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Caught between two guys


Sarah

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I am extremly confused right now. I have a wonderful boyfriend whom I love more then anything and always will. We have been together for a very long time. But here lately we have been having some minor problems. I often wonder if its not because we have been together so long. I am only 18 and he is 17. I think occassionlly that we should take a break apart because we ae younger and maybe have been in this relationship too long. Since we have been together I have gotten to know one of his finds very well. Not to long ago i felt as if I might be starting to like him so I in a way told him. Just a couple of days ago we were talking when my boyfriend was not around. While we were talking he told me that he had feelings for me like I do for him. I then began telling him about the problems my boyfriend and I were having. his advice was that maybe we should take a break from each other. Since my feelings for his friend are so strong I told my boyfriend that maybe that would be best. The next day I began talking more to his friend. When my boyfriend found out he was furious. Now his friend is afraid to talk to me. Not only that by my boyfriend getting mad I believe maybe his friends feelings for me have changed slightly it is like he is afraid of what peple might think but yet when we are alone he is fine and totally into me. my boyfriend has begged me not to talk to his friend anymore and start acting more like the girlfriend I should be. The thing is I am not to sure whether thats what I want to do or if I should wait and see what happens with his friend and me. I am so confused I need someones help fast!!!!

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Sarah, I'm not much of a proponent of long term relationships. So I have a sort of bias to begin with. But I think that when you're 18, it doesn't make sense to tie yourself down to one guy, especially in the situation you describe above where your relationship with your original boyfriend isn't working so well. You need to move on if you've found someone else you're interested in, and you need to make that clear to your old boyfriend. Tell him flat out that you just don't think it's going to work with him, that you enjoyed your time with him...but be clear it's over. Ambiguity would only hurt you, him, and any future relationships either of you wished to have. Don't hold on to an old relationship when yu're so young, you have to experiment at least a little more.

 

(Draconis)

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