Ex wants me back but she's engaged O_o

[A n t h o n y]

Going to make this short. Ex left me for a guy a while back almost instantly engaged him and now literally 9 months today she calls me, asks me if I have some random object however I know this is just some lame attempt to see me. We go on a walk, talk for a few hours, and I pretty much get told she made a mistake, she misses me, she's sorry for everything, and she regrets ever being with him in general. At this point I can't really talk because my mind is blown. The thing is however she's still engaged to this guy so what the hell is going on?

[thefooloftheyear]

.....But did she actually say she wants you back??

 

TFOY

[TaraMaiden]

Until she turns up on your doorstep, tells you she's dumped him, and would do anything to make amends, repair the damage and try again, take the breadcrumbs with a hefty pinch of salt.

 

Dancing round an issue, isn't discussing the issue.

If she wants to come back, she needs to make it abundantly clear - you're not psychic.

 

I bet if you were to ask her now, "Do you want to come abck with me?"

 

She would Erm... and she would er.....

[destroyed4sho]

She maybe getting cold feet with the other guy.

 

i agree with tara...did she say she wants you back NOW or some undisclosed date in the near future?

[Waz]

Until she turns up on your doorstep, tells you she's dumped him, and would do anything to make amends, repair the damage and try again, take the breadcrumbs with a hefty pinch of salt.

 

Dancing round an issue, isn't discussing the issue.

If she wants to come back, she needs to make it abundantly clear - you're not psychic.

 

I bet if you were to ask her now, "Do you want to come abck with me?"

 

She would Erm... and she would er.....

That.

 

Give more value to actions, not to talking.

[A n t h o n y]

She legitamely said she wanted me back but she's engaged and I'm not about to get involved in that mess.

[Mack05]

I think its immaterial if she said she wanted him back or not. Just look at this logically..

 

She is with guy and they break up, then she ends up with Anthony who has just come out of a toxic 2.5 year relationship. Then her ex comes sniffing around and Anthony is dumped. A few months later she is bored with the ex so back to Anthony. Anyone else see a trend?

 

This girl (not woman) is nothing but drama and you are the bigger fool who continues to engage her. This girl has the emotional maturity of a grapefruit.

 

Now the smart thing is to text her and say -> "Listen sweetheart I'm done with your looney tune crazy ways and your quintessential immature drama. Never contact me again, if you do I will never answer. Have a great life". Then NEVER give her a second thought.

 

Now will Antony do that? No cause he too has the emotional maturity of a grapefruit. Antony I know I am harsh, but it is very annoying trying to deal with people who simply have no interest in helping themselves.

 

You are the problem now (not her) and unless you address your personal issues outside of the confines of a relationship, it's going to be one drama filled relationship after another. I mean you have already had three in a row. At what point do you say 'enough'? Who knows. It seems you to love the immature drama. If you didn't, you would want to help yourself...

 

Helping yourself is completely cutting this woman from your life, never thinking about her again and working on the 'issues' that hinder you right now. The issues which are responsible for attracting such toxic women..

Edited March 23, 2013 by Mack05

[Cogee]

It seems to me she got engaged to someone way too fast and as the date draws closer she is having doubts. This is the danger of getting engaged without getting to know someone more.

 

Make sure she understands that you are not getting involved with her in any capacity until her engagement is broken off and she leaves that guy. You also need to determine if she is just clinging to you because she is familiar with you and needs a comforting out or if she truly wants you back.

[fancy feast]

She's in too deep, you're the way out.

[Woggle]

Run like the wind.

[destroyed4sho]

She's in too deep, you're the way out.

 

bahahahaaaaa............just perfect and to the point.

[Hopeful30]

She is marrying her rebound? Uh oh :S

 

There's nothing you can do now my friend. Even IF she breaks the engagement and goes back to you.... do you really wanna date a woman who had to GET ENGAGED to realize her mistake?

 

What if she gets back with you and does something else that's completely mind blowing just to REALIZE something?

 

I say stay away. This doesn't sound like a good situation to get involved in. (Plus I think that 9 months is NOT long enough a relationship to get engaged. Just my opinion.)

[MYCluciferase]

Forget the ex wanting you back for now.

 

She's engaged, and if she isn't happy with that, she should end things with her fiancee and get that sorted out.

 

You should tell her to just go and sort herself out and give her no encouragement that you'll be there for her or that you'll date her when she's done that.

 

Seems like she's trying to do a 'Tarzan swinging on the vines' thing with relationships, i.e. not letting go of one relationship before she's got hold of the next one. This makes me a little suspicious that she might have had fiancee guy hooked before she left you.

 

Right now who's to say if she wants to get back with you or just wants a way to get out of the engagement and doesn't like being single?

 

Let her finish things first, be single for a while and then ask you out.

 

My guess is that she won't want to do that; although she may genuinely like you, my guess is that you'll be another stop-gap if you let yourself be the escape route from her engagement.

 

Sorry if that take on it is a downer...