zanzi Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 aaaah. still live with your parents. that explains a lot. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 aaaah. still live with your parents. that explains a lot. Pretty much. Ok how old are you just wondering?? Link to post Share on other sites
ses Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 CHILL with the histrionics. You're a lovely and intelligent young woman who needs to reevaluate the priorities in her life. Nothing would repel me more from a guy than if he were the author of this thread. No person can be one's savior. I'm single and 24 as previously stated. I ended my first relationship last December. It was short-term, long-distance but worth my time because I valued the experience. Sure, I cried, but then I moved on with life. I have never understood individuals who lived and breathed their significant others since it's always sounded so overwhelming. I'm enjoying my free time and trying to make the most of it. I love my privacy and alone time. I still am maturing and have a lot to learn. Relationships are more than physical affection. It's not always roses. A committed relationship takes time and effort to cultivate. You need to be open to disagreement, to prioritizing the needs of your partner, to making compromises on issues, and to NOT losing your sense of individuality. Fulfill your own needs first because nobody can compensate for your own insecurities. Don't settle for the first guy who makes googly eyes at you. Understand what you want, and then be secure that there is a guy who can meet those expectations. As far as marriage and children go, don't rush the process. Enjoy your life and having the freedom it entails. Marriage and children are more responsibility than you can imagine. Stop watching fairytales. A best friend of mine is pregnant. She's fortunate that she has a job, a place to live and a loving fiancé but I can't imagine having a child at our age. Children are a blessing, and I want them, but I can wait until I'm financially secure and committed to someone. It's not healthy to expect a another person to be your all. That's too much pressure. Have some self-respect for yourself. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
zanzi Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 Pretty much. Ok how old are you just wondering?? moi? Why I am a young and nubile 21 year old women who would put art school and my career before any man, even if it was Johnny Depp naked smeared in scented oil plus a slightly younger Kate Moss as a side dish. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 moi? Why I am a young and nubile 21 year old women who would put art school and my career before any man, even if it was Johnny Depp naked smeared in scented oil plus a slightly younger Kate Moss as a side dish. You have a boyfriend though don't you? Link to post Share on other sites
Treasa Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 moi? Why I am a young and nubile 21 year old women who would put art school and my career before any man, even if it was Johnny Depp naked smeared in scented oil plus a slightly younger Kate Moss as a side dish. I love this post. Zanzi has got it so right. Link to post Share on other sites
zanzi Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 that is irrelevant. In fact I do, but I would actually die of annoyance if he and I didn't spend some time apart now and then I would go mad. we need alone time as much as we want each other. We argue. He says dumb things and I do to. This morning he woke up, smiled widely at me, and did a giant fart. He also woke me up by yelling "wake up!" repeatedly in my ear until I awoke. It was nor cute, cuddly or lovely. Relationships aren't always. having a boyfriend if not my whole life, ok. Its just a part. a great part but not one that comes easy. mmmm. Kate moss naked. homina homina. Link to post Share on other sites
Treasa Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 You have a boyfriend though don't you? She has a boyfriend BECAUSE she's not needy or clingy. Let me illustrate: My mom has always been the toughest person I've ever known. Her confidence is rock-solid. I, on the other hand, used to be extremely sensitive and emotional. My mom would tell a guy to basically piss off if he did something she didn't like. She ALWAYS has men after her, but she just doesn't feel like it anymore, and hasn't in a long time. I, on the other hand, tried so very very hard to be a good girlfriend. The one who, if treated poorly, would redouble her efforts and be even more amazing. And you know what it got me? MORE DUMPING. And it left me completely drained. I live my life for me. That's what people find attractive. Happy people who are engaged in their own lives. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 this is a lost cause. You sound more like a sixteen year old girl then a women my age. Actually, more like 7 or 8 year old girl. Except the sex part. I think even young teens, though they may gripe and throw tantrums, already realize that they're not going to get their fantasies realized. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 that is irrelevant. In fact I do, but I would actually die of annoyance if he and I didn't spend some time apart now and then I would go mad. we need alone time as much as we want each other. We argue. He says dumb things and I do to. This morning he woke up, smiled widely at me, and did a giant fart. He also woke me up by yelling "wake up!" repeatedly in my ear until I awoke. It was nor cute, cuddly or lovely. Relationships aren't always. having a boyfriend if not my whole life, ok. Its just a part. a great part but not one that comes easy. mmmm. Kate moss naked. homina homina. Ok but you are 21, with a boyfriend so how can you like tell me how I shouldn't have one? I know I am clingy, it happens I'm working on it but you have a boyfriend who you live with or spend a great deal of time with at least. If your bf dumped you tomorrow how would you react? If I so easily got a boyfriend I wouldn't have problems, my life is honestly not super problem filled beyond this, I would be perfectly fine and have an awesome life if this worked out. I know it shouldn't be my be all end all but like it is kind of important, I have accomplished school pretty easily and so of course I am going to wonder what next. Does that makes sense? I am not jumping down your throat but the point is you're 21 with a boyfriend and I'm 22 trying extremely hard to get one so what you say to me is like kind of difficult for me to take because you have what I don't and I can't fully relate to you. No offense. Link to post Share on other sites
Treasa Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 One side note about my mom that I did not fully realize about my mom and me until last year. My mom doesn't care what anyone thinks of her. And TONS of people love her. I mean, she's friends with everyone. It's almost laughable that she knows so many freaking people, but doesn't really care what any of them think of her. It's pretty circular thinking, because I would want people to like me, and I would try harder and harder to get people to like me, and....yeah. LOL Some lessons you just don't learn until you've had enough experience. I think that's why older people say their lives get better as time goes on, even as their youthful beauty fades away. You just stop worrying about the stupid **** after a while, unless you're really messed up. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 One side note about my mom that I did not fully realize about my mom and me until last year. My mom doesn't care what anyone thinks of her. And TONS of people love her. I mean, she's friends with everyone. It's almost laughable that she knows so many freaking people, but doesn't really care what any of them think of her. It's pretty circular thinking, because I would want people to like me, and I would try harder and harder to get people to like me, and....yeah. LOL Some lessons you just don't learn until you've had enough experience. I think that's why older people say their lives get better as time goes on, even as their youthful beauty fades away. You just stop worrying about the stupid **** after a while, unless you're really messed up. I always thought I would stop caring what people thought of me when I got older and in college and I still care a ton, I won't go sit in the library alone because I think people think I'm a loser (I actually did sit there one time because I really needed to finish a paper but I haven't been back sense) I don't ever sit alone, if I don't have someone to go with me to places like concerts, games, library, I won't go. I don't like being alone it makes me feel like a loser and then other people probably think I'm a loser too. That is why I was soooo happy to have the guy I was/am with because we planned all this ****.. stuff I would never do if he wasn't around to do it with me and now I am not going to do it. Link to post Share on other sites
zanzi Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 well of course it would upset me, but I would eventually get over it. the sky wouldn't fall tomorrow (unless north Korea pushes the button and blows us all up by then.) Iv'e been thinking if that happens, I'd probably explore my bisexual fantasy of dating a slightly older women. Im talking late twenties. I would also love to join the army. I'd like to holiday in Japan and teach english to the cute little japanese kiddies. I'd grow my hair out and get black and purple dreadlocks. I could do heaps, really. Indeed, I doubt you could relate to such things. As none of them involve a boy. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Treasa Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 If your bf dumped you tomorrow how would you react? I can't speak for others, but I would wonder if he suddenly had brain damage, or if he was really that stupid all along and I just didn't realize it. I'm awesome. Anyone who doesn't see that isn't smart enough for me to be with. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Treasa Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 I always thought I would stop caring what people thought of me when I got older and in college and I still care a ton, I won't go sit in the library alone because I think people think I'm a loser (I actually did sit there one time because I really needed to finish a paper but I haven't been back sense) I don't ever sit alone, if I don't have someone to go with me to places like concerts, games, library, I won't go. I don't like being alone it makes me feel like a loser and then other people probably think I'm a loser too. That is why I was soooo happy to have the guy I was/am with because we planned all this ****.. stuff I would never do if he wasn't around to do it with me and now I am not going to do it. God, you're still a baby at 22. You may be older than you were before, but you aren't really "older." As in, you really aren't an adult yet. Know what makes life fun? Saying **** it to things that don't matter. Things that do matter to me are family/friends/work. Everything else can piss off. I just changed my voicemail about half an hour ago to, "Hi, this is Traci. If you're trying to sell me something or are doing research, you will be summarily destroyed." I mean, who the **** cares?? Other people are just other people. They aren't mythical beings on pedestals, and they certainly aren't better than you, nor do they have more worth than you do. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 I don't get how my little brother can stay with his major clingy girlfriend for almost 2 years and I messed up 1 time by just asking him for a little more time and I get the boot. I honestly talked to him a little today and asked about whats going on and he didn't respond and now I am just going to say **** these papers, **** this class tomorrow, **** my phone, **** my life, I'm over it. I'm going to bed. Link to post Share on other sites
