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Afraid to get hurt again


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My boyfriend broke up with me about a month ago out of nowhere. The way he did it was horrible. He treated me like I was nothing to him. And he truly hurt me. Now hes saying he made a huge mistake and that he wants me back. Im confused because I love him and would love to be with him but Im so afraid hes going to hurt me again. Should I take him back and risk the chance of getting dumped again? My heart is telling me to be with him but something else in my head is saying dont do it. Any advice?

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How long were you two going out? If he treated you like nothing, that is pretty harsh. He will likely do it again. Did you ever find out why he dumped you? Was it another girl? If it was, it means he thought he found someone better then realized it was not gonna work, so he is came back to ol' faithful, (you) because he knows you will always be there no matter what he does. (I could be wrong about that.) I can't give you a better answer unless you give me more info.

 

Chris

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We were together for 2 years. When we broke up he told me that he needed some time to figure out what he wanted. He wasnt really sure what he wanted in his life. Now hes saying I know what I want and I want you. You are the only one for me. HE thinks that he was scared of how much he really cared about me. He has never felt this way for anyone and it freaked him out. Is this BS lines?

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He is 26 and I am assuming you are about the same age. I guess there's no other way to tell someone they are breaking up unless they do it like that. He did not give any signs? At least he gave you a reason. It is a legitimate reason. You should be understanding, he has been honest with you. I know it probably hurt when he did that, so be careful. Does he tell you he loves you? Find that out first. Tell him how much he hurt you to break up like that. Ask him questions like why does he want you, etc. Make sure that what he really wants is you and he gets no more chances, your heart is fragile.

 

Chris

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Definitely need more info on this one. If there is OW or children involved are if this a long distance thing, etc. But just off what you said, how he treated you wrong, it's understandable that your insecure with trusting him again. It's very hard to maintain any relationship without trust. To be willing to give yourself to him, means you are willing to risk again. Whether or not your want to take this risk is solely your choice. You know what he means to you. You know what happened, what you deserve etc. Look at the entire picture of things and go from there. All people make mistakes and he very well could have handled the breakup differently. However, for most, "you don't know what you've got until it's gone" and maybe he needed this to happen.

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We are both fresh out of college and I was ready to settle down. He always said he was too. I totally understand why he did it. I was hurt but I understand. People just need breakups sometimes. I think it was like a wake up call for him. I just feel like I need proof or some kind of something from him to make me feel more secure. I am just so scared but I do love him and want to be with him. I gave my whole heart to him. I was planning on spending the rest of my life with him. Its like I'm damned if I do or damned if I dont. If I go back I will always feel scared like he might hurt me again and If I dont I will always be thinking what if I would have? What if he really was the one and I didnt go back?

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It's always good to take risks like that. The only things in life you regret,

are the risks that you didnt take. Don't let it pass you by....

 

Chris

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