confused_as_usual Posted September 18, 2004 Share Posted September 18, 2004 Hi, would just like some input here. I posed a question here yesterday about canceling on plans to go to a wedding and my thoughts were confirmed about it being interpreted as a date. This wedding is out of state and the airfare ended up being higher than I thought it would. This, combined with the fact I didn't want to go with this guy to the wedding (I thought how depressed I would feel being there with him), led me to cancel. I canceled two weeks in advance and told the bride-to-be to let me know if there were any problem with it, and I'd take care of it (in terms of her having paid in advance for the food). I also told her I wanted to send a gift. Truth is, another reason I decided against going (even though I had said I would go for months and did invite this guy, strictly on a platonic basis, least in my head), is I searched my soul and realized I am the one who's done most of the work in the relationship with the bride to be, in terms of maintaining our friendship. So...between the high airfare, having to spend the whole time with this guy, and the fact I really am not that close to the bride, I don't feel too bad. Plus, it's not like I changed my mind at the last minute. My question is...if these two individuals get upset with me, were they really my friends at all? And especially, if the guy gets upset, is that a definite confirmation that, yes, he really had ideas going on in his head about the two of us? Thanks, Confused as usual Link to post Share on other sites
disconcertainly Posted September 18, 2004 Share Posted September 18, 2004 If I were the bride and I saw the situation as you have described it I would not be mad at all. You have to do whats best for you. Link to post Share on other sites
red-rose-in-winter Posted September 18, 2004 Share Posted September 18, 2004 You did the right thing by deciding not to go to the wedding. If you KNEW that you would be depressed going with this guy to the wedding, you did the right thing by staying home. Why put yourself through an ordeal when you know you will be miserable? And since you and the bride-to-be aren't really that close, I'm sure she understood why you didn't come to the wedding. As for your question on whether if they get upset with you were they really friends at all.....sure people get upset, but they will get over it if they still want to be friends. If not, then what can you do? At least you explained to the bride your situation -- 99% of people just don't show up. Link to post Share on other sites
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