Is the world trying to screw me over?!

[sillyanswer]

So do I build the comfort or not?

 

Which of those pieces of advice are you already trying? If one, then I suggest isn't working and you should try the other. If neither, pick one and try it.

 

Debating whether you're getting contradictory advice probably isn't going to get you a date. Sorry about that.

 

Anyway, my point is that the problems you face aren't outside your control. I'll go further and suggest that "the world" doesn't give a fig about you, but thinking that it does doesn't do you any favours.

[StanMusial]

The world is not trying to screw you over. The world is not against you or for you. The world just IS.

[Teknoe]

OK, now I've read your original post and the first page replies.

 

 

We already see where this is going. You need to nail that calculus class and you're still obsessed on picking up young college girls which you have a very low % (perhaps subconsciously why you target these girls, it's a far-fetched fantasy that ain't likely to happen, even less so when you don't even ask them out!)

 

I've seen this movie before. You need to focus on math, but you're too busy fantasizing about these girls and looking for your 'in.' But it never seems to come.

 

At the rate you're going, you won't get your degree. Your obsession and unhealthy balance and plain denial will get the worst of you. You'll post about it in June or July, and everyone will not be surprised when we saw it coming a mile away back in March.

 

I'm not saying ignore girls completely. Life is not so black and white. I'm saying put most if not all of your mental energy into passing that calculus class and moving on to the next phase of your life. Experience some success first in something you CAN control.

 

I just sense a whole lot of fear, confusion and plain lack of clarity to see the bigger picture here. Sadly, these words will probably go to waste, as well as Tha's and everyone else who has been trying to help you the last 3+ years.

 

Good luck.

Edited March 14, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[somedude81]

I have no interest in talking talking about my classes in this thread.

 

Since you and a couple of others mentioned it, I was doomed to fail the calculus class from the start. There is no way I can succeed at calculus, fiance and statistics all at the same time. That load is insane and I screwed up my scheduling by letting it happen.

 

I've decided to drop calculus so I can focus on my stats and finance classes and make sure I pass those two classes. Then later on I'm going to take calculus at a Jr. college and have that be the only class I'll be enrolled in.

 

And with that plan in motion, I got an 85 on my finance exam. If I was still trying to struggle through cal, I probably would have failed that exam.

 

That's all I'm going to say about school.

[tuxedo cat]

Dude you are 32 years old in college and going after attractive women 18-22. Of course you're always going to get rejected. They are probably creeped out by you to start with because you're older than everyone else. Go for chicks your own age and maybe you'll have a shot.

 

It also seems like women are completely interchangeable to you, which is gross.

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

Man up and learn to not stay where you aren't welcome.

 

I just noticed you live in SoCal.

 

I live in Santa Barbara. Want to go out and meet girls sometime?

 

Not joking.

[tuxedo cat]

There seriously is no reason why I couldn't have had a GF by now or at least had something sexual happen with a girl. It truly does feel that a higher power is toying with me.

 

Entitlement? I just want to be normal, to experience the joys and pleasures of life that everybody else gets to. (That's not an invitation for people to start telling me about others who have it worse than I do.)

.

 

You are setting yourself up for failure. You are 32-years-old, unemployed, whiney, still in college, 5'6". The harsh reality is that it is incredibly unlikely that any attractive 19-year-old girl will be interested in dating you. I say this as a woman. You could probably ask out thousands of cute college aged girls and I would be surprised if one of them agreed to go out with you. Maybe you'd get a pity date or two. I suspect to them you are that creepy older guy in their class who they all try to avoid. The sooner you come to terms with this the better.

 

You can have a girlfriend but she will need to be closer to your age and more average looking. Is that something you can live with or are you too entitled and delusional to accept it?

Edited March 14, 2013 by tuxedo cat

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

You are setting yourself up for failure. You are 32-years-old, unemployed, whiney, still in college, 5'6". The harsh reality is that it is incredibly unlikely that any attractive 19-year-old girl will be interested in dating you. I say this as a woman. You could probably ask out thousands of cute college aged girls and I would be surprised if one of them agreed to go out with you. Maybe you'd get a pity date or two. I suspect to them you are that creepy older guy in their class who they all try to avoid. The sooner you come to terms with this the better.

 

You can have a girlfriend but she will need to be closer to your age and more average looking. Is that something you can live with or are you too entitled and delusional to accept it?

 

I don't think this is very good advice at all. If he changes his attitude, then he could get girls.....even young hot ones.

[ThaWholigan]

Well, this turned into a pile-on pretty quickly.

 

All I will say is that SD needs to take more action and be disciplined. He aint the only one - we all need to to an extent. But SD absolutely must stop feeling sorry for himself and make a change otherwise it will just continue to get worse.

 

I would take HoneyBadgerDontCare's very gracious offer to get yourself into another reality.

