Am4Real Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Oh joy the weekend is almost here!! Does anyone dread the weekends at this stage? Seems like there is less focus on these two days than during the workweek and the mind gets distracted, one tends to internalize more, etc Makes me sad – lonely – wandering – missing! How about you? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Smiley88 Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Im at 5 weeks after the breakup and until now, all weekends were hell:) Before i met this girl a year ago i was perfectly fine being on my own, i really enjoyed solitude. Now, I changed so much this last year that i feel im missing out by just being by myself. Even going out to party doesnt help. I used to do that with her and afterwards always spend the night together.Now after partying,i go home alone and its sad, i am not in the mood to pick up girls or try with another one at this moment, but i also started hating being alone..i miss her:) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
misswillow Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 I actually just came on here to start a thread about this myself. So yes, I hate weekends with a passion. And this weekend is Easter, which is not that big of a deal to me because I'm not religious, but it will be the first holiday I spend without my ex in 2.5 years. And I have no plans for the day, nor would I really want any because being around happy people would make me feel worse. I have a few goals for the weekend...clean the apartment, do my taxes, go for a run (I haven't worked out in ages), take my dog for a couple of long walks. But I've had these goals for several weekends and can't seem to find the motivation (except for walking my dog). And it doesn't help that I am getting that urge to contact my ex...today is 10 days NC and I honestly didn't think I would ever get the urge to contact him again because our last conversation was so heartwrenching. But alas, here I am wanting to torture myself again. :( 1 Link to post Share on other sites
srivers89 Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Yes weekends are tough this is my 1st full week since the breakup, very up and down. I'm trying to stay with the no contact thing and just occupy my mind as much as possible. If you find yourself having a fair amount of free time on the weekend I suggest watching tons of movies no matter how bad they are lol it helps OR going to take a walk around your city's most populated area especially if the weather is nice, the fresh air will help you. Link to post Share on other sites
targaryen Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 to be honest for me it's the opposite...my friends are more accessible in the weekends so it's in the evenings between monday - thursdays that my loneliness feels the worst... Link to post Share on other sites
singme2sleep Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Weekends always make me sad now, it's funny how I used to look forward to them, now I can't wait til they're over. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
coralie Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Weekends are a complete nightmare to get through for me, and when I woke up this morning, I was really struggling again. Everyone else is all full of joy and all "Happy Friday!!!" and "TGIF!!!" and here I am barely able fake a smile even. I also don't feel like being with a lot of happy people or go out dining or to a party, etc. I've watched so many movies and tv shows that I'm so sick of them and anything that has to do with love or romance or couples in the movies or tv upsets me anyway. I took a kind LSer's advice and told myself this weekend I'd make a serious effort to get out more and run more errands or take a walk or go hang out somewhere by myself at the very least. Just anything to get out and distract myself and hopefully change my frame of mind a little. I don't feel motivated at all but I'll do it anyway. I wish I had more good friends here. I'm pretty sure the two closest friends I have who don't live here are tired of listening to me on the phone or chatting about my breakup even if they didn't come out and say it, so I don't feel like I can really use them as support. Plus they're so far away. I don't have the kind of relationship with my parents where I can really talk to them about this either. Coworkers and other acquaintances aren't close enough where I'd even consider talking to them about this. I feel so lonely with nowhere to turn, and weekends just make me even more aware of this. Link to post Share on other sites
na49 Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Yup. Weekends are definitely the worst time for people who are heartbroken. Having more time to yourself should be a good thing, but it rarely ever is for me. I'd rather be in school, or at work than sitting here thinking about her. I do go out every now and then, but even going out sucks because I always want to tell her where I am and I can't do that because she doesn't care. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
misswillow Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 I've watched so many movies and tv shows that I'm so sick of them and anything that has to do with love or romance or couples in the movies or tv upsets me anyway. All I've been able to watch for weeks are true crime TV shows (Investigation Discovery shows them 24/7), or Lifetime movies about "love that turns deadly." I'm not usually into this kind of stuff, but anything happy or romantic just makes me miserable. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RiceaRoni Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 I admit, they can be very difficult because he and I always used to do things on the weekend and now I imagine him doing things with his new gf...it's sickening. Just try to get out with some friends, or clean your house, work on a project, have fun with family, just things to keep your mind busy. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Am4Real Posted March 29, 2013 Author Share Posted March 29, 2013 Reading all of our posts in this thread makes me at least feel normal going through this stage, but it is so awful; it becomes very hard to live with at times. Link to post Share on other sites
McDonald Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 weekends used to be really bad for me. Too much time to think, to be alone. I used to spend all my time with my ex. My whole weekend with my ex. Kinda sucks now because she never let me go out with my friends and now that she is gone I dont have anyone to go out with because I alienated them. Now however, it is getting better. I am going out more, but I still have thoughts of her. Weekends do get better, but you have to allow yourself to enjoy them for what they are. Accept that your gf/bg is gone, and now begin to live your life with yourself.Be you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Babolat Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Yes, the weekends are difficult after a breakup. I am getting ready to go thru this myself. Join some MeetUp groups that interest you get active, workout, read, do things with your friends. Get out of bed versus just laying there. Work on yourself...find the things that make you happy and do them, even if it's alone. Link to post Share on other sites
