assuming your a male figure in his life I would have a brief talk with him about sex it's time. as far as what the heck to say.... I am lost in that department but let me know I have a young son I wont have to have that talk for many years...... but I still dread it. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 I've got news for you. According to various stories I've heard on the news, kids as young as 10 are HAVING sex. Twelve is old these days. Boys that age have been looking at nudie pics (if not actual nudes, there's always underwear ads and swimsuit ads) since the dawn of time. You can maybe get a filtering program to keep him away from some of the real grungy sites, but thinking someone who's 12 is 'innocent' these days is exceedingly naive. Link to post Share on other sites
Papillon Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 The one little boy excitedly tells his pal, "Hey, guess what! I found a used condom on the patio yesterday!" Pal: "Whooaah! Grooossss! What's a patio?" Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 I was watching porn when I was 10. Invited all my buddies over from school. I was very popular those days. It's natural. Why be worried? Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Give him back his computer, and knock before entering. Link to post Share on other sites
tokyo Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 pinkDoll, I think I would be shocked, too. It´s just not the thing that you would expect from your little brother. But it´s probably part of growing up and you have to accept it. I don´t know how old you are, but your parents will also get a little shock one day when they see you with someone and realize you are grown-up and have your own life. Your little brother will probably get his pictures from his friends and you can´t avoid it, but I wouldn´t let him do it at home. I do think he should know that he´s a bit too young for this. If he looks at nude women he´ll know at least that you disapprove it. All the guys here who posted their answers: Be ashamed! Papillon - do *you* know what a patio is? UCFKevin - I am SHOCKED!!!!!! Dyermaker - you have the same sense of humor like a friend of mine, very dry humor and very eccentric I think. Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Originally posted by kooky Dyermaker - you have the same sense of humor like a friend of mine, very dry humor and very eccentric I think. Sure, but I wasn't joking at all. Link to post Share on other sites
tokyo Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Originally posted by dyermaker Sure, but I wasn't joking at all. I know... It´s the way he replies, I think he is serious, but - I don´t know, I think he´s fun, even though he thinks *I* am the weird one Link to post Share on other sites
Papillon Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Originally posted by kooky Papillon - do *you* know what a patio is? Sure, it's that, um, thing...y'know...where they find used condoms. Or something. Link to post Share on other sites
honey2005 Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Sure, it's that, um, thing...y'know...where they find used condoms. Or something. Link to post Share on other sites
morrigan Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Let the kid have his privacy--he's starting to sexually mature. I don't know how old you are Pinkdoll, but I'm sure you went through the same feelings as he is doing presently. I agree with Moimeme--twelve is not innocent anymore for many kids. I have friends who had sex when they were 12 years old, not a good idea at all. Let's just hope he sticks to pornography, if he doesn't, then maybe I would tell your parents. Link to post Share on other sites
Leikela Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 You cannot control what your brother does. In my opinion, it was wrong for you to tell him he couldn't use the internet anymore. Young boys look at nudie pictures. It's a fact of life. They are curious and want to look. It's natural. I know he's your baby brother but he isn't innocent. It's something that deep down you know he's doing but don't consciencely acknowledge. Just shake it off and let your brother take the natural course of growing up a boy. Interfering with it isn't a smart thing to do. Link to post Share on other sites
PinkDoll Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 dyermaker, his door was wide open when I glanced in. Do you have a tool to lock my eyes so I'm not intruding others' privacy? ;-) Thanks everyone for your feedback. I know he's aware of sex, but I just didn't think he'd be interested in it so soon. My older bro has been addicted to porn for a long time. I personally don't find it healthy to be addicted to something and having no control over why you're doing it. I'm just worried seeing my baby bro going in the same direction. Anyway, thanks again for the advice. Link to post Share on other sites
faux Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Originally posted by PinkDoll ...My older bro has been addicted to porn for a long time. I personally don't find it healthy to be addicted to something and having no control over why you're doing it. I'm just worried seeing my baby bro going in the same direction. From what I see, most women interpret a male's normal viewing of pornographic material as addiction. What your little brother is doing is perfectly normal, especially at his age. I think filtering out, or limiting his exploration online would not be a good thing. If he can't use your computer, he'll use another. If he can't use the internet at all, I'm sure some of his buddies will have porn. Maybe your brother, or parents' porn stash will be discovered by him eventually. Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted September 7, 2004 Share Posted September 7, 2004 Originally posted by PinkDoll dyermaker, his door was wide open when I glanced in. Do you have a tool to lock my eyes so I'm not intruding others' privacy? ;-) Shut the door for him. My older bro has been addicted to porn for a long time. I personally don't find it healthy to be addicted to something and having no control over why you're doing it. Are you qualified to diagnose addiction? I think people throw that word around too freely. Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted September 8, 2004 Share Posted September 8, 2004 Damn right they do. I suppose I'm addicted to air? To eating? To watching movies? To driving? Oh the HORROR. I shouldn't do any of those anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
spencer Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 just be thankful they weren't pictures of you. tell him you overreacted and you are sorry, i looked a nudie picts way younger than that too. just curious at that age. no big deal. than ask why it bothers you that he saw nude pictures. i remember nude women on cable tv pissing me off when i was young, but i was really mad about was, there weren't naked men allover the tv back then. it was so unfair, still is actually, though much better now Link to post Share on other sites
PinkDoll Posted September 9, 2004 Share Posted September 9, 2004 dyermaker and UCFKevin, Someone comes on the site to get advice...and . You've made your point. Now move on. This isn't about you. Spencer, haha! I don't have a problem with what other people do or the fact that there are more nude women than men on tv. I just got a little worried over my baby brother whom I foolishly considered "innocent". ;-) Anyhoo, thanks for the feedback. Link to post Share on other sites
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