John1 Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 Ive posted her before about getting my ex back.. I was with my ex Rachel for 4 years.. she was the love of my life and still is.. 15 months ago we split up over mestupid drunkenly_ kissing another girl.. we were so happy together and had planned on moving in together and have plans on getting married and spending the rest of our lives together...Then 15 months ago I drunkenly kissed another girl and i was so guilty.. i told rachel and we then split up... I have been trying ever since ( 15 months now ) to see if she will give me a 2nd chance.. but she wont.. she has changed her phone number and she has moved out of home ( which she was doing anyway as we were due to move in together ) so i cant really contact her and when i do see her i ask for 2nd chance and she says no, that i dont deserve a 2nd chance.. this was a girl who upto 15 months ago would have said yes if i had produced an engagement ring.... She loved me , She tells me she doesnt love me anymore.We had a great relationship.. we did have out fights and disagreements but nothing that would break up a relationship. .now over this isolated drunken mistake it has cost me my love and I miss her so much.. I still love her with all my heart. I did push her when she split up for a 2nd chance.. I begged and pleaded and sent her letters etc.. she was my 1st girlfriend and it was my first breakup so i just fell apart... I was stupid and Im learning now.. whether its too late or not is another matter.A female friend of mine who is also friends with rachel told me about 8 months ago that " If you give her time she will come back , and she will come back" so thats positive at least but its not definite.. I know i reacted badly to breakup but the last 12 weeks where i have not seen or heard from her has been good as I can focus on myself and not be worried about her or what shes doing or whos shes with etc... I saw heryesterday for the 1st time in 3 months.. I was leaving shopping centre and she was entering with some guy, he could be a new boyfriend or he could be a guy she shares a house with i honestly dont know.. i said "hi rachel" and she looked up and said "hi" and that was it.. I didnt want to push it or act needy as the previous 12 months i had pleaded and begged etc and acted needy and pushed her away.. so by saying a simple hello it wouldnt come across as weak or needy..Basically in the last 15 months Ive tried everything possible to win her back but have only succeeded in driving her further away. so hopefully this No Contact may work.. Now yesterday was the 1st time in 3 months i had seen or heard from her.. All I got was a "hi" I know a lot of other girls.. I work with loads of girls at work and get on great with them. BUT at the same time I want to see if No Contact will work for me... I dont want to put my life on hold too much longer but I feel what we had deserves a 2nd chance... Just wondering if you can give me any advise to get her back or if you think im wasting my time and should move on to another girl Link to post Share on other sites
rogueless Posted September 12, 2004 Share Posted September 12, 2004 I think you should learn from your mistake and move on... Link to post Share on other sites
backspn Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 Kissing a girl is a huge deal but if she really loved you she wouldnt dismiss you this easy. Im usually pretty optomistic but I think she has moved on. Girls do this to protect themselves so they wont get hurt. Its easier for her to move on if she hates you. It has been over a year and she hasnt made any moves? I hate to tell you but its over and you should move on. I agree....learn from your mistake and DONT kiss another girl when your involved. I dont blame your ex at all. Dont give us good guys a bad name. Link to post Share on other sites
lost_in_chgo Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 If anything is going to happen it should within a couple weeks. Seeing you might trigger her to want to call. If you don't hear anything you have your answer. Link to post Share on other sites
EC Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 You said it yourself....She had dreams of marrying you and moving in together and living the rest ofyour lives together. But you know whats she's thinking...Why when you were drunk did you not remember all those plans...Why did you not remember the plans of moving in together and getting married and just the simple fact that you had a relationship and were in love. Drunk or not it's not excuse you gave into temptation and you killed whatever glow there was when she looked at you. I'm sorry But it's true if after a year she has not done anything to take you back and none of your attempts have worked then you have to move on because she obviously has. You take it as a lesson learned even though it hurts and you move on. I've been cheated on and I left him and never looked back. Its just not the same anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
prevch Posted September 13, 2004 Share Posted September 13, 2004 See I say never give up......ever Link to post Share on other sites
Splatty Posted September 15, 2004 Share Posted September 15, 2004 I agree with the rest. Move on... just learn from your mistake. Link to post Share on other sites
prevch Posted September 15, 2004 Share Posted September 15, 2004 yah do learn from your mistake and if something else comes along don't throw it out as an opportunity but if you really love her pursue her. Make sure that you really love HER though not YOU. The reason I say that is because I think a lot of times, guys especially, when they get dumped their heart gets broken but their EGO gets broken worse. Make sure you are after her because you love her and not to fix your shattered ego after being ditched. I hope it turns out for ya buddy Link to post Share on other sites
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