wife left cant get over it

[messedup]

long story short my wife started an affair back in january, recently approxamatly 3 mths ago she took off with him to mexico, she said she wanted to "visit her family" i never let her come back but i havent been able to stop thinking about her. i really loved her but couldnt go through with another let down like her leaving unfortunatly now i believe that i really miss her i might just be feeling lonely but i miss her nonetheless.

 

we have talked online since she left usually just argue and she kept saing that she made a big mistake and misses and loves me all the time its probably a mind game i dont know what her game is.

 

after this happening is it absurd to still want her to come home, should i give into my heart or listen to my head and try to get over this and not talk to her. i dont know i just need some advice and some strength this has been the most diffucult time in my life, telling my wife no dont come home there is alot more to it if you have any questions ask me.

[aFighter]

It's not the same magnitude but my ex gf of 2yrs left me for what I thought was a close friend back in june. They were married 2 months later.

I haven't spoken to her [gave her stuff to a friend that came by to pick it up] since and I don't care if I ever do. They're living in another county now.

Even if she dumped him and came crawling back I'd be on my best not to let my sister beat 7 kinds of crap out of her as I cannot being a guy as I told her exactly where to go.

She left, she walked away. She does not deserve to be in my life again - period.

[cateinaus]

First of all, change your name to...gee, err, how about IMSTRONG or SURVIVOR. Nah just kidding, but you will get there. It's hard for you I know but I think if you let her back you may have the exact same thing happen to you again. Wouldn't it be beautiful to KNOW you can trust your partner, no question about it! Move on, feel the loneliness, don't be afraid of it, embrace it and know it won't last. Pretty soon you will find a new love and be glad that you held out. My thoughts are with you mate.

 

aFighter.......good on you!

[messedup]

what is messed up is i know all this but why do i feel so freakin lousy anybone got a clue how i can get over this she is like an arms reach online and i cant resist talking to her i am always saying to myself "what if" please help, i feel better than when all of this happened but i cant stop think about her she tells me "will you let me come home " if i didnt mention this already thanks for any info or well needed strength

sorry for the ongoing sentence didnt feel like using punctuation

[Butchey]

Man,

 

 

I feel your pain. I was in your shoes a few years ago. I tried everything and nothing worked. I wasted alot of time beating myself up over the affair. What you need to do is look at yourself. You are probably depressed so you need to see someone. I know alot of people don't like therapy but it is one of the best ways to start improving your life. You need to grieve because it is like somebody you love died. You'll have denial, anger and all sorts of other feelings but you will come to acceptance someday and you will find yourlife is a whole lot better without her.

 

 

My ex ran out on me and it took me a long time just to realize I had to do something, anything. As long as I sat still my life was not improving. So, go easy on yourself. You didn't take off, she did. You are a better person than she is. After time you'll see how strong you are. And someday you will find someone who appreciates you for you. True love is about someones inside, not what they can give us. You give 100% and she gives 100%. Nothing better than that. That's the good stuff.