Goodbye Posted April 26, 2013 Share Posted April 26, 2013 For some reason I feel even more alone post-break up on the weekends. Mine was a long distance thing...so it wasn't even like we were together most weekends. It just feels a little more raw. I'm a little over two weeks into it, and I guess I'm feeling stronger over all. This weekend I don't have my kids and I realize that I am painfully alone. While he is with his wife and son...I have no idea what that dynamic is really like right now, but in my head it is better than this pit. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Goodbye Posted April 26, 2013 Author Share Posted April 26, 2013 Maybe. Or maybe there wasn't really a D-day? Who knows... Link to post Share on other sites
DelusionalOne Posted April 26, 2013 Share Posted April 26, 2013 I'm sorry you feel so awful It sucks! Mine was an LDR too so I know how you feel. On a positive note: At least with an LDR you're not going to run into him in the grocery store or anything. How long are you NC now? Link to post Share on other sites
DelusionalOne Posted April 26, 2013 Share Posted April 26, 2013 Maybe. Or maybe there wasn't really a D-day? Who knows... I had those thoughts too.... don't let your mind go there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Goodbye Posted April 26, 2013 Author Share Posted April 26, 2013 I'm sorry you feel so awful It sucks! Mine was an LDR too so I know how you feel. On a positive note: At least with an LDR you're not going to run into him in the grocery store or anything. How long are you NC now? I started NC around two weeks ago. I broke it earlier this week by emailing him. We exchanged a few emails but I have gone back to NC because I could see things were exactly where we'd left off. Yeah, I'd be pretty shocked if I ran into him in the grocery store, lol. No, instead I just get to run into my exH's new gf. Fun! Link to post Share on other sites
lynn1954 Posted April 26, 2013 Share Posted April 26, 2013 For some reason I feel even more alone post-break up on the weekends. Mine was a long distance thing...so it wasn't even like we were together most weekends. It just feels a little more raw. I'm a little over two weeks into it, and I guess I'm feeling stronger over all. This weekend I don't have my kids and I realize that I am painfully alone. While he is with his wife and son...I have no idea what that dynamic is really like right now, but in my head it is better than this pit. Lots of sympathy from me to you, and let's think of some real solutions for you, because sympathy only helps so far, you need action!! LOL What do you love to do? Do you like doing things in your home, or away from your home? Would going to a restaurant or Starbucks make you happy? or cooking something fun at home or brewing a big pot of coffee at home? Do you calm down best by cleaning and organizing stuff, or do you calm down best by relaxing and watching DVD movies or going out to a movie? Are you in U.S. or U.K.? Is it time to put your winter clothes away and prepare your spring and summer clothes? Can you do some pamper stuff at a salon or at home...hair stuff, skin stuff? If you are a normal-size person without food issues, then I suggest turning to comfort food! Get yourself some treats. If you are a weight-watcher or emotional eater, then I suggest movies or bookstores or library. Do you have loving family or friends to hang out with this weekend? Who ya gonna call? 7 Link to post Share on other sites
Praying4Peace Posted April 26, 2013 Share Posted April 26, 2013 Lots of sympathy from me to you, and let's think of some real solutions for you, because sympathy only helps so far, you need action!! LOL What do you love to do? Do you like doing things in your home, or away from your home? Would going to a restaurant or Starbucks make you happy? or cooking something fun at home or brewing a big pot of coffee at home? Do you calm down best by cleaning and organizing stuff, or do you calm down best by relaxing and watching DVD movies or going out to a movie? Are you in U.S. or U.K.? Is it time to put your winter clothes away and prepare your spring and summer clothes? Can you do some pamper stuff at a salon or at home...hair stuff, skin stuff? If you are a normal-size person without food issues, then I suggest turning to comfort food! Get yourself some treats. If you are a weight-watcher or emotional eater, then I suggest movies or bookstores or library. Do you have loving family or friends to hang out with this weekend? Who ya gonna call? I just want to say I'm feeling the same way and your posts are so helpful. I've noticed you always take so much time and thought in your helpful suggestions and always give action items. Are you in the helping/therapy field? Just curious. Link to post Share on other sites
