helena_bloom Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 hi my friend from college wanted something with me since the year has started(since we have met) but i had boyfriend and i always avoided being alone with him, telling him i don't want anything except friendship.. after half of year he gave up, we were hanging up rarely. recently,i broke up with bf, and few of us went out, and that friend too.. we had sex. after that, he calls me to come to his place. he didn't invite me to coffee or something like that. so what's the problem now? thought he wanted some kind of a relationship with me, not only sex.. i was wronged,i guess. what should i do? think i started liking him.. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 Since you're young, hanging out and casual sex are one fairly common option for peers. You hang out long enough and have sex often enough and you wake up one day being boyfriend and girlfriend. It evolves organically. Since you know him in a casual way, if you enjoy your encounters with him, continue that. See where it goes. Where did you have sex with him? Link to post Share on other sites
Author helena_bloom Posted March 31, 2013 Author Share Posted March 31, 2013 at friend's apartment.i was drunk,but he was sober Link to post Share on other sites
sweetheart5381 Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 hi my friend from college wanted something with me since the year has started(since we have met) but i had boyfriend and i always avoided being alone with him, telling him i don't want anything except friendship.. after half of year he gave up, we were hanging up rarely. recently,i broke up with bf, and few of us went out, and that friend too.. we had sex. after that, he calls me to come to his place. he didn't invite me to coffee or something like that. so what's the problem now? thought he wanted some kind of a relationship with me, not only sex.. i was wronged,i guess. what should i do? think i started liking him.. Well if he called you and invited you over, that's a sign that he is interested in you. If he just wanted one-time sex he wouldn't bother with you again. If he makes it clear that he just wants to have sex with no R and you are not ok with that then I would suggest forgetting him. Put your cards on the table, especially since it doesn't sound like there is a true "friendship" involved. Link to post Share on other sites
sweetheart5381 Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 at friend's apartment.i was drunk,but he was sober That's a bad sign... true gentlemen, sober gentlemen I mean, don't have sex with a drunk woman. The mitigating factor is whether or not he knew that you were drunk. If he wasn't aware that you were loaded, then it's not so bad. If he knew you were and took advantage of your inability to make a decision, then forget him. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelin Frisky Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 Ug. Alcohol is very problematic. If I'm reading this right and you were drunk whe you had sex but he wasn't, you weren't you. And he doesn't realize that. It happens a lot even without sex that people meet uder the influence, act like they are old friends, exchange numbers, then avoid answering the call at all costs because they don't recall the impressions they gave off when stoned and know that the sober them is not the stoned one. If you still kinda like him, (and I'm anywhere near understanding this correctly) you can be honest with him and start over--either on a date or meeting to se things right (no more drinking for a while, just make that a coffee or smoothie or w/e). But, again, if I'm reading this right, and you had sex with him, don't blame him for assuming you'd be into it again without being courted. He saw the inebriated you--not the real you, and you appealed to him. This can be fix if you want it, or ended it you don't. It's in your court. I didn't witness his behavior so I can't judge but every young guy hopes to get laid. Nothing strange about that. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 31, 2013 Share Posted March 31, 2013 at friend's apartment.i was drunk,but he was sober Suggest a public 'hangout' for your next interaction, if you are still interested. Drink less and see where it goes. Link to post Share on other sites
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