singme2sleep Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Which thread was that in? Also, do you believe it - mine has never instigated any contact with me since July 2011, although has answered a couple of my texts/emails (although not the last one in October and I've managed to somehow claw back some dignity and refrain from any contact since. Odd thing is, the person I am now is every bit the person he wanted). I think it was titled "do they ever think about us" and yes I do believe it. Unless you dated a robot, there's no way you can mean something to a person and then when it's over you never existed. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author RiceaRoni Posted March 16, 2013 Author Share Posted March 16, 2013 loving your self control. I've been avoiding twitter as well. It sucks because there are a lot of funny people that I used to follow and it's just fun to check to see what's happening. (like facebook). My ex made a new twitter after dumping me. Probably to remove all evidence of ever dating me. thanks... of course I found out what it was and I remember it because it's easy to remember, just like her number. Whatever. I won't use instagram for the same reason. Thanks! It had to be done :/ I know you mean too. Missing out on everything, but we have so many mutral friends. It's hard when he's brought up so I just had to. My ex didn't go as far as yours did to create new accounts, but he did delete all of our pictures off of Instagram which hurt like hell. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RiceaRoni Posted March 16, 2013 Author Share Posted March 16, 2013 From what I can remember, almost all of my shorter-termed relationships "came back." My longer-term relationships did not. Would you consider 14 months short term? Link to post Share on other sites
singme2sleep Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 loving your self control. I've been avoiding twitter as well. It sucks because there are a lot of funny people that I used to follow and it's just fun to check to see what's happening. (like facebook). My ex made a new twitter after dumping me. Probably to remove all evidence of ever dating me. thanks... of course I found out what it was and I remember it because it's easy to remember, just like her number. Whatever. I won't use instagram for the same reason. I remember my ex once telling me when we were together, that he had a twitter but having gone on it in a long while. So after he ended things, one day I was missing him a lot and decided to search for it. I typed his last name only into the people search and you won't believe what came up...the very first account was a woman with my first & middle name, and My Ex's last name. Seeing that was like taking a bullet because my ex always called me his "mrs" Link to post Share on other sites
Author RiceaRoni Posted March 16, 2013 Author Share Posted March 16, 2013 I remember my ex once telling me when we were together, that he had a twitter but having gone on it in a long while. So after he ended things, one day I was missing him a lot and decided to search for it. I typed his last name only into the people search and you won't believe what came up...the very first account was a woman with my first & middle name, and My Ex's last name. Seeing that was like taking a bullet because my ex always called me his "mrs" That must have been hard :/ I'm trying really hard to stay off. Everytime I get the urge I just tell myself. "It isn't worth it" "you're just going to hurt yourself" Link to post Share on other sites
NordicStripes Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Yes. My first ex contacted me after about 2 or 3 years, to apologize. This was after his girlfriend at the time broke up with him, because aparantly he wasn't allowed to contact me while they were together... Whatever. He called me and I told him I was not interested in his apologies (he had cheated on my repeatedly) and that he shouldn't call me again, since I was very happy not having him in my life. My second ex actually begged me to take him back after about three weeks. But only after he slept with someone else... yeah... And those are all my exes by the way ^^ Link to post Share on other sites
Author RiceaRoni Posted March 16, 2013 Author Share Posted March 16, 2013 Yes. My first ex contacted me after about 2 or 3 years, to apologize. This was after his girlfriend at the time broke up with him, because aparantly he wasn't allowed to contact me while they were together... Whatever. He called me and I told him I was not interested in his apologies (he had cheated on my repeatedly) and that he shouldn't call me again, since I was very happy not having him in my life. My second ex actually begged me to take him back after about three weeks. But only after he slept with someone else... yeah... And those are all my exes by the way ^^ Oh wow. That sounds like an excuse from your first ex. I mean an apology is not a big deal, but yeah like you said whatever lol. And wow your second ex did that? I would never accept that. It's good you realized how terrible they were to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author RiceaRoni Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 I'm missing him... He's with someone new. Has been for a while. I know he's no good, but at one point he was. I will get over this. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
