Sarabi Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 Thanks to the lovely ComingInHot for listening to me in my desperation and hour of need I am now brave enough to share with you all what happened the past few days... Excuse me if I ramble or drive you mad but from time to time I feel like I need to talk and let it all out... Last week. With no warning I got this text from MM "S you are a vile and despicable, childish individual. After all there must be a reason why you are all alone. Now I have seen it for myself. You really make n***ers run! However i have learnt something from all of this S; you have taught me how to appreciate what i do have. A LOVING WIFE. Something that you can never offer to ANYONE! You think that an education or degree qualifies you on how to treat a man?? It is because of ANGRY &HATEFUL women like you why my brothers go outside of the race. . Despite my generous kindness and patience with you it was all hurled in my face. Today you have seen it is not only you have a temper. Do not ever contact me again. . " I shouldn't have...but I replied the next day and got this: "There is always an excuse to why you have mistreated me. . I just don't buy it. You have said it yourself "You are not a nice person" and you do not know how to apologise. What i said to you are the things you have displayed to me over the past months. Women like you never learn. I know you will do the same to the next guy and even the guy after him. You are trapped in a cycle and you should seek HELP before you destroy yourself. You do not want to hear the truth though it is clearly evident. Now i must run like all the other N****rs did and all the other N****rs will" I responded with something along the lines of how sorry I was for hurting his family...then I got told that I don't know how to treat ANY man well, that I want all black men to suffer with quarrelsome women etc. Anyway. I guess that is that. I am struggling not to let his words affect me...but I am trying. Link to post Share on other sites
LadyGrey Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 Do try to not let that hurt you, I know it's hard but those are just ugly, nasty words. Also I wouldn't be so quick to assume he is the one who wrote that. Wife maybe, but what does it matter? It doesn't. Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 Oh (((Sarabi))) I don't know your story but I have seen some of your posts and I know you did not deserve that text whoever wrote it Look after yourself 3 Link to post Share on other sites
spice4life Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 Wow, that's awful Sarabi. (((Hugs))) Don't let those words get to you. It shows that he is taking absolutely no responsibility for his actions. By minimizing you he can absolve himself of any wrong doing in his own mind. But you know what?...the mind is a funny thing and this won't last long. He will one day have to face his denial right in the face and it won't be pretty. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
eleanorrigby Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 What a c*cksucker! 5 Link to post Share on other sites
ComingInHot Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 ((Sarabi)) See?! I'm Not the only one who thinks this guy is out of line. Again he is probably "busted" and putting it all on you and is displacing what he fels about himself and his behaviors onto you. Are you completely NC now? I think he is emotionally dangerous for you to be around. p.s. Thank you for Your kind words! I totally needed them as I just got my A$$ chewed out by another poster... (I deserved it though, but "ouch") so thank you** Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarabi Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 What a c*cksucker! Woah. Lol!!! Thanks for making me smile 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarabi Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 Do try to not let that hurt you, I know it's hard but those are just ugly, nasty words. Also I wouldn't be so quick to assume he is the one who wrote that. Wife maybe, but what does it matter? It doesn't. I don't think she wrote it. I don't think she is the type...if she did I don't blame her because obviously I hurt her(or rather I played a part in hurting her) but no, you are right. It really doesn't matter. Link to post Share on other sites
waterwoman Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 Oh sarabi what a vile man! So sorry x Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarabi Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 Oh (((Sarabi))) I don't know your story but I have seen some of your posts and I know you did not deserve that text whoever wrote it Look after yourself Thanks for the hug Anne Much appreciated(and needed)!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarabi Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 ((Sarabi)) See?! I'm Not the only one who thinks this guy is out of line. Again he is probably "busted" and putting it all on you and is displacing what he fels about himself and his behaviors onto you. Are you completely NC now? I think he is emotionally dangerous for you to be around. p.s. Thank you for Your kind words! I totally needed them as I just got my A$$ chewed out by another poster... (I deserved it though, but "ouch") so thank you** I doubt you deserved to have your a$$ chewed off you are entitled to an opinion too! Oh and what someone says about you says more about THEM that it does about YOU. I guess it hasn't been long but yes. Completely NC...and long may it continue... Link to post Share on other sites
