applemilk Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 So, I know this may sound ridiculous. I had a one night stand with a guy I knew in Europe in summer 2011. It was the second time I cheated on my boyfriend since 2009 (the first was a longer sort of affair at the start of our relationship with an abusive person). My boyfriend and I have been together through it all for 4.5 years, and with my 18-20-year-old behavior behind me, and my committed future in front of me, I want to know a rather silly question. The europe guy and I watched a favorite children's movie of mine that I still like to this day. It happened to be just before the cheating took place. Is it okay for me to still like this movie? Can I watch it again? If I never tell my boyfriend, could I watch it around him? The cheating has permanently barred me from an entire country, but should I be banning myself from a childhood classic due to a nasty association? Can I give it a new association? Link to post Share on other sites
man_in_the_box Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 Are you a sociopath? You've cheated on your boyfriend of 4.5 years twice and instead of wondering how that is going to affect your relationship you're worried that you cannot enjoy some movie anymore? This might sound harsh but I'm actually just curious - don't you understand how relationships work? 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Toddbt12y1 Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 It sounds like no empathy OP. What? Will the movie make you feel guilty? It should. I doubt it. You clearly have written off your cheating as age related (18-20). You were old enough to know better then to cheat. You sound like "once a cheater always a cheater" type. Poor Guy...he'll end up wasting more years of his life...or catch something. You may have stopped now...but I. Can tell...you will again... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
toddles92 Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 I honestly don't think you deserve to watch something you once enjoyed, let alone be with your boyfriend. Cheating isn't age related, it's based on your core morals as a human being, and you worrying more about the negative connotations that a movie will have on you and not the fact that you cheated on the man you supposedly 'love' just goes to show what kind of core morals you have, and just how much they revolve around you. Sorry, but I don't think you're going to get any nice advice from anyone here, nor any sympathy. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
troubadour Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 So, I know this may sound ridiculous. I had a one night stand with a guy I knew in Europe in summer 2011. It was the second time I cheated on my boyfriend since 2009 (the first was a longer sort of affair at the start of our relationship with an abusive person). My boyfriend and I have been together through it all for 4.5 years, and with my 18-20-year-old behavior behind me, and my committed future in front of me, I want to know a rather silly question. The europe guy and I watched a favorite children's movie of mine that I still like to this day. It happened to be just before the cheating took place. Is it okay for me to still like this movie? Can I watch it again? If I never tell my boyfriend, could I watch it around him? The cheating has permanently barred me from an entire country, but should I be banning myself from a childhood classic due to a nasty association? Can I give it a new association? I would say this is one of the most idiotic posts I have ever read on this forum. But of course, you can watch it again. Cheating doesn't seem to be much of a problem for you so why are you making such a big deal about watching the movie again? If it's really that hard for you you can always start associating it with the new pope.... i bet it would make a dramatic difference. Link to post Share on other sites
Eclypse Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 Well you can't force yourself to like it again. I haven't cheated but I imagine if I had rewatched Jurassic Park with another girl right before getting it on would completely destroy the movie for me. Every time I saw it, every time I thought about dinosaurs even I would be reminded of the worst thing I'd ever done. How do you feel when you think about this film? Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted April 17, 2013 Share Posted April 17, 2013 I agree with op. This does sound ridiculous. Link to post Share on other sites
empirestate87 Posted April 19, 2013 Share Posted April 19, 2013 So, I know this may sound ridiculous. I had a one night stand with a guy I knew in Europe in summer 2011. It was the second time I cheated on my boyfriend since 2009 (the first was a longer sort of affair at the start of our relationship with an abusive person). My boyfriend and I have been together through it all for 4.5 years, and with my 18-20-year-old behavior behind me, and my committed future in front of me, I want to know a rather silly question. The europe guy and I watched a favorite children's movie of mine that I still like to this day. It happened to be just before the cheating took place. Is it okay for me to still like this movie? Can I watch it again? If I never tell my boyfriend, could I watch it around him? The cheating has permanently barred me from an entire country, but should I be banning myself from a childhood classic due to a nasty association? Can I give it a new association? Wow. She cheated on her boyfriend she 's concerned with a ****ing movie? ****ing wow. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted April 19, 2013 Share Posted April 19, 2013 Wow. She cheated on her boyfriend she 's concerned with a ****ing movie? ****ing wow. Hopefully she's at least hot... Link to post Share on other sites
Archgirl Posted April 19, 2013 Share Posted April 19, 2013 Oh jeez guys lay off! She wasn't inviting judgements on her choices. She asked a very simple question. Whatever has passed between her and her partner regarding her cheating is clearly none of our business as op has decided not to disclose that. Op I think you should steer clear of the movie, I think it is compounding a sense of keeping things from your partner which may prevent you from fully moving on from past modes of behaviour I'd imagine he would also feel somewhat hurt and betrayed if he ever did know the significance of the film. It's just a movie. It won't snuggle you at night or tell you jokes when you are sad. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted April 19, 2013 Share Posted April 19, 2013 Oh jeez guys lay off! She wasn't inviting judgements on her choices. She asked a very simple question. From last night's discussion...does posting the ancillary details not inherently invite inquiries of credibility...? I didn't question anyone's right to voice an opinion. Freedom of speech also means exposing your ill-founded arguments to public debate and ridicule. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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