[Lonely Ronin]

I don't think this is very good advice at all. If he changes his attitude, then he could get girls.....even young hot ones.

 

Problem is, none of us think he has what it takes to change his attitude. I mean it's been 5 years and 10K posts since he joined LS. It shouldn't take that long to figure out what's wrong and fix it.

[tuxedo cat]

I don't think this is very good advice at all. If he changes his attitude, then he could get girls.....even young hot ones.

 

Are you being sarcastic?

 

Having a positive attitude certainly helps but, I'm sorry, it's not a magic sauce that will allow any guy to get hot young women. I'm not condoning the superficial values of our society but simply pointing them out. Somedude has too much going against him to attract that particular cohort -- age, height, lack of employment/accomplishment. He would have to have the charisma of Jack Nicholson to overcome that hand.

 

Again, he could do fine with a different type of woman.

 

I wish people would stop encouraging him to ask these particular women out. It's setting him up for failure and will only make him more bitter.

Edited March 14, 2013 by tuxedo cat

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

Are you being sarcastic?

 

Having a positive attitude certainly helps but, I'm sorry, it's not a magic sauce that will allow any guy to get hot young women. I'm not condoning the superficial values of our society but simply pointing them out. Somedude has too much going against him to attract that particular cohort -- age, height, lack of employment/accomplishment. He would have to have the charisma of Jack Nicholson to overcome that hand.

 

Again, he could do fine with a different type of woman.

 

I wish people would stop encouraging him to ask these particular women out. It's setting him up for failure and will only make him deeper entrenched in negativity.

 

Ummmm I'm dating an attractive 19 year old right now (granted, I'm 26...not 32) and I'm the same height as him. She didn't know that I had a good job until after we had sex. I'm charismatic, but not insanely so.

 

So, yeah, it definitely can be done....and not with all that much effort (beyond staying positive).

 

ETA: I'm encouraging him to ask young, attractive women out because I genuinely believe that he could get them. Of course, he needs a personality and attitude adjustment first....but you have to start somewhere.

[tuxedo cat]

Ummmm I'm dating an attractive 19 year old right now (granted, I'm 26...not 32) and I'm the same height as him. She didn't know that I had a good job until after we had sex. I'm charismatic, but not insanely so.

 

So, yeah, it definitely can be done....and not with all that much effort (beyond staying positive).

 

The difference between 32 and 26 is huge to a 19-year-old. Secondly, you're not some creepy older guy who is still in college hitting on his classmates.

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

The difference between 32 and 26 is huge to a 19-year-old. Secondly, you're not some creepy older guy who is still in college hitting on his classmates.

 

No.

 

I'm a creepy older guy that parties at undergraduate college specifically to meet girls...which has been successful.

[tuxedo cat]

No.

 

I'm a creepy older guy that parties at undergraduate college specifically to meet girls...which has been successful.

 

Yeah but you're not a student. Even if the woman doesn't know what you do she has no reason to assume you're unemployed or unaccomplished -- while she would in SD's case since he's in the same classes with her.

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

Yeah but you're not a student. Even if the woman doesn't know what you do she has no reason to assume you're unemployed or unaccomplished -- while she would in SD's case since he's in the same classes with her.

 

LOL You are seriously over-estimating the amount that college girls think about things.

 

Guaranteed the girls ARE calling him creepy....but only because he's really nervous around them and has no friends. If he changes that, I guarantee that he'll start seeing some success.

 

I'm going to head you off here before you disagree with me....and we'll just leave it at "Let's just agree to disagree."

[tuxedo cat]

Can you imagine if the gender roles were reversed and a fat* 32-year-old woman were posting thread after thread about her inability to get dates with hot college-aged boys? Can you imagine people actually encouraging her to just change her attitude and she'd have some success?

 

The only reason a few guys on here are pushing him to keep trying is because they want to believe that any guy can land hot young babes. It's simply not true.

 

Those girls in his classes are calling him creepy because he is. It's not because he's socially awkward but because it's creepy for any 32-year-old man to be hitting on young girls in his classes. No amount of friends or faux confidence is going to reverse the creep factor, I'm afraid.

 

*the equivalent of super short for a guy

Edited March 14, 2013 by tuxedo cat

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

Can you imagine if the gender roles were reversed and a fat* 32-year-old woman were posting on here about her frustrations trying to get dates with hot college aged boys in her classes? Can you imagine people actually encouraging her to just change her attitude and she'd have some success?

 

The only reason a few guys on here are pushing him to keep trying is because they want to believe that any guy, no matter the hand he was dealt, can land hot young babes. It's simply not true.

 

Those girls in his classes are calling him creepy because he is. It's not because he's socially awkward but because it's creepy for any 32-year-old man to be hitting on young girls in his classes. No amount of friends or faux confidence are going to reverse the creep factor, I'm afraid.

