Our relationship is not the same and is changing for the worse

[Coco1]

Hi everyone. This is my first post but I have been reading a lot on the site and there is a lot of great information. Unfortunately, I think that my relationship is nearing an end if I don't do something about it.

 

 

I've been with my fiancee for 2 years and we have both talked about a lifelong relationship. She is the woman I would love to be with forever; however, things have been getting worse every month in many aspects: (ranging from arguments every day, impatience, lack of motivation, and a decrease in intimacy).

 

 

How can I try to prevent the constant arguments? I try to work through this but I feel like the more we argue the more of a disconnect there is.

 

 

Also, it seems like her motivation is diminished for being healthy and cleaning up after herself. In the past 2 years she has gained 40 lbs., hasn't change her eating habits and doesn't go to the gym all while complaining about her weight. I'm not trying to sound superficial but it is important to take care of your body. I thought if I started a healthy diet and going to the gym it would motivate her to try it as well but it hasn't. (Also, I have lost 5 lbs. in the past two years so I'm trying to be hypocritical).

 

 

Her room as well as car are always dirty and won't clean them (we're in college, we aren't living together yet). You can't walk in her room because there's so much stuff on the ground.

 

 

Last, our intimacy and sex life has taken a nose dive. I know the honeymoon stage will affect this but we went from having sex on average 5 times a week to once ever two weeks. Sex isn't everything and I want a meaningful relationship over sex but it is weird how drastic things have changed.

 

 

Thank you for reading this. For some reason I feel like a bad partner for saying these things but I want the relationship and partner I had back. I admit I have my flaws and I have been working on them but it is getting difficult to keep moving forward.

[lost_alone]

Sounds to me like you need a little adventure in your relationship. She is getting bored an doesnt feel she needs to try because of this. Best advice try being spontaneous take her out for a hike or long walk during a sunset or a place where you both love. Or if you remeber your first date try to reinact it. Show her why she fell in love with you an how fun you still can be. As for the intimacy if your always in the bedroom it can get boreing for some girl try to go out do it in a car in an abandoned parking lot go camping do it in a temt find somewjere more exciting and the thrill of possibly beig caught will make it better. I didnt think id like that sort of thing but once I tried it I love the thrill an it kept me and my partners sex life going for 4 years. We didnt break up due to that there was other reasons. I hope this helpsan that you two will be ok. All of this will help her get out of her rut an shell want to look her best for you once again