lynn1954 Posted April 26, 2013 Share Posted April 26, 2013 I just want to say I'm feeling the same way and your posts are so helpful. I've noticed you always take so much time and thought in your helpful suggestions and always give action items. Are you in the helping/therapy field? Just curious. Thank you, P4P!! By nature, I'm a helper and I'm practical. By training, I was a special education teacher of high-school age deaf and hard of hearing students. When I had various problems in my life, I sought therapy and I benefitted from various therapy suggestions, so I pass those same suggestions on to others because they worked for me. Thanks again for the nice compliment. Link to post Share on other sites
Athens Posted April 27, 2013 Share Posted April 27, 2013 two weeks post DDAY was sunshine and rainbows and hyper-bonding- its a few months into reconciliation that get tough- As a BS, I will tell you what I tell everyone no matter what- affairs sap your energy and kill your self-esteem- Win yourself back- take care of you- be stronger, be better and do it for you- Give yourself the gift of taking care of yourself- I know I have done that and I am so much better for it- my husbands OW is still stuck in the what ifs and her intrusions are annoying- Please- be strong and make this about you and being a better person- if everyone in the triangle would take care of them then everyone will heal quicker- YES, my husband and I have been having sex like crazy, yes, we have been tighter than ever YES he said the OW was the biggest mistake he ever made- yes, all the things you imagine are happening just like all the things I imaged about my husbands affair happened- but you know what is most important- I have rediscovered ME and that is so important- do it for YOU! Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Goodbye Posted April 27, 2013 Author Share Posted April 27, 2013 Glad you are having lots of sex Athens. Well done. Link to post Share on other sites
Athens Posted April 27, 2013 Share Posted April 27, 2013 Goodbye, that's all you got from my post? Well, I must have misunderstood your intentions, thought you were looking for input, but maybe you just wanted sympathy. My advice and point is....it is what it is, affairs are destructive to all involved, but take care of you because ultimately that's what's important. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lynn1954 Posted April 27, 2013 Share Posted April 27, 2013 (edited) For some reason I feel even more alone post-break up on the weekends. Mine was a long distance thing...so it wasn't even like we were together most weekends. It just feels a little more raw. I'm a little over two weeks into it, and I guess I'm feeling stronger over all. This weekend I don't have my kids and I realize that I am painfully alone. While he is with his wife and son...I have no idea what that dynamic is really like right now, but in my head it is better than this pit. Hello, Praying4Peace, Goodbye and any other weekend peaceniks (as opposed to "weekend warriors"): What are we all doing this weekend to feel better? Maybe one of us will inspire or be inspired by another. I slept until 9:30 a.m. then made a pot of coffee. Sipping a cup now with Cinnabon creamer in it. I'm still in my pajamas, on the sofa, under a blanket, computer in my lap, surfing the Internet. I talked to my mother on the phone. For me, that brings peace. Afternoon will include a nice long shower, and lots of lotions and moisturizers. Tonight I'll be going to "The Price Is Right Stage Show" with my friend. She's a BS like me, and we met at a divorce support group. She's one of the few people who know that after my divorce I was an OW for a while. This was hard for her, but she stood by me anyway. She has more challenges than I do, and yet she's a bit more fun-loving and upbeat than me. She represents my goal to spend time with people who are important to me, people I love, people who make me feel good. Sunday...well, Sunday I'll be driving around the car that I plan to win at The Price is Right tonight! LOL Actually, I'll describe Sunday in a post tomorrow. I hope y'all dial it down or ramp it up depending on what you need and want. Be well!! Edited April 27, 2013 by lynn1954 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Goodbye Posted April 27, 2013 Author Share Posted April 27, 2013 Thanks Lynn! Hanging in there. Good you are staying busy. We will come out the other end eventually... Link to post Share on other sites
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