The Tallest One Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 I am struggling today as well! Just been spending the day on My iPhone surfing stupid dating sites! Argh, so not ready for dating but so lonely at the same time! I went to the gym today and didn't want to leave cause when I come home I'm miserable! Link to post Share on other sites
Lillygoose Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Been four months since BU, 50 days NC. and yes, weekends are for me the worst! I still love him and still think about him every second of the day. But then it passes when I think of him and his new misses and her child he is bringing up. I get this sickening feeling in my tummy!! I recently moved away from pretty much anyone i know to start afresh, job interviews next week! so hopefully meet people that way! But my apartment is beginning to be over clean! I am running out of things to do to take up my time! Link to post Share on other sites
coralie Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 All I've been able to watch for weeks are true crime TV shows (Investigation Discovery shows them 24/7), or Lifetime movies about "love that turns deadly." I'm not usually into this kind of stuff, but anything happy or romantic just makes me miserable. Hadn't thought of that as I'm not really into those types of shows either, but hey, I need something to watch. Thanks for the suggestion! I am struggling today as well! Just been spending the day on My iPhone surfing stupid dating sites! Argh, so not ready for dating but so lonely at the same time! I went to the gym today and didn't want to leave cause when I come home I'm miserable! You'll be in such great physical shape when you are ready to date again! I recently moved away from pretty much anyone i know to start afresh, job interviews next week! so hopefully meet people that way! But my apartment is beginning to be over clean! I am running out of things to do to take up my time! Good luck with interviews! A new job could be very positive and bring more motivation in your life. And I'm also living in probably the cleanest place in my entire city, so I understand there. Link to post Share on other sites
steveT95 Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 Yes! This weekend is going really tough, we only broke up yesterday and are still talking. It's a weekend when the house is empty except for me rattling around it. Normally she would come over for the weekend but now I'm alone. Link to post Share on other sites
RiceaRoni Posted March 29, 2013 Share Posted March 29, 2013 What helps me over the weekends is watching comedy movies or shows..to lift my spirits and get a good laugh haha and I'll play video games with my brother or with a friend.. Or go out with friends anywhere. Same with family. And sometimes when I want to be alone, I'll just walk around my neighborhood until my head clears...it helps a lot. Also sketching or drawing, painting,etc help too And since I'm in school homework definitely gets my mind off things Just some suggestions haha stay strong 3 Link to post Share on other sites
coralie Posted March 30, 2013 Share Posted March 30, 2013 And sometimes when I want to be alone, I'll just walk around my neighborhood until my head clears...it helps a lot. Just came back from a long walk an hour ago. I had headphones in with my music and it was nice out today, and you know what, it did help. Of course now that I'm back home I'm starting to feel that emptiness again, but it was good to get outside and take a break from that. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Damaged23 Posted March 30, 2013 Share Posted March 30, 2013 It's kind of the opposite for me. I'm a bartender so i work weekends and have the weekdays off. Right now, i'm not going to school, so i have Monday through Thursday off. The week is so hard for me!! Trying to get another job, and go back to school, but so far i'm lacking the desire to do either. :/ Link to post Share on other sites
Author Am4Real Posted March 30, 2013 Author Share Posted March 30, 2013 I hate weekends! Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted March 30, 2013 Share Posted March 30, 2013 All I've been able to watch for weeks are true crime TV shows (Investigation Discovery shows them 24/7), or Lifetime movies about "love that turns deadly." I'm not usually into this kind of stuff, but anything happy or romantic just makes me miserable. OMG.... Thats so strange!...Thats all I have been able to watch too!. Its truly amazing what the brain trains us to do...Its some kind of defense mechanism. All I can watch are those Forensic Files and mystery detective type shows..I did watch the original "Rocky" and I felt somewhat lifted and inspired...Too bad it wore off in about an hour afterwards. TFOY Link to post Share on other sites
singme2sleep Posted March 30, 2013 Share Posted March 30, 2013 OMG.... Thats so strange!...Thats all I have been able to watch too!. Its truly amazing what the brain trains us to do...Its some kind of defense mechanism. All I can watch are those Forensic Files and mystery detective type shows..I did watch the original "Rocky" and I felt somewhat lifted and inspired...Too bad it wore off in about an hour afterwards. TFOY Me too! The other night I tried to watch a movie that ended with the "happily ever after" cliche and I actually had the turn the tv off. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Compromize Posted March 30, 2013 Share Posted March 30, 2013 I have been dreading the weekends where I don't have my kids because I know my ex doesn't either and my mind wanders as to what she is doing Every car that drives by could be her showing up at my house, if I am out I fear seeing her with someone else. It sucks to do this to yourself. I did go out last night for the first time in a long time with some good friends and got picked up on and a woman asked for my number but I am just not ready for that. Told her and she said that was too bad but she understood. It was nice to get my mind off of the BU and her for a while though. My friends deserve some thanks for dragging me out, I didn't want to go and would have just stayed home otherwise. Link to post Share on other sites
RiceaRoni Posted March 30, 2013 Share Posted March 30, 2013 Just came back from a long walk an hour ago. I had headphones in with my music and it was nice out today, and you know what, it did help. Of course now that I'm back home I'm starting to feel that emptiness again, but it was good to get outside and take a break from that. I'm happy walking worked for you Coralie and I know what you mean about the emptiness...but we just gotta keep our minds busy and strong. We deserve to be happy and well rested from the things we've been through and staying busy with activities does that for us. Link to post Share on other sites
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