chucksagent Posted April 22, 2013 Share Posted April 22, 2013 animallover- way to bury that idiot who posted before you! Lol. hahaha answered his own question hahaha thats epic. And to that same person, NOT everyone drinks... Alcohol is a drug. I understand in your smug little "my way or no way" world drinking is just the norm....but please don't misrepresent facts. MANY successful people don't drink at all: Robin Williams, Donald Trump, Penn Jillette, Triple H, CM Punk, my uncle who is VP of a huge company and makes TONS of money, and these are just OFF THE TOP of my head. I know it's hard to understand, but some people like to have all their faculties about them and view their self respect and family above "gettin crunked with their besties." Now, I am in your camp. I have drank a lot and BEEN very drunk. I still drink occasionally but very rarely. And it's not because I think alcohol is the devil...it's because I think the hangover and the way I feel the next day is the devil. Lol. But don't judge people who don't drink or who think drinking is bad, because LOGICALLY my friend, we are the crazy ones, not those with will power. Lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted April 24, 2013 Share Posted April 24, 2013 I sure like to party. .... but I'm 26 so I have out grow wanting to get wasted and go out. Once in a while it's fun to have a drink. .... but if you're in a sorry state, where you're falling over ppl ad acting like an idiot. ....it's best to stay home in the comfort of close friends, who know the real you and can forgive overlook stupid behavior. Link to post Share on other sites
crederer Posted April 26, 2013 Share Posted April 26, 2013 Oh wow dude. Get rid of her. I'm enraged just thinking about it. If you keep her, you're going to question what she's doing everytime she goes out and it'll turn you into a jealous raging man. She did this in front of you? That is so effing disrespectful and it looks bad on you if you are willing to tolerate that garbage from her. Your friends even saw it, making it all the more humiliating and degrading. Really sorry man. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted April 26, 2013 Share Posted April 26, 2013 If she was very drunk, it could have been that the guy kissed her and she didn't have enough wits about her to push him off. I don't know - I wasn't there to see if she was all over him, or if she was just staggering around while he attacked her. But if you have a history of trust, I would give her the benefit of the doubt and give her a 2nd chance. You'll find out pretty quickly if she takes it seriously or not, based on her future actions. If she says "No, I don't want another drink because I don't wanna lose control of myself", you'll know she's thinking about what she did. If she goes out to the club and gets ****-faced drunk again while dancing with a bunch of guys, you'll know it wasn't a big deal to her, and that will tell you what you need to know about her character. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
messyjessy Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 I hate myself for this, but I have done the same for my boyfriend of more than 5 years. He wasn't at the party I was at. I was really drunk and at a frat party, not the place for taken people to be at, I realize that now. I was a stupid college freshman excited that guys actually thought I was pretty. It's dumb because I know my boyfriend thought the same. I told him that night, because there was no hope for forgiveness if I tried to hide it. And the sad thing is I barely remember it happening. I was left alone on the dance floor at the party by my friends and I had no idea where they were. Next thing I knew some guy was looking at me and I don't know something came over me I guess but I remember that I kissed him because after finding my friend I had explained to her what happened and that's what I remember about the actual act. I'm an idiot and I hate myself every day for what I've done and will probably never forgive myself for what happened but my boyfriend found it in his heart to forgive me. But just because I was drunk it doesn't make it okay but I know it wouldn't have happened if I wasn't. So after that I stopped drinking. As he was trying to move past it. I on the other hand can't find any part of my body to forgive myself. Link to post Share on other sites
xpaperxcutx Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 Drinking with one's friends does not automatically mean it's okay to become dead drunk and senseless. Even when I had used to drink back then, I knew my limitations and I wouldn't ever use drink as an excuse to act like an idiot. Your girlfriend did that and it shows her immaturity and her lack of common sense for her health. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 Op, This is a tough situation. I would say it's not as bad as her cheating on you (the "intent" has to be there, imo)...but still...she did what she did and now you're going to worry about her whenever she goes without you. HOWEVER, you SHOULD have been by her side AT ALL TIMES if she was ****faced. So there's some onus on you. You're her boyfriend, you're supposed to be taking care of her. I would never go out drinking with my gf/wife and let her get wasted and then leave her alone. Hell no...I would be by her side at all times making sure she was ok. I honestly would just chalk this off to you guys going out, getting drunk, and doing stupid **** like many many other people in their early 20s do. Like others said...when you're drunk, sometimes you don't know WTF you're doing and you go off reflex. She sounds like she really feels bad about it and I'm sure she does. I would talk to her and make sure that she ONLY gets wasted around you (and that you take care of her). If she goes out without you, then she needs to learn to cut herself off before she gets too drunk or that she's with friends you trust who will take care of her. Other than that...there are just going to be certain "risks" you take if you want to party and get drunk and you just have to accept them. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 Women are strong and independent.. until men are expected to take care of them as though they were toddlers rather than fellow adults. OP would've looked like a chump ***** if he had hovered around and "taken care" of her right after she cheated on him while he was in the same room. Well...he should have been hovering around her BEFORE she "cheated" on him...which would have prevented all this from happening. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 No, he shouldn't have. As an adult she's responsible for her own actions. I take it you've never been drunk or wasted before. Link to post Share on other sites
Chi townD Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 This is a zombie thread folks. The orginal poster hasn't been here in most two months... Dead thread.. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelin Frisky Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 She damaged your trust. That's just how it is and it will always be an asterisk on her score card. Don't let the blame-layers bother you. You're welcome on LS. Link to post Share on other sites
Geiss Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 If she was drunk when she got there, the bar staff should never have served her. WTF is it with young people today who believe the only way to go out and have fun is to involve large amounts of alcohol? Ferphukk's sake, get your lives on track! The damage you do to your livers! Doesn't show now, but in 5 years time, hers will be green and her skin will be 30 years older than she is! It makes me so angry. And nothing you can say, will justify what you do. I have seen the after-effects of excessive drinking, in all manner shapes and forms and it's ugly, undignified and pitiful. It's disgusting. Holier than thou aren't we. Link to post Share on other sites
therhythm Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 I take it you've never been drunk or wasted before. Are you going to honestly take the blame of the cheater and place it on the OP? Are we adults not supposed to be responsible and owners of our own acts? If you can't behave properly while drinking... don't drink! Usually I find your posts very instructive but I think you are wrong here. Link to post Share on other sites
dasein Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 Agree with nervispervis and aasdf, this is likely a habit with her, so ingrained that your presence didn't even phase the habit. She gets drunk, she hooks up. Who knows how long this has been going on like this? but for certain, she isn't GF material. I'd back way off, continue to date her for sex, casually, whatever, but certainly not exclusively. Keep your freedom, don't waste it on what is plainly a very bad bet. Women who are truly into you 1. Don't get stinking drunk, and 2. Don't make out with other people in your vicinity no matter how drunk they get, they just don't. Ask yourself this, have you ever, ever had a GF you were really into in your vicinity and then gone and made out with some other woman?? Ever, under any circumstances? I sure as hell haven't. Dating a blotto drunken woman is drama you don't need. If this is regular with her, more unwanted drama and annoyance will result. I walked on several women back in the day who were like this and looking back those were some of the wiser decisions I made back then. She did you a favor, gave you your freedom back on a silver platter. Take it. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 Are you going to honestly take the blame of the cheater and place it on the OP? Are we adults not supposed to be responsible and owners of our own acts? If you can't behave properly while drinking... don't drink! Usually I find your posts very instructive but I think you are wrong here. Yeah, she screwed up. There's no ignoring that. But I'm just saying HE should have never let her roam around drunk in a club. She's 21...she's at a club...she's gonna get drunk! That's what people do at the age and in that scene. As her MAN, he has a responsibility to make sure she stays safe. Never mind that she slipped up...it could have been a LOT worse. She could have been raped. All I know is that I partied heavily in my 20s (and 30s) and I know I would never EVER leave a woman I was with (that I cared about) alone in a club when she was drunk. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 Either way...it's a ****ed up situation. I know *I* would be pissed as hell if I was op and my girl kissed another guy, drunk or not. I'm not condoning her actions...I'm not even really saying she should be forgiven. I'm just saying that it's not AS bad as if she knowingly and willingly cheated (there have been times that I did some really stupid **** when I was drunk). But, the part that I keep harping on is where op left his girl's side when she was drunk. You. Just. Don't. Do. That. Ever. Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted June 12, 2013 Share Posted June 12, 2013 As the thread starter hasn't visited since late April, we'll conclude this issue is resolved. Link to post Share on other sites
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