 

*the equivalent of super short for a guy

 

sigh

 

Let's not get into this argument again. Being fat (a choice) is not the same thing as being short (genetics).

 

If a fat girl came on here complaining, I would tell her to lose weight (since MOST men mostly value looks). When a short guy complains, it's usually because he's attributing what's really holding him back (his attitude/confidence/experience) to his height. So I encourage him to change his attitude (since MOST women value the inner attributes more).

 

I encourage him because I've SEEN guys with way less than me (less intelligence, worse looks, shorter height, no job) do very well with women once they allowed themselves to.

[tuxedo cat]

sigh

 

Let's not get into this argument again. Being fat (a choice) is not the same thing as being short (genetics).

 

If a fat girl came on here complaining, I would tell her to lose weight (since MOST men mostly value looks). When a short guy complains, it's usually because he's attributing what's really holding him back (his attitude/confidence/experience) to his height. So I encourage him to change his attitude (since MOST women value the inner attributes more).

 

I encourage him because I've SEEN guys with way less than me (less intelligence, worse looks, shorter height, no job) do very well with women once they allowed themselves to.

 

Being very short for a guy is just as much of a disadvantage as being fat for a woman. Society doesn't care which is a matter of genetics vs. choice.

 

On occasion I've seen a very short older man with a hot young woman but he always has something else obvious going for him -- money, intelligence, power, real charisma.

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

Being very short for a guy is just as much of a disadvantage as being fat for a woman. Society doesn't care which is a matter of genetics vs. choice.

 

On occasion I've seen a very short older man with a hot young woman but he always has something else obvious going for him -- money, intelligence, power, real charisma.

 

You are absolutely 100% wrong here. I feel sorry for the guys reading this that don't know any better.

[Eternal Sunshine]

Being turned off by shortness is an instinctive reaction that lots of women have.

 

Being turned off by fatness is an instictive reaction that lots of men have.

 

Do you actually think that women can just say "hang on, being short is due to genetics, thus I am now turned on by a super short guy?" Just doesn't work like that.

 

Life is not fair. Deal with it.

[MrCastle]

Being turned off by shortness is an instinctive reaction that lots of women have.

 

Being turned off by fatness is an instictive reaction that lots of men have.

 

Do you actually think that women can just say "hang on, being short is due to genetics, thus I am now turned on by a super short guy?" Just doesn't work like that.

 

Life is not fair. Deal with it.

 

Women can lose weight though. That's the difference.

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

Being turned off by shortness is an instinctive reaction that lots of women have.

 

Being turned off by fatness is an instictive reaction that lots of men have.

 

Do you actually think that women can just say "hang on, being short is due to genetics, thus I am now turned on by a super short guy?" Just doesn't work like that.

 

Life is not fair. Deal with it.

 

LOL that's not what I'm saying at all.

 

I'm simply saying that being fat is a choice that can be changed any time the girl wants.

 

I'm also saying that any short guy (any guy at all, in fact) could start getting girls whenever they choose to if they change their mindsets, habits, attitude, etc.

 

Like I've said in multiple posts, I do well with women (including attractive ones). So clearly height doesn't matter that much. If it did, I wouldn't get girls. Sorry, ladies, but that's how the world really is.

 

And I don't see why everybody is attacking me suddenly. I'm just trying to encourage SD to start hitting on girls. Do you guys want him to fail? Because it certainly seems that way.

 

PS: I still think he could get young college hotties if he wanted to....and I'm standing by that.

[Eternal Sunshine]

LOL that's not what I'm saying at all.

 

I'm simply saying that being fat is a choice that can be changed any time the girl wants.

 

I'm also saying that any short guy (any guy at all, in fact) could start getting girls whenever they choose to if they change their mindsets, habits, attitude, etc.

 

Like I've said in multiple posts, I do well with women (including attractive ones). So clearly height doesn't matter that much. If it did, I wouldn't get girls. Sorry, ladies, but that's how the world really is.

 

And I don't see why everybody is attacking me suddenly. I'm just trying to encourage SD to start hitting on girls. Do you guys want him to fail? Because it certainly seems that way.

 

PS: I still think he could get young college hotties if he wanted to....and I'm standing by that.

 

He has been hitting on college girls for the last 5 years. He failed every single time. Me thinks that the reality proves otherwise.

 

I agree that he needs to change his mindset, to a more realistic one in terms of what types of girls he should hit on.

[MrCastle]

He has been hitting on college girls for the last 5 years. He failed every single time. Me thinks that the reality proves otherwise.

 

I agree that he needs to change his mindset, to a more realistic one in terms of what types of girls he should hit on.

 

His age as it pertains to where he is in life may very well play a role in his success or lack thereof.

 

However tuxedo's notion that his height is one of those factors keeping him from having success is off base as there are a number of men on this site, myself included who are below average height and do very well with women.