more confused than ever pleeeease help!

[sock83]

hey all,

On monday night i told my ex that we wont see each other for a couple of weeks and for to only ring me if she MISSES me! Well now im im more confused than ever because last night (friday) she rang me twice, she talked to me like a freind but still i made it clear to her to only ring me if she misses me.

What does this mean? she rang twice in one night but was talked to me like a friend very wird.

please help.

p.s she knows how hurt i am at the momeent and could see that monday night, in a way i wish she didnt call because as everyone knows its almost impossible to be someones friend after you just have spent the last two years together.

1.did she ring me because she missed me?

2.should i tell her that it's either you want to be my lover or nothing at all?

 

soooooooo confused

[backspn]

I would tell her that you need some time to think some things over. Tell her that you will talk to her later and that need some space right now. When she calls you dont answer the phone and let it go to voice mail. Do this for as long as you need to get your life back on the right track. She is making you miserable. The time away from you will give her a wake up call and if anything it will bring her closer to you. When I made my first post here about 2 weeks ago I was determined NOT to play games....but you know what....its all about games. The game you are going to play with her is the "lets see what she will do" game. She will miss you more if you do this than if she talks to you every night. I am on my 2nd day of no contact and it is THE HARDEST thing I have ever done. She hasnt called yet and I havent called her. I go on AIM under my new account and she doesnt know the new account name. I can see her on but she cant see me. It kills me to not IM her but I think....what is 3 weeks of NC if I get a chance to bring her closer to me. If not....then I cant stay her friend forever. Either way I get to find out. If I were you I would do the same. Im tired of feeling bad and only she can do it to me if I let her. Enpower yourself. Can you give me your opinion on my post? Thanks.

[sock83]

hey backspn,

look it's not as if i didnt want her to call that's kinda what i was hoping for but i just dont know how to percieve it , to ring me twice in one night it sent me crazy and she called my moblie phone and the nomber doesnt come up so i answer it regardless. She knows it hurts me so why does she do it?

Maybe she is more confused than i am? all i can say now is that i am not contacting her at all and if she still calls and still cant get the message after that, i still cant believe this is happening i go home from my working contract in 2 weeks and she's comming up to stay for my last week then i go home with her.

Backsp do you think that when she spends 6 days straight with me (the most in three months by far) these lost feelings will come back i mean they have to at some point i know i couldnt spend 6 days with someone that i just broke it off with and just be thier freind at some stage of those 6 days something has to happen right?

thanks

[backspn]

They could definitely but you are going to have to be the guy who she met in the first place. Dont smother her in "us" talk. Have fun with her and dont bring it up. I know she will be expecting it so dont do it and be surprised at the results. My advice is expect the worst and land on your feet. I was watching "Band of Brothers" last night and one of the officers told a private that he understands that he is scared but until he realizes that he is already dead then he wont be able to function and survive. My advice to anyone who is struggling is expect the worst. Just get it in your mind that you wont get her back and that she doesnt want you anymore then you will have the REAL chance at getting her back.....make sense? I guess what Im saying is be carefree and be yourself. Yes....it could get her to love you again...but I wouldnt expect it so soon.

[sock83]

i guess i'll just have to wait and see what happens, i mean i have never heard of ex's doing this i mean once it's over it's over you dont go spend a week with them it's just un heard of. I'm pretty optmistic that after a few days of our time together alone no other influence that feelings have to come back i mean why would she still want to spend this amount of time with me if nothing is there?To be friends yeah right who wants that after spending two years together, i certaintly wouldnt and the fact that im comming home with her it just seems to weird.

i will expect the worst because the worst is reality at the moment but could you do this and not feel something ansewer that question?

[backspn]

I wish you the best with what ever happens. I am currently trying to do the NC but honestly I dont know how long I'll last. This is harder than anything Ive ever done. She has been my everything for 2 1/2 years and now it feels like she is leaving me slowly. I am hoping that the NC for the next 3 weeks will make her see what she had in me. My birthday is coming up next week and I want so bad to be available for her to call me and wish me a happy birthday. I still struggle with the fact that people change their minds so fast that I will have doubts about every other woman from now on. Maybe I am too nice of a person and I should be like my friends who treat their girlfriends like dirt and still have them for years. I dont know anymore....I only try to be the type of person that I would like to have in my life. Best luck to you in your trip Sock.