1knight Posted September 15, 2004 Share Posted September 15, 2004 Okay...no way to be any shorter w/this...so here goes. I'm 33 she's 24. We dated for a couple of weeks, but she was sleeping with other guys so I broke it off. Then she got pregnant. Im still her friend, and so when the dickhead sperm donor told her to get an abortion, and broke off all contact with her, I stepped in to help w/chores, giving her attention, being a friend. We ended up sleeping together, and now (it's been about 3 weeks) Im over at her house virtually every night. I dont just go over or invite myself...she asks me over. When we are alone we act like bf/gf, but in public she treats me like a friend only...no affection at all. I asked her about this...mostly because her family likes me and are allways making comments about me being her bf, or being good together. So she says she doesnt know, dont know, dont know. Her best friend asked her the other day if we were bf'gf, she gave the party line...dont know...well, her friend says, can you see other people, she says...you guessed it, she doesnt know. I know, I know, Im being too available, being a doormat, giving her all the benifits w/o the comittment, but here's the deal. She doesnt take money...even though she's now unemployed...she's gonna get evicted, and of course, she's preggers. I honestly love her, and will just be a friend if thats what she wants...but how can I know if she's just scared (her fiance died a couple of years ago...abandonment issues?) and overwhelmed and to hang in there for her, or if she's complacent with this relationship. Im such a sucker, Ill just keep being strung along thinking she'll come around. Thats what her family says to me...she loves me and will come around. Whaddya think? Link to post Share on other sites
dnm1010 Posted September 16, 2004 Share Posted September 16, 2004 her fiance died shes pregnant i dont even want to know what is going on through her head i think you are a very good person to stick with her at a time like this- many poeple would run i think she cares abtou you but needs time... it took me about 2 months to agree to be with my boyfriend and an additional 3 months to warm up to him and now everything is amazing ( i did not see other men)... some poeple are slower than others in getting in a relationship- but im sure it will be well worth it. best of luick and keep us posted. Link to post Share on other sites
1knight Posted September 20, 2004 Share Posted September 20, 2004 Thank you for the response. An update. We left town for the weekend, went to the circus, hung out...just us 2. Had a blast. All seems to be going well. Im not gonna go anywhere...just not wanting to be to available as to push her away. Link to post Share on other sites
dnm1010 Posted September 21, 2004 Share Posted September 21, 2004 i think its good to build your friendship because a good friendship is the base of a good relationship. the more time you spend together the better. i mean when you get married (if you do) then you will be wiht each other every wakign moment... u need to marry somone who you want to spend every wakign moment with. best of luck and keep us posted Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts