Cheated on by fiance but did I overreact?

[Toddbt12y1]

ID: a part of the conscious that seems more basic; it contains desires and lusts. Very animal like and violent.

 

Super Ego: a control of the ID.

 

We are on a much higher conscious construct then animals. Our tri-psyhic apparatus is built to help us control ourselves better than mere animals.

 

Sigh* I'm done.

[KatZee]

ID: a part of the conscious that seems more basic; it contains desires and lusts. Very animal like and violent.

 

Super Ego: a control of the ID.

 

We are on a much higher conscious construct then animals. Our tri-psyhic apparatus is built to help us control ourselves better than mere animals.

 

Sigh* I'm done.

 

I was going to say something along these lines earlier. We're not just uncontrollable animals screwing everything we see. We have control over behaviors and desires. We're capable of being monogamous, and I know some like to say that it's not natural to be monogamous, but we're not the only species that behaves this way.

 

Turtle Doves, American Bald Eagles, Gibbons, Swans, French Angelfish, and Wolves, are only some of the animals who mate for life. If they're capable of doing it, why not us?

[Tinie]

Sex is a natural act. I would worry if he went out and fell in love.

 

Ah. But that's not an excuse to go banging people left and right.

 

And I really strongly have to disagree with everything you said earlier. A man who loves you doesn't treat you like his toilet paper.

 

Yeah humans are animals. Other animals live in burrows in the ground and only understand a few things: eat, sleep, escape from predators, and reproduce. We don't because we consider ourselves not to be so primitive. If you cannot suppress your sexual urges, go live in a hole in the ground with other rabbits or in a tree like squirrels, and stop calling yourself a human and associating with the human species.

[Almond_Joy]

OP, I don't think you overreacted. In fact, I think your ex should consider himself lucky that his property was all that got broken. The rage I felt when I found out I was cheated on was so strong that if I'd had access to my ex at the time he would have incurred physical injury.

 

There are few hurts that cut as deep as infidelity, and there are plenty of betrayed partners who are traumatized for several years if not the rest of their lives as a result of being cheated on. It's been nearly two years since I found out I was cheated on and I still can't bring myself to see that ex as anything other than a POS. There's always a better choice than cheating on someone. Always.

 

I think it's pinned either at the top of the Infidelity forum or The Other Man/Other Woman forum, but there's a great post called Letter To A Wayward Spouse. I highly recommend you read that to get a handle on how you'll likely process this and what to expect to experience.

[love1336x]

Nope. Sound like you did fine. He broke your heart, you break his crap.

[sunbeach200]

He is lucky you didnt smash his head with a chair!You are doing the right thing by NC. He needs to realise what he has done and he needs to suffer for it! Cheating is wrong fullstop!

 

It is impossible to forgive him at this point. I took my cheating BF back after five months but under my terms. Told him that we were to do couple councilling to see whether its possible for him to commit to a relationship.

 

Its nearly two months since DDay and we are slowly back on track. I doubt very much that my BF will be cheating on me in the future after what we have been through.

 

And yes he did love me back then ( and still does). He basically got turned on by the situation and lost control. Sex and love was separated. It can happen.

[ThatJustHappened]

This has my life and it was the first time getting proposed at the late age of 28. Now, I feel everything was a lie. Right now I've been ignoring his phone calls and apologetic messages. I hate him.

 

Though not sure if this I overreacted? Did I? Anything would be helpful. I hardly ever get mad and definitely not this enraged ever in my life. I can't really think straight at all and feel like I'm going to go out of my mind. All because of him. What if I had never found out? Would he still be cheating? The more I think about this, the more I'm hating him now.

 

Since when is 28 old to be proposed to? Also, how many proposals are you expecting to get?

 

You didn't overreact..he's a jerk.

[BrownBarbie]

LOL! I see my attempt to mock you didn't work. I don't need to look up Freud. I did take Psychology.

 

What a troll. You're a disturbing individual...did you escape the nuthouse? Or are they giving barn animals computers or whatever?

 

Look at your groupies liking you post.

 

Wait, am I a dog or other barn animal? I'm still in the nut house baby and you're just as crazy for still quoting me. Be gone.

[BrownBarbie]

He is lucky you didnt smash his head with a chair!You are doing the right thing by NC. He needs to realise what he has done and he needs to suffer for it! Cheating is wrong fullstop!

 

It is impossible to forgive him at this point. I took my cheating BF back after five months but under my terms. Told him that we were to do couple councilling to see whether its possible for him to commit to a relationship.

 

Its nearly two months since DDay and we are slowly back on track. I doubt very much that my BF will be cheating on me in the future after what we have been through.

 

And yes he did love me back then ( and still does). He basically got turned on by the situation and lost control. Sex and love was separated. It can happen.

 

At last. Someone with knowledge. Good luck to you lady. I wish you the best. I'm sure he's a good man and worth fighting for.