New here and ..someone shed some light?

[ACKCC]

Hello all,

 

I am new here and I'm hoping that someone can shed some light. Here's my story..

I was approached by a acquaintance, who was telling me about how hes not happy with his sex life at home -- he and his wife only have sex about once a month BC hes not sexually attracted to her. Well he finally says so what im trying to say is when are we gonna hang out? I said hell no originally, but then after thinking about what he was saying and how immensely attracted to him I am, and how something just 'clicked' I agreed to it.. Well, I found us talking about how we were going to start this with no strings attached, and no feelings involved (but in the same sentence he tells me how emotionally attached he gets very easily). Its been about a two months now, and we see each other 1x a week, and we make small talk almost everyday even if its just to say have a good day or have a good night. I love it when im with him, we always have a blast and the chemistry is amazing....only thing is now im confused, because I don't know if hes starting to get emotionally involved b/c he says things like he misses me, or he cant wait to see me...and he told me if i was going to start something like this with someone else that he would stop seeing me ? but then again says were only friends with benefits and nothing more... I need to know where this is going because i really like him...hes opened up to me about his life, and he is so comfortable with me..he begged me to come to the hotel he was staying at with his friend BC he missed me and i went and stayed the night with him (No cuddling tho) hes weird with that. Hes giving me so many mixed signals and its driving me crazy! I think im starting to get emotionally involved, and I don't want to be wasting my time....i guess im looking for some opinions ...

Thanks

[hannah11]

He has a wife. There is nothing you can do. Getting emotionally attached is very very bad in this situation. If he is having problems with his wife at home then he needs to sort those out and figure out what he is doing there before he begins another relationship, no strings attached or not. I'm sorry, I know how it can be...I'm actually still getting over the same exact situation. Only I never let it get to the sex part. I just got over emotionally attached.

[Vogeltron]

He needs to deal with his life at home with his wife. You being with him is just giving him an escape. Sooner or later he has to deal with it. I hate to say it but he is using you. You may have a great connection and very well could be perfect for each other. But he needs to deal with his situation at home. Then whatever happens happens. Until then I can assure you that you are just wasting you time and will never have the complete relationship you desire.

[TaraMaiden]

You're wasting your time even talking to him.

 

This is an Emotional Affair, tentatively leading up to a physical affair.

He wants a mistress, and you would be the other woman and instrumental in his cheating and lying to his wife.

 

All you know about his wife is what he tells you.

 

Believe me, some of the greatest liars and manipulators will paint their spouses in the worst light possible in order to get sex and sympathy.

 

There's a poster currently who discovered that everything her lover said about his wife was completely untrue.

 

if you are comfortable with being a No-Strings-attached 'mistress' and don't have any reason personally to not get involved, then just go along with what's happening, and deal with it.

 

But if you really don't feel that the whole scene is your bag, get up, walk away and don't look back.

 

And please, don't come back with crap like "well, the only thing is...." or "Yes but, when he says".... or "Well he told me that...." because it's all bunkum, avoidance and too much analysis.

The fact is, he wants to phukk someone outside his marriage, and that someone COULD be you.

 

But maybe not exclusively, and maybe not as honestly as you think.