Drseussgrrl Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 I don't get how my little brother can stay with his major clingy girlfriend for almost 2 years and I messed up 1 time by just asking him for a little more time and I get the boot. I honestly talked to him a little today and asked about whats going on and he didn't respond and now I am just going to say **** these papers, **** this class tomorrow, **** my phone, **** my life, I'm over it. I'm going to bed. Why don't you say f*ck HIM and choose yourself for once? Link to post Share on other sites
ses Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 Stop trying so damn hard to find a boyfriend. Guys like independent thinkers who are not so consumed by them. Nobody has the energy to put up with that. Excessive declarations of love and devotion can scare the s--- out of anyone because it puts pressure on someone to be everything for you. That's unfair and narcisstic of you to want it. That's what makes you unattractive as a potential girlfriend. Your relationship should be part of your life; it should enhance, not detract from any aspect. Settle and pursue your own interests. Trust me. Most of my family and friends are settled and in relationships. Sure, people have gotten on my case about finding a boyfriend but I'm content with my situation. I don't understand why people make it a big deal if you're with someone or single. Yes, I like someone currently; we'll see if it works out. If not, I'll be really bummed of course, but rejection is normal. I'll go for my usual ice cream and chat with my girlfriends...that's it. Stop searching for men. Have fun, and enjoy being 22. You'll find guys when the time is right. Relax!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 Why don't you say f*ck HIM and choose yourself for once? Idk, I should. Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 How about a mosquito farm? I wouldn't be bothered if someone let one of those die. Noooo! A person incapable of taking proper care of them would let them lose in your neighborhood, unleashing an unstoppable mosquito plague. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Sanitarium Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 I don't agree with the nonsense in this thread. OP is perfectly right here and she's dating somebody who doesn't really seem to care about her If I had a girlfriend, I would be with her 3-4 times a week at the very least and show a hell of a lot more affection and enthusiasm for her than OP's man is Just another case of a guy who doesn't really deserve a girlfriend somehow still finding somebody who is far too good for him Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 Idk, I should. I have a challenge for you. It's off topic, but sort of pertinent. I challenge you to ONLY write here like you are an adult peer of the other people posting on your threads. That means, no more "Idk," no more "like, ew, gross" or ANY of that. You want to be taken seriously as a woman, or is it more fun to keep acting like a young child and then reporting the posters who call you on it? People are seriously trying to talk to you about your problems here, and on all your threads - and you don't even show the respect of responding. You just go on with the Idk I wanna baby I'm jealous my life sux I'm gonna die. Endless loop. Same every thread. Anyway, will you accept my challenge? Communicate like an adult, or at least a reasonable high schooler? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 Noooo! A person incapable of taking proper care of them would let them lose in your neighborhood, unleashing an unstoppable mosquito plague. It's not even funny anymore... I am not retarded I know how to take care of things, I have been a baby sitter and no I haven't kept kids for more than a few hours but still. If I had a responsibility to something I could handle it, if I had a dog I would take care of it (I don't like animals and if I get a dog it has to only be a cute puppy that doesn't grow, I actually looked at a breeder nearby she has super cute little dogs) I am not stupid I can take care of things. I obviously am slightly responsible because I made it through 4 years of college, I used to have a job which I was good at, and I have interned at like 3 different places and have always been reliable. I can take care of business when need be. Link to post Share on other sites
SmileFace Posted April 9, 2013 Share Posted April 9, 2013 I don't agree with the nonsense in this thread. OP is perfectly right here and she's dating somebody who doesn't really seem to care about her If I had a girlfriend, I would be with her 3-4 times a week at the very least and show a hell of a lot more affection and enthusiasm for her than OP's man is Just another case of a guy who doesn't really deserve a girlfriend somehow still finding somebody who is far too good for him Did you read any part of this thread FFS? Link to post Share on other sites
Author ImperfectionisBeauty Posted April 9, 2013 Author Share Posted April 9, 2013 I have a challenge for you. It's off topic, but sort of pertinent. I challenge you to ONLY write here like you are an adult peer of the other people posting on your threads. That means, no more "Idk," no more "like, ew, gross" or ANY of that. You want to be taken seriously as a woman, or is it more fun to keep acting like a young child and then reporting the posters who call you on it? People are seriously trying to talk to you about your problems here, and on all your threads - and you don't even show the respect of responding. You just go on with the Idk I wanna baby I'm jealous my life sux I'm gonna die. Endless loop. Same every thread. Anyway, will you accept my challenge? Communicate like an adult, or at least a reasonable high schooler? Ok, I can do that. I have never reported you btw. Link to post Share on other sites
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