too soon

[tastee4u]

my boyfriend and i have been dating for nine months. He talks about having a kid. I have two kids already. I want to give him a child. Is it to soon or should we wait?

[Tony T]

You don't say how old you are or how old your children are...but I would think that at this time another child could truly burden your relationship.

 

The two of you ought to get to know each other better and be very sure he will be around for a very long time so you don't end up with three children and no father around for them.

 

There's plenty of time for having children. Give yourself a break and give the two you have some real good quality time...and your boyfriend as well...before you have another child. Let him know you will be quite willing...at the right time.

[Nic]

it's all very well to say you would love another child, but there are a few factors you and your boyfriend should consider first:

 

1. can you afford it financially?

 

2. can you afford it emotionally?

 

3. will it put a strain on this relatively new relationship?

 

i don't know how old you guys are, but i think you should spend a lot more time together and enjoy each other before jumping into another committment. the relationship is still in it's early phases, and even though you love each other very much, it's not enough time spent together to know 100% that you are ready for this.

 

if you can see him as part of yours and your children's future, then there is absolutely no hurry. as you already know, children are a huge responsibility, and it's not a matter of him just simply "wanting a child of my own".

 

if he loves you enough, tell him to wait. because it would be very heartbreaking for you and your children if you did have another child soon, and things didn't work out with your partner because they weren't properly thought through.

 

all good things come to those who wait.

my boyfriend and i have been dating for nine months. He talks about having a kid. I have two kids already. I want to give him a child. Is it to soon or should we wait?

[Deejette]

Also, it might be a good thing if he promised that he would stick around for the entire lifetime of that child. It is very romantic to think of creating a child with a person, but is he willing to buy the shoes, school clothes, go to parent/teacher meetings, take him/her to sports practice, and be a real dad?

it's all very well to say you would love another child, but there are a few factors you and your boyfriend should consider first: 1. can you afford it financially? 2. can you afford it emotionally? 3. will it put a strain on this relatively new relationship? i don't know how old you guys are, but i think you should spend a lot more time together and enjoy each other before jumping into another committment. the relationship is still in it's early phases, and even though you love each other very much, it's not enough time spent together to know 100% that you are ready for this. if you can see him as part of yours and your children's future, then there is absolutely no hurry. as you already know, children are a huge responsibility, and it's not a matter of him just simply "wanting a child of my own".

 

if he loves you enough, tell him to wait. because it would be very heartbreaking for you and your children if you did have another child soon, and things didn't work out with your partner because they weren't properly thought through.

 

all good things come to those who wait.

[cj]

Also, it might be a good thing if he promised that he would stick around for the entire lifetime of that child. It is very romantic to think of creating a child with a person, but is he willing to buy the shoes, school clothes, go to parent/teacher meetings, take him/her to sports practice, and be a real dad?

one question for you why dont you marry first?

 

it would be much easier for you