Confusedaboutmybrain Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 Hi, Me and my ex have not been together for nearly 2 years. I am currently in a loving long distance relationship (I live in UK, he lives in America) and we all have an agreement about me seeing the ex for "relief". Me and the ex were together for nearly 8 years. During that time I did kiss someone else (which he knew about and took me back). About 3/4 years ago, I had sex with someone else which he doesn't know about. It's been playing on my mind recently, and I'm debating if I should tell him or not. There are other things that have happened, that the ex knew about (like flirting with people behind his back) but if I tell him about this, I will lose him as a friend. I'm so conflicted at the minute and I don't know what to do.
Author Confusedaboutmybrain Posted April 2, 2013 Author Posted April 2, 2013 (edited) Would just like to add, the current boyfriend knows everything about what has happened in my past and everything I have done, and I don't plan on making the same mistake again. I am always open and honest with him, which he has helped me to become. Edited April 2, 2013 by Confusedaboutmybrain
Maggotface Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 Why are you keeping your ex as a friend to begin with? Is your current boyfriend okay with you keeping your ex in your life? I don't see a point in digging up the past your ex has most likely moved on with his life, there is no need to bring anything up that you did in the past you and him are no longer together or will be together in the future.
chelsea2011 Posted April 2, 2013 Posted April 2, 2013 Tell you ex what? He's your ex...you don't owe him an explanation about anything. Especially since you haven't been together for two years.
WhoreyBull Posted April 5, 2013 Posted April 5, 2013 I don't see the point. It worries me because thinking like that makes me believe you might have some more-than-just-friends left in you. Feeling the need to drag up old pain, to rip open fresh wound that'll need to scab over. To risk it all just to have your conscious clear over something that happened so long ago? That means you really value him... Friends usually don't value each other quite this much... couples do though.
Holyoak Posted April 9, 2013 Posted April 9, 2013 I don't think you are relationship material to be honest. And your boyfriend is a wimp for being a doormat to your dishonesty and cheating. You need to see a therapist to find out the root cause to your impulsivity. I agree, this whole dynamic seems way to weird.
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