will1988 Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 the white guy I like went for a lightskin black girl. so I don't know what you're talking about. does it honestly matter? you are making a big deal about the color of your skin even though clearly no one else cares either way! stop being a self hating black girl, and just embrace it, love yourself etc... and guys will be in to you! If you can't love yourself, then no one will love you either! Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted March 28, 2013 Author Share Posted March 28, 2013 does it honestly matter? you are making a big deal about the color of your skin even though clearly no one else cares either way! stop being a self hating black girl, and just embrace it, love yourself etc... and guys will be in to you! If you can't love yourself, then no one will love you either! yes skin color does matter. it matters a great deal. whether white or black, men seem to prefer lightskin and this bothers me Link to post Share on other sites
123321 Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 yes skin color does matter. it matters a great deal. whether white or black, men seem to prefer lightskin and this bothers me It's all about facial features for me, a pretty face is a pretty face, seriously. I do know a guy who won't date black women but he's a racist and won't date any shade of black. If you have a decent body and a good face and so on a lot of guys will want to date you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted March 28, 2013 Author Share Posted March 28, 2013 It's all about facial features for me, a pretty face is a pretty face, seriously. I do know a guy who won't date black women but he's a racist and won't date any shade of black. If you have a decent body and a good face and so on a lot of guys will want to date you. if the only thing that mattered was a pretty face and good body (and not skin color) then why do black men choose non-black women as partners when they attain wealth/education? why do most wealthy men exclude darkskin black women if skin color didn't matter?? you're just telling me what I want to hear..all this "skin color doesn't matter, you just have to be pretty" is a bunch of politically correct feel good messages. its not hitting reality at all. skin color is a HUGE deal and its a determining factor for many men when choosing a partner Link to post Share on other sites
123321 Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 if the only thing that mattered was a pretty face and good body (and not skin color) then why do black men choose non-black women as partners when they attain wealth/education? why do most wealthy men exclude darkskin black women if skin color didn't matter?? you're just telling me what I want to hear..all this "skin color doesn't matter, you just have to be pretty" is a bunch of politically correct feel good messages. its not hitting reality at all. skin color is a HUGE deal and its a determining factor for many men when choosing a partner No, I'm telling you about my preferences because I can't speak for or presume to have polled a statistically significant group of others. Link to post Share on other sites
will1988 Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 if the only thing that mattered was a pretty face and good body (and not skin color) then why do black men choose non-black women as partners when they attain wealth/education? why do most wealthy men exclude darkskin black women if skin color didn't matter?? you're just telling me what I want to hear..all this "skin color doesn't matter, you just have to be pretty" is a bunch of politically correct feel good messages. its not hitting reality at all. skin color is a HUGE deal and its a determining factor for many men when choosing a partner yes, but you turned down my non politically correct but truthful response. what do you want me to tell you? Most guys don't care about skin color, but looks... however, as I said, most white guys don't want to date someone who is out of their socio-economic circle unless she is really good looking... and in the case of what you are talking about, there is some steriotyping of all (doesn't matter what shade) black women by a lot of white men. If a black girl is percieved as "ghetto" a lot of white guys won't care if she is as dark as say someone who is originally from western Africa, or someone who only has one grandparent who is black. I am not saying black women are ghetto, not at all, I've found several black woman (of many shades) to be attractive in my life...One was very dark and looked like she could've been a super model, but instead she chose to go into foreign affairs...she had looks and brains, and honestly probably a bit out of my leauge. However, if you are swearing all the time, acting very controlling towards your man... and acting steriotypical most white guys find that as a real turn off! I am not saying you are any of these things, and you do seem to be articulate etc... but it is a steriotype bias that still exist. It is the same thing why a lot of white guys will not date white girls that seem "trashy"... whether they are, or are not is a different matter. So when a white guy sees a black girl the way she acts and handels her self will probably determain if he approaches you, or not. I do know one thing though, if you are so insecure about your looks then of course you will have little success... Guys do not find woman who hate themselves to be attractive. So embrace your ebony skin and be confident and all types of guys will go after you! Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted March 28, 2013 Author Share Posted March 28, 2013 yes, but you turned down my non politically correct but truthful response. what do you want me to tell you? Most guys don't care about skin color, but looks... however, as I said, most white guys don't want to date someone who is out of their socio-economic circle unless she is really good looking... most whites are not even wealthy. :rolleyes:i'm just sayin'. and in the case of what you are talking about, there is some steriotyping of all (doesn't matter what shade) black women by a lot of white men. If a black girl is percieved as "ghetto" a lot of white guys won't care if she is as dark as say someone who is originally from western Africa, or someone who only has one grandparent who is black. I am not saying black women are ghetto, not at all, I've found several black woman (of many shades) to be attractive in my life...One was very dark and looked like she could've been a super model, but instead she chose to go into foreign affairs...she had looks and brains, and honestly probably a bit out of my leauge. However, if you are swearing all the time, acting very controlling towards your man... and acting steriotypical most white guys find that as a real turn off! I am not saying you are any of these things, and you do seem to be articulate etc... but it is a steriotype bias that still exist. It is the same thing why a lot of white guys will not date white girls that seem "trashy"... whether they are, or are not is a different matter. So when a white guy sees a black girl the way she acts and handels her self will probably determain if he approaches you, or not. I do know one thing though, if you are so insecure about your looks then of course you will have little success... Guys do not find woman who hate themselves to be attractive. So embrace your ebony skin and be confident and all types of guys will go after you! they dont mind when latinas do it and they still date them Link to post Share on other sites
will1988 Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 most whites are not even wealthy. :rolleyes:i'm just sayin'. they dont mind when latinas do it and they still date them @ your first post, true... @ you actually may be right about that... but then again, you don't really see many Latina girls with white guys, you see some (like my brother and his wife) but not that many. The overwhelming majority of white guys who date outside of their race seem to go towards Asian women. That and whether or not Latino/Latina is a different race is also up to debate in some circles... eitherway, start loving yourself more and stop caring about the color of your skin and be confident, I am sure guys will go after you! Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted March 28, 2013 Author Share Posted March 28, 2013 @ your first post, true... @ you actually may be right about that... but then again, you don't really see many Latina girls with white guys, you see some (like my brother and his wife) but not that many. The overwhelming majority of white guys who date outside of their race seem to go towards Asian women. That and whether or not Latino/Latina is a different race is also up to debate in some circles... eitherway, start loving yourself more and stop caring about the color of your skin and be confident, I am sure guys will go after you! I dont see many White guys with Asian women at all. I've never even seen one White man/Asian woman coupling where I live Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted March 28, 2013 Author Share Posted March 28, 2013 if most white guys go for asian women than that leaves scraps for me. what am I going to do?? loving myself isn't getting me a date Link to post Share on other sites
SmileFace Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 This thread makes me want to bash my head against the floor... just saying. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Uncle Indy Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 I dont see many White guys with Asian women at all. I've never even seen one White man/Asian woman coupling where I live You must live in Kentucky or some **** then LOL 2 Link to post Share on other sites
123321 Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 I dont see many White guys with Asian women at all. I've never even seen one White man/Asian woman coupling where I live Where in the world do you live? There are support groups for yellow fever here. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Nyla Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 (edited) I have had more than one white boyfriend, including my husband. All of them loved my dark skin. Love yourself and other people will love you. Why on earth would you waste your time with someone who looks down on the darkness of your skin? If your beliefs about white men and skin color were correct, there wouldn't be dating services or Facebook groups dedicated to relationships between white men and black women. Look how much darker Iman is compared to David Bowie. Robert De Niro loves his black wife. She has light skin but typical "african" features such as a wide nose and mouth. It seems like you come from a small town or area with mostly white people. Maybe some travelling will do you good. Edited March 28, 2013 by Nyla 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted March 28, 2013 Author Share Posted March 28, 2013 I have had more than one white boyfriend, including my husband. All of them loved my dark skin. Love yourself and other people will love you. Why on earth would you waste your time with someone who looks down on the darkness of your skin? If your beliefs about white men and skin color were correct, there wouldn't be dating services or Facebook groups dedicated to relationships between white men and black women. Look how much darker Iman is compared to David Bowie. Robert De Niro loves his black wife. She has light skin but typical "african" features such as a wide nose and mouth. It seems like you come from a small town or area with mostly white people. Maybe some travelling will do you good. are you african american? Link to post Share on other sites
