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Ladies opinions needed on: "You were just too nice"......


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Posted

Are there any women out there who could help us guys with the phrase: "He is just too nice" or "You were just too nice". Is the translation? "You are too nice to me=I am looking at another guy and I feel guilty"???? Ladies please help.....

Posted

It could mean anything from 'I like drama and you don't give me any' to 'quit treating me well because I can't be bothered to treat you well'.

Posted

turst me thoes chicks who say that are nuts f*** drama

Posted

I think it means: you're doing all the right things, and I respect you, but I'm just not in love with you.

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Posted

But if thats the case then why doesnt she see it and do you have a chance again? I know you have a chance...but realistically....do you have a chance with that woman again?

Posted

Could be an intimidation thing.

Standards too high to live up to and all....

 

 

Read this thread

Posted

It's a doozy, no doubt about it... especially when we hear about all the women out there supposedly wondering, "why can't I ever meet a NICE guy?"

 

I guess the problem is that most nice guys don't keep them on their toes, or come across as too available, or something.

Posted

I think the "too nice" phrase is mostly used when guys focus all their energy on the woman they are dating. The women feel smothered, and their first instinct is to run. Obviously, these ARE nice guys, and you can't just say, "You're smothering me" (well some people do say it), but the typical nice let-down in that situation is "You're too nice", followed by girl running away madly. :p

Posted
Originally posted by backspn

Are there any women out there who could help us guys with the phrase: "He is just too nice" or "You were just too nice". Is the translation? "You are too nice to me=I am looking at another guy and I feel guilty"???? Ladies please help.....

 

Hi Backspn:

 

It could be that she feels "guilty" about something? What exactly went down with you two? Why and who broke up? When?

 

Netalia

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Posted

I could see where the smothering part would come into play.....wish I know now what i didnt know then. A woman wants to have someone around and to love but doesnt want him around ALL the time. I can see that now. I knew something was up and I asked her if she wanted to be with me anymore and she told me no. I could tell that she had a guy whom she had been friends with and they didnt act on anything til we were done....couple weeks later they were dating. But karma is a bitch cause he ended it a month later the same way.....he didnt want to be tied down.

 

So here we sit...for 5 months...still single and still talking...although I just initiated NC for the next few weeks...tired of talking. When someone says that "you are just too nice"...does that mean they dont love you anymore??? Or is it that they still love you but they need space? With almost 3 years together, dont we stand a good chance of getting another try......especially if Im different now. What I mean is I dont smother her anymore.

Posted

ask her if you could get back again...

Posted

I'd love to know that myself. I used to hear that with annoying regularity. "You're a nice guy, but..."

Posted
Originally posted by Scott S

I used to hear that with annoying regularity. "You're a nice guy, but..."

 

Maybe it's those cranial ridges and the perpetual frown....

 

Maybe they don't like you to kling on to them :lmao:

Posted

when I say that a guy is too nice that's what it means: he's too nice. Meaning, he has no opinions of his own and if he does then he doesn't want to talk about it for fear of starting an argument. It also means that "I'm sick of asking you what you want to do on a date and you always say whatever I want to do is fine." He just too nice to ever cause a stir in the relationship.

Posted

Jilly,

 

You hit the nail smack on the head. I didn't want to cause waves in the relationship. Hmm gives me something to thing about.

Posted

I agree with Jilly..

 

"Too nice" means just that. It's cool that she was honest with you actually. Next time, don't be so eager.. pull back a bit and make her work a little to be around you, just like you have to work a little to be around her. A little give and take is a lot sexier than someone being 100% available to you and 100% agreeable.

 

Hope that helps.

Posted

I'd kill to meet a "nice" guy - but is there really such a thing? To me a nice guy is someone who can be faithful and respectful. So far I can't seem to find any "nice guys". The ones I meet are liars, too much into porn, flirting and playing games.

 

Do nice guys really exist? If so where can I find one?

Posted

Yeah, nice guys are out there. I gave up a really nice guy to have a relationship with a complete a**hole just recently.

 

How messed up is that?

Posted
Originally posted by Jeannie

The ones I meet are liars, too much into porn, flirting and playing games.

Do nice guys really exist?

 

Hi Jeannie:

 

Tell me more. Are you attracted more to "looks" and "sex-appeal" more than other areas with a man? The reason I ask is that some of these charming and sometimes good looking males have "other options" and they know that they can play the field---so guess what? They do.

 

And then there is the PORN addict or the guy that tells his gf, "Hey. I am an ordinary heterosexual guy who only looks at the porn sites once in awhile because I am amazed at how booming this industry is." Wow! My ex bf told me that line and he does watch porn on his computer too, and saves all sorts of sex clips on it too... At least I know he is not homosexual.

 

And the game playing--ugh! Some men never grow up, immature emotionally.

 

There are good guys out there---they might come across a bit boring but if you give them a chance, you might find some great qualities!

 

Good luck,

Netalia

Posted

Hey, at least your ex bf admitted to looking at porn. My ex still denies it to this day. I guess all the porn sites I found on the "history" part of MY laptop just jumped in there all by themselves while we were living together.

 

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...........

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Posted

Im a nice guy...obviously...never cheated on her and when she was around me...she was it!! What do girls really want in a guy? Do they like to be treated like dirt soetimes? Seems the bad guys get all the girls. I know she still loves me....I know she is still attracted to me....how do I go about getting her to notice me and want to be around me more?

Posted

I know that I like guys that are honest, funny, cute and sweet. I think that sometimes girls like the challenge of being involved in a bad guy. We always want what we can't have, right?

 

If she still loves you and is still attracted to you then I don't see what the problem is. Maybe make yourself less available, show that other people enjoy being around you as well. Maybe she'll think twice about not noticing you.

Posted

That is easy...........................women that are little psychos will tell you that you to "NICE". Women that like drama and are unhealthy will tell you, your'e to "NICE".

 

Don't worry about women saying this to you, be Blessed and move on fast!

Posted

It depends on each person, of course, but when I say this to men, I usually mean, "you're nice and all, but I don't feel anything for you...". And that doesn't mean I like drama or anything, either... It's just a way to say "thanks, but no thanks" for some people, I think.

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Posted

I think that I was just available too much....but isnt that what being GF/BF is all about? Spending time with each other? Or is it...spend time with each other but just not too much time with each other........I dont get it. She loved spending every minute with the guy she was seeing after me, which ended a month later cause he didnt want to be tied down going into college. Do you think she is just very cautious about seeing me cause she doesnt want to get hurt again? But then again...she knows how I feel about her........

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