Journee Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 What a jerk. I don't know your story but these messages were terrible and hurtful and I am sorry you are in pain. His digs about race were lame and very telling about himself. If these messages were from him then please don't allow him to take up anymore space in your life. ((((hugs))))) 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ComingInHot Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 AhHA... " Oh and what someone says about you says more about THEM that it does about YOU." Exactly Sarabi !!! exactly. . Now you just need to repeat this to Yourself until You believe it** (I will to) I know, it still hurts though, I wish I could help more. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarabi Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 What a jerk. I don't know your story but these messages were terrible and hurtful and I am sorry you are in pain. His digs about race were lame and very telling about himself. If these messages were from him then please don't allow him to take up anymore space in your life. ((((hugs))))) Hey thanks for the message and encouraging words Journee I honestly don't know what those digs were about. I never gave any mean spirited/nasty comment about him and his relationship Anyway. No matter...I guess I should try to let go and move on. P.S. Thanks for the hugs x Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarabi Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 I don't know why but I keep thinking about what I did to make him angry. Or if I could have said anything beforehand that would have not made him blow up at me. In some ways its confusing...I don't know what apology he expects(his wife needs it more surely?) but what was he expecting from me that I didn't do? I keep thinking about all the "I love yous" and nice, sweet things he would say and if he ever meant them. All the conversations we had...if he hated me for 6months he could have gone long before now(!) meh...its not worth thinking about I suppose. More questions than answers. I know I need to stop (or wind down at least) and that I am giving this man far too much airtime in my head..! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Sarabi Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 His words are just seepage from the pit of nothingness. Lol...I likey ;-) I will try to remember this thank you! Link to post Share on other sites
psm04 Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 I don't know why but I keep thinking about what I did to make him angry. Or if I could have said anything beforehand that would have not made him blow up at me. Please don't think that something you did or didn't do made him angry and say those things. It has nothing to do with you, and says a lot about the kind of person that he is. I don't know the details of your story, but regardless, no one deserves to hear the crap that he said. I'm so sorry that you had to endure that 1 Link to post Share on other sites
18Years2Late Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 I don't think she wrote it. I don't think she is the type...if she did I don't blame her because obviously I hurt her(or rather I played a part in hurting her) but no, you are right. It really doesn't matter. If she didn't write it...he wrote it for her benefit...as evidenced by "A LOVING WIFE"...she was standing there when he wrote it...OR...he wrote it simply so he could run like a proud little boy and show is mommy...BTDT... Don't let it affect you S...MM don't think that much...if he was really done with you (and I assume he is)...he wouldn't waste time writing you or thinking of what to write...he wouldn't care...he'd b done with it all...including writing you...but the W isn't done...and I'm positive she had something to do with it... (((((S))))) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
18Years2Late Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 I don't know. He threw in a lot of 'not treating a man right' nonsense. I think the wife comment may have been to make S feel bad - you know, reminding her that he's married and that he loves his wife - because most of his other comments made it seem like somehow his ego had been bruised by S and it's eating him up. Out of curiousity, does it make it better if the W had something to do with it? Well yes...only bc when someone is in pain do to a specific persons actions it would feel better to know that he actually didn't write it and/or mean it...otherwise if S were further out with her NC and completely indifferent...no it wouldn't matter who wrote it...bc she wouldn't care either way... Link to post Share on other sites
Mount Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 Wow, those txt msgs are really bad and you certainly do not derserve that. But before those bitter txt msgs, what happened exactly between you and the MM? What made him sending you such thing? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 ((Sarabi)) See?! I'm Not the only one who thinks this guy is out of line. Again he is probably "busted" and putting it all on you and is displacing what he fels about himself and his behaviors onto you. Are you completely NC now? I think he is emotionally dangerous for you to be around. p.s. Thank you for Your kind words! I totally needed them as I just got my A$$ chewed out by another poster... (I deserved it though, but "ouch") so thank you** He's a complete A-hole! Cruel on purpose and it just shows who HE is. Sorry that you're hurting. Though I have to say be glad you don't have him in your life. Much of his anger that he has is more than likely anger at himself and he is trying to put it all on you. HE feels like crap so he thought you should too. Good riddence! Once you rebound from this, and you will - YOU get to start fresh and be free of him! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
stevie_23 Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 OMG! His words are just WARPED! You want all black men to suffer? What!? How projected-racist is that!? His words are ALL about him and his mental issues, NOT about you as a person. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ThatJustHappened Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 See, to me his texts read like this: Text 1: S, please come and kick me in the n*ts as hard as you can. Text 2: Oh, and be sure to wear steel-toed shoes. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
stevie_23 Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 If my ex-MM wrote something like this to me, I’d be absolutely shocked, since he would just NEVER do that. I would also feel rather sad for him, as it seems to me he would have to be feeling very angry and hateful towards HIMSELF in order to do this. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
spice4life Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 See, to me his texts read like this: Text 1: S, please come and kick me in the n*ts as hard as you can. Text 2: Oh, and be sure to wear steel-toed shoes. Hahaha! Too funny! Thanks for the laugh. Link to post Share on other sites
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