A short man is not equivalent to an overweight woman.

[AlexDP]

For me, the girl that I liked more than every girl before her, the one that I wanted to have for my girlfriend and meet my family, take to my cousins weddings, and have her be a part of my life, was 5'8, two inches taller than me.

 

Even after more than year of no contact, I still wonder if she would have dated me if I was 5'10 or taller.

 

You're Messi's size. You think she would have dated him?

[somedude81]

You're Messi's size. You think she would have dated him?

Maybe.

 

And I'm sure she would have dated me as well if I made 14 million a year.

[AlexDP]

Maybe.

 

And I'm sure she would have dated me as well if I made 14 million a year.

 

Then make 14 million a year.

[JuneJulySeptember]

My wife says she wouldn't be with anyone under 5'10". I HAVE asked her if she would have been with me if I was shorter (I'm 6'2") and she always gives me the "uhhhh...well......" and, you know what...I'm FINE with that.

 

Hell...I'm GOOD with that. I'm glad that I'm what my wife considers physically "optimal".

 

It has NOTHING to do with being open minded and EVERYTHING to do with knowing exactly what you want and being able to get it.

 

If my wife didn't look the way she did, I wouldn't be with her either, no matter how awesome her personality was.

 

Right. Exactly.

 

So, why does everybody here blast me again when I say it's all about looks and nothing else matters until after that matter is settled?

 

Hmmm...

[Mme. Chaucer]

And no you're telling me to talk about the mundane stuff, but with pepper.

 

I don't agree with TW's advice to you about conversing with women. Well, in theory I do, but it will never work in practice. You can't just decide to "talk about the mundane stuff" and have that = "getting a girlfriend." Not when you don't give a crap about the conversation, or even the person you're talking to other than in the context of maybe "getting" her.

 

You actually need to find a way to become interested in other people. ONLY those who are interested in other people (besides as something they hope to "get") actually have successful interactions with other people, excluding the extremely talented manipulative sociopathic types.

 

Not just girls, SD. PEOPLE.

[Treasa]

Right. Exactly.

 

So, why does everybody here blast me again when I say it's all about looks and nothing else matters until after that matter is settled?

 

Hmmm...

 

His wife doesn't represent everyone. I don't care about height. However, I'd never date SD. I'd date someone else if he had the qualities I liked, even if he was shorter than SD.

[ThaWholigan]

Right. Exactly.

 

So, why does everybody here blast me again when I say it's all about looks and nothing else matters until after that matter is settled?

 

Hmmm...

 

1. Because you enable people to use it as an excuse for their own failure to attract.

 

2. Looks are subjective to a large degree and while they matter, they vary in importance to individuals.

[AlexDP]

His wife doesn't represent everyone. I don't care about height. However, I'd never date SD. I'd date someone else if he had the qualities I liked, even if he was shorter than SD.

 

You mean "If I was taller I'd be a professional athlete getting free blowjobs by high class hookers, but instead I am small and hope I do not get my ass kicked by those mean 11 year old girls" does not get your panties wet?

[Mme. Chaucer]

 

So, why does everybody here blast me again when I say it's all about looks and nothing else matters until after that matter is settled?

 

 

Because, it's not "all about looks." Certainly the initial thing that gets people together is mutual attraction. Looks plays a part in that. But many, many other components come into play when it comes to attraction. Hence, you see plenty of short guys, fat guys, fat girls, sloppy looking guys, homely girls, old people, etc. who are happily with someone.

 

I can't understand how guys who evidently are of normal cognitive abilities can excuse themselves from sidestepping this truth over and over in favor of using the way they look, including their height, as the sole reason for their problems in forming relationships. It's just plain false.

[ThaWholigan]

I don't agree with TW's advice to you about conversing with women. Well, in theory I do, but it will never work in practice. You can't just decide to "talk about the mundane stuff" and have that = "getting a girlfriend." Not when you don't give a crap about the conversation, or even the person you're talking to other than in the context of maybe "getting" her.

