Future Mother in Law Hates Me?

[HonestNeurotic]

I don't get along with my mother in law either. She's not a "bad" person. But she stepped outta line one too many times over something that I never did/said, and well, that was IT!

 

Now, my husband and I have no children together. In fact, he never had any. So it was much easier to cut her off. However, I did not find the need to cut my husband off from his mother. Yeah, he's her favorite and can do no wrong. Ahem. Ahem. Ahem. Everyone that knows her understands that she's difficult. Me, life is too short and I don't do anything at ALL to make her life miserable, so when she started with this vitriolic diatribe, over and above any snarky comments or anything as she had made in the past - well, I said DONE. I. Am. Done.

 

So I don't go to family dinners. Funny, cuz I was the only daughter in law that faithfully went to all her little family functions that she planned. If she wants to come over here, then she needs to call so that I can leave. IF that's convenient. It is MY home, after all.

 

I don't get along with my parents all that well either. Opinionated hypocrites. But I do what I can to make sure that they are both okay, cuz that's what families do. We don't get to decide who we are born into in life. But I won't let them walk all over me either.

 

For whatever reason - my mother in law feels that whatever I do in my daily life I am doing just for the sole purpose of MAKING HER MISERABLE. But it's not ME, it's her. Cuz before ME, it was any one of the others that her sons were married to or in a ltr with.

 

My husband is very aware of his parents shortcomings. But no way would I have even asked him to "stand up for me". It helps that there are no CHILDREN involved. I stress that as if you are going to have children with this man, that changes the dynamics.

 

I would also caution against living/getting married with a person that has never LIVED ALONE for at least a year of their adult life.

 

I don't interfere with my children's relationships. The best sign to me that I did a decent job of raising other humans is that they are able to decide how to live their own lives without my help.

 

I know that you have broken it off - - - but these things are not always cut and dried........