Zulnex Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 In my case, I am not concerned about the color of their skin. Inner beauty and the personality of a person, is what I care about the most. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
will1988 Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 if most white guys go for asian women than that leaves scraps for me. what am I going to do?? loving myself isn't getting me a date outside of dating white girls, I've dated an Indonesian girl and a Japanese girl at various points in my life... half my friends have "yellow fever"...and my asian male friends love white women. I don't know where you live, but you must not be noticing anything! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted March 28, 2013 Author Share Posted March 28, 2013 outside of dating white girls, I've dated an Indonesian girl and a Japanese girl at various points in my life... half my friends have "yellow fever"...and my asian male friends love white women. I don't know where you live, but you must not be noticing anything! where are the guys who have black fever?? who is going to date me?? i am the last option for every single man on earth Link to post Share on other sites
will1988 Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 where are the guys who have black fever?? who is going to date me?? i am the last option for every single man on earth with an attitude like that you are! I have a friend who mostly dates black women, and I'm talking "dark"... but he is taken and with your attitude I'd doubt he, or guys like him, would go for you. You need to be confident and start loving yourself! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
hppr Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 with an attitude like that you are! I have a friend who mostly dates black women, and I'm talking "dark"... but he is taken and with your attitude I'd doubt he, or guys like him, would go for you. You need to be confident and start loving yourself! In another thread she said she gets hit on by guys all the time but they aren't 'tall' or 'her type'. There's a girl at my work who is 5'2" tall and 200lbs and she has a boyfriend who loves her. He's fat too but hilarious personality and treats her well. I guess my point is that every girl/guy has decent options they just don't usually come in the sort of package that they think they want... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TaylorBe Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Oh sorry didn't mean to offend. Kerry's not mixed though. I find it offensive that you say that just because some black women like Kerry aren't black because they don't look like you when they are. Like you're the end all be all of what's black. That's insulting. That's why I said you stereotype on what's black because to me it seems you seem anyone who doesn't look like you as something else. When its just not true. You two are clearly having a miss understanding. Missjoness is not claiming to be the sole definition of black. Almost all Black people (descendents of slaves) are mixed due to slavery in the U.S. Some have more African blood in them like Missjoness and others have more European blood like Kerry Washington. Typically Black women with more European blood running through their veins have softer features and they fit the European standards of beauty. Not to offend you but I think I remember reading somewhere that you were offended by people confusing your religious beliefs as a cultural difference due to there ignorance. I would caution you to be careful on this subject because your lack of knowledge yet assertiveness about what it means to be black versus mixed can come off offensive as well. Link to post Share on other sites
TaylorBe Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 MissJoness I completely understand where your coming from. I'm chocolate and all of my girls are East African or mixed. I have a very active life and to this day I have never been approached by a respectful man. I use to think it was because I still had some baby fat on me so I got in shape. Nothing has changed still no suiters. I think I'm a great catch. I'm educated, successful, fit and all the guys I know say I have a great personality. But when I see the women they date they tend to look a lot like my Eritrean friends, or my half black half something else friends. They never look like me. I use to be down about it...depressed even but now I'm just over it... I cant lighten up...well I can but all the creams on the market just makes you look crazy. So I'm doing me and I'm learning to be ok with not having a significant other in my life because not a large pool of men find my skin complexion attractive. I focus on things that make me happy like teaching robotics to students in underserved communities or training for my first marathon I just completed a week ago and now my first triathlon. I promise if you dont think about it it wont hurt as much. I stopped thinking about over a year ago and until I read this thread I forgot I struggled with skin complex issues lol 7 Link to post Share on other sites
Nyla Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 are you african american? I am black but not American. My skin tone is the same as TaylorBe's. Still never had a problem with white men not finding me attractive. Quite the opposite! Link to post Share on other sites
Author MissJoness Posted March 29, 2013 Author Share Posted March 29, 2013 I am black but not American. My skin tone is the same as TaylorBe's. Still never had a problem with white men not finding me attractive. Quite the opposite! I'm noticing a lot of white men go for non-American Black women. why is that? Link to post Share on other sites
Nyla Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 (edited) I couldn't tell you. I live in Canada. Edited March 29, 2013 by Nyla 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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