 

You actually need to find a way to become interested in other people. ONLY those who are interested in other people (besides as something they hope to "get") actually have successful interactions with other people, excluding the extremely talented manipulative sociopathic types.

 

Not just girls, SD. PEOPLE.

Understood.

 

I just think he needs more of a life than he currently has personally.

[somedude81]

I don't agree with TW's advice to you about conversing with women. Well, in theory I do, but it will never work in practice. You can't just decide to "talk about the mundane stuff" and have that = "getting a girlfriend." Not when you don't give a crap about the conversation, or even the person you're talking to other than in the context of maybe "getting" her.

 

You actually need to find a way to become interested in other people. ONLY those who are interested in other people (besides as something they hope to "get") actually have successful interactions with other people, excluding the extremely talented manipulative sociopathic types.

But I am interested in girls and want to spend more time getting to know the ones that I enjoy being around. I much rather talk to a girl about herself, what she likes to do and so on. To find out out who she is.

Not just girls, SD. PEOPLE.

Oh, never mind then.

[AlexDP]

But I am interested in girls and want to spend more time getting to know the ones that I enjoy being around. I much rather talk to a girl about herself, what she likes to do and so on. To find out out who she is.

 

Oh, never mind then.

 

Girls also want to find out who you are. So who are you?

[Treasa]

SD, if you had 14 million dollars AND I had no morals, I'd use you for your money, but I still wouldn't love you or enjoy sex with you. So no, sorry, money wouldn't cure your woes, either.

 

I almost want to give you my number so that, someday, when you realize that you're the only one causing all your misery, you can call me so I can start to say, "I told you so," but then hold my tongue because I'm not that mean.

[somedude81]

His wife doesn't represent everyone. I don't care about height. However, I'd never date SD. I'd date someone else if he had the qualities I liked, even if he was shorter than SD.

Oh yeah, we'll I'd never date you you either, with your constantly judging eyes. You big meanie!

 

BTW Treasa, why wouldn't you date me?

 

And now stop for a minute, if we had met in person first instead of online, would those reasons still be valid?

[Mme. Chaucer]

 

I have always preferred at least a B cup.

 

 

You mean, like many women prefer a tall man?

 

I have never said that I would refuse to date a girl because I thought her breasts were too small.

 

You mean, like many women here say that they would not refuse to date a man (WHO THEY LIKED) because he was too short?

 

Though at this juncture I must remind you of your recent post regarding the small breasted girl who you tried and tried to like, but you could not - because of her boob size.

 

If I somehow ended up in a relationship with a girl who was an A or smaller, I would consider encouraging her to get implants.

 

And a wonderful girl - 'specially one who's about 22 years old, vivacious and fit, with small boobs won't choose to date a desperate fellow who is grudgingly willing to settle for her, when she can date men who will like her just the way she is. Seriously.

[somedude81]

Girls also want to find out who you are.

How often do you think girls ask me about myself?

 

For example if I ask a girl questions about herself, she asks me the same or similar questions?

 

100% of the time?

75%?

50%?

10%?

[Treasa]

Oh yeah, we'll I'd never date you you either, with your constantly judging eyes. You big meanie!

 

BTW Treasa, why wouldn't you date me?

 

And now stop for a minute, if we had met in person first instead of online, would those reasons still be valid?

 

I might like your personality upon first impression. I'm not sure. Depending on which picture you looked more like, I'd probably give you a chance or at least talk to you. It's sort of hard, because I DON'T know you in person, you know?

 

Maybe you should make a video for us.

 

And you know I'm not being mean. I wouldn't try this hard if I didn't care.

[AlexDP]

How often do you think girls ask me about myself?

 

For example if I ask a girl questions about herself, she asks me the same or similar questions?

 

100% of the time?

75%?

50%?

10%?

 

When girls see a guy they find intriguing they ask a million questions about him. Much much more than vice versa. I find that when a girl is interested in you, she wants to know everything about you.

