I'm paranoid vs he's not to be trusted

[Mana]

I've been w/my bf for about 2 yrs (long distance). The first year there were a couple incidents where he lied to me so it's been hard to trust him. About a yr ago he got a job at a sub shop as a delivery driver where these 2 girls worked, one 19 and one 26. I asked if they were attractive and his response was "they aren't pretty but they aren't ugly". Months go by and he tells me the older girl would chant his name everytime he walked in the door, for no apparent reason. I thought it was odd, but he would say others did it too though she initiated it.

 

Then one night about 1 am I hear him get a text. It was from her telling him how gross some pizza is and if he wanted a piece. I'm thinking, why is she texting him this late and why does she have his number. He says she knew he had trouble sleeping at night so probably assumed he'd still be up. As for having his number, he said she probably got it from work.

 

He told me he would often do drink runs for people at work, always getting her a drink too. One time she asked him to run and get her KFC, which he did. He just said he didn't mind, it was close by.

 

Of course by now I'm already suspicious of what's going on at work and questioning him. He rarely, if ever, texted me from work because according to him cell phones have to be out of sight. He also said he never got breaks.

 

Then one day he gets another text, this time from the 19 yr old. This text had hearts. I text the girl asking who are you and why are you texting hearts to my bf. She laughed and said don't worry I'm just a coworker. Next day at work these girls threatened to beat me up, laughed, made fun of me, and he said nothing. It continued for days.

 

Shortly after I found out that he had sent texts to the 26 yr old girl on her bday. This was also the day he got home about an hour late from work. He denies it being anything more than "happy birthday" but had deleted it, and that he had stopped at a male friend's house to say hi.

 

Since his car was having trouble he decided to quit. His last day one of the girls told the 26 yr old "are you going to let him leave without hugging him?" so she ran up to him and hugged him goodbye.

 

You'd think that was the end of it, but it wasn't. A couple months later he got a text from her saying "we miss you, where are you working so we can come visit you".

 

Quick jump to now. He got a new job. He tells me about his day at work which consists of working with a bunch of guys. According to him, no females under the age of 50 work anywhere close to him. Of course that's true, right? I found out yesterday that he failed to mention the 20 yr old girl that was training him. He apologized for not telling me but to him, he wasn't lying. He just didn't want me to know.

 

He thinks I'm paranoid. I say I have a reason to be because he's lied to me and kept things from me intentionally so nothing he says can be considered the truth. Who's right?

[Confused3232]

Girl - move on! There are too many red flags to count!

[Jbum5]

He lied once, and as you witnessed, he lied again. Who's to say he's going to stop now? Get your facts straight with him and be ready to hear things that may not necessarily be pleasing to your ears. Once you show him you can handle that, perhaps he may be more open about his interactions with the opposite sex. If that fails and you find that he continues to be a lying buffoon, drop him.