travelonic Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 On the subject of them coming back to reconcile or apologize... would the number of really positive, memorable moments with you an the ex - special trips, holidays, celebrating each others birthdays, that first kiss, that first time falling asleep in each others arms, etc - and the experience of them passing say a 1 year mark since that event happened/having the memory get triggered somehow - have an impact on their eventual attempt to reconcile or apologize? Link to post Share on other sites
Jingle14 Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 On the subject of them coming back to reconcile or apologize... would the number of really positive, memorable moments with you an the ex - special trips, holidays, celebrating each others birthdays, that first kiss, that first time falling asleep in each others arms, etc - and the experience of them passing say a 1 year mark since that event happened/having the memory get triggered somehow - have an impact on their eventual attempt to reconcile or apologize? That's assuming they'll remember those memories and dates that we remember as being very special. I personally remember every date - first kiss, trips away etc - but I doubt he will because if he thought of our relationship in the same way that I do then we'd still be together. I'd like to think that thoughts of me do occasionally pass through his mind, especially when he passes places that were special to 'us' but for all I know, he has 'over ridden' those memories of me and 'us' with new one with someone else. And in that case, why would he have sentimental thoughts - like I still do - about times with 'an ex', as that's all I am, and will ever be, to him now. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Happypuppy Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 I don't even remember the dates when I first kissed my ex, or anything of that sorts. I have the memories yes, but I can't remember when it first happened. Memories is just that; memories. Maybe they will feel a brief moment of sadness/missing you/regret, but if they WERE to try to reconcile, would you want them back over false feelings..? Would you want to be with someone because they missed you for five minutes? Or because they feel they did you wrong, and would like to try to prove them self to you? No. That is not love. It is ego. Let me be frank: the only, and fastest way for you to feel fine again is to stop imagine what could have been and trying to get them back. Ask yourself this: "What is my main goal in life?" For me my main goal is to be happy! And I soon realized I hadn't been happy for a long time with my ex. What you had is over. Stop trying to get them back or win them over. It only hurts your ego, makes you feel worse when you realize you can't control another human and makes you miss them even more. That is not your main goal, is it? Do things that makes you happy. Cry when you feel like it, but find that core inside you that tells you you'll be fine. Soon you'll realize you haven't thought about your ex in hours, even days. And when you take a moment, you'll find that you are one step further to your goal of being happy in life, even without the person you thought you wanted. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Soxfaninfl Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 (edited) I would love for my ex-wife to come back and apologize for what she did and the pain she caused my son and I. Things got tough between us, and she asked me for a divorce after 9 years of marriage (11 years together). I moved out to give her space hoping that would work (after she quit MC counseling after only two sessions), but she started to see a guy 14 1/2 years her senior. I was devasted! She was the first women and only women I've been in love with. We were both 21 when we met in 1998. We've been apart now since March of 2010 and divorced since September of 2011. I've tried to move on a find a new wife, but I've been unsuccessful. Unfortunately, I can't go NC with my ex-wife since I have a 9 year old son with her. I would probably take her back because she is my first love, and we have a son together. I know I still love her and probably always will. I dated prior to her but never fell in love. I will always want my family back together, plus it would be great to see my son every day again like I used to. What really sucks is there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about her. I wish I could just forget her sometimes. Edited March 17, 2013 by Soxfaninfl Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 Would you consider 14 months short term? No, I wouldn't. Link to post Share on other sites
travelonic Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 That's assuming they'll remember those memories and dates that we remember as being very special. In my case, I think that is very much the case with my ex given how she thinks, processes things, etc. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Amelie1980 Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 (edited) From what I can remember, almost all of my shorter-termed relationships "came back." My longer-term relationships did not. Would you determine 8-9 months short term? Edited March 18, 2013 by Amelie1980 Link to post Share on other sites
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