 

In your case it's pretty obvious, you're a depressed dwarf. Perhaps you're good at tennis, but that would just make you an angry midget. Or at least that's how you present yourself. That is what you have chosen as your identity.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Because, it's not "all about looks." Certainly the initial thing that gets people together is mutual attraction. Looks plays a part in that. But many, many other components come into play when it comes to attraction. Hence, you see plenty of short guys, fat guys, fat girls, sloppy looking guys, homely girls, old people, etc. who are happily with someone.

 

I can't understand how guys who evidently are of normal cognitive abilities can excuse themselves from sidestepping this truth over and over in favor of using the way they look, including their height, as the sole reason for their problems in forming relationships. It's just plain false.

 

Even I admit there's exceptions to the rule.

 

I'm one of those people you are talking about. And I HAVE had girlfriends.

 

But you have to play by majority rules.

 

And most people have hard looks cutoffs.

 

So, for most people it's all about looks. That's really the only thing I've ever told guys here. And I don't see how it's far from the truth.

 

Treasa and Phoe are the only posters who come to mind who have said looks don't matter as much to them. You could throw my current GF in the mix. Or maybe she really thinks I'm hot. Who cares? I never asked her and really I never want to know.

 

So, am I wrong?

[somedude81]

You mean, like many women prefer a tall man?

 

 

 

You mean, like many women here say that they would not refuse to date a man (WHO THEY LIKED) because he was too short?

 

So far there seems to be more women who would adamantly refuse dating a short man or they are trying to be convinced to look over the guys height.

 

Though at this juncture I must remind you of your recent post regarding the small breasted girl who you tried and tried to like, but you could not - because of her boob size.

Are you talking about my post that I made in Star Gazers thread?!

 

 

 

And a wonderful girl - 'specially one who's about 22 years old, vivacious and fit, with small boobs won't choose to date a desperate fellow who is grudgingly willing to settle for her, when she can date men who will like her just the way she is. Seriously.

LOL what is that even supposed to mean?

[clia]

If I somehow ended up in a relationship with a girl who was an A or smaller, I would consider encouraging her to get implants. I would not bring it up, but if it was her idea, I would completely support her. All of that would only happen if I by chance I ended up in a relationship with a woman who was much smaller than average. Since I'm the one who has to actually do the pursuing, odds are it won't happen. As I said before, I need to be attracted to a girl to actually chase her. Why make the effort if I don't want the prize?

 

I see. So you are allowed to choose what kind of woman you want to pursue based on "shallow" qualities such as weight and breast size, but if a woman who you pursue rejects you because of a "shallow" quality such as your height, then she is in the wrong? I just want to make sure I'm understanding the full extent of the hypocrisy.

[AlexDP]

SD's anger reminds me of Gimli..

[fortyninethousand322]

You know SD, there is one good lesson you should learn from this: you need to stop caring and stop worrying about other people. I guess some women are going to not like short men, but, those women are the ones who aren't worth your time. Curse them (in your mind or in a diary somewhere), hold a grudge against them, hate them, etc., but don't make them represent every woman in the world.

 

In the meantime, I think you need to start worrying about #1. If you want to date some girl, ask her out pretty early on, like 20 minutes into meeting her. Selfishness is really going to get you more points than not. And I mean open selfishness, not selfishness where you appear to be selfless. Don't play that game.

[somedude81]

I might like your personality upon first impression. I'm not sure. Depending on which picture you looked more like, I'd probably give you a chance or at least talk to you. It's sort of hard, because I DON'T know you in person, you know?

Clever girl.

 

You saw the reasoning in my post.

 

Yes, if you met in person, you wouldn't know the things about me that you do know. A few pages back Jane wrote a post about hiding your insecurities. And that is exactly what I do.

 

Maybe you should make a video for us.

I'd love to.

 

When are you free? Should I use a tripod or just hold it myself?

 

And you know I'm not being mean. I wouldn't try this hard if I didn't care.

Thanks for caring, TrerBear.

[Divasu]

AlexD is cracking me up...

 

SD, to answer your question from before, the answer is "somewhat". I've had it used on me many times. Saying you have a David Bowie poster on your wall wasn't "pick-upyish" in a negative way, it was cute/funny in response to TW's comment.