Choosing the right thing???

[nina]

My boyfriend and I of two years recently broke up. He broke up with me out of nowhere and I was devastated. HE said he just needed some time to figure some things out for himself. When we were broken up he was cruel to me and I had no idea why he broke up with me. I begged him to talk constantly and he was always so mean. I have alot of anger and disappointment built up towards him. Well about a 2 weeks ago he starts calling me out of the blue. And by this time I finally had it in my head that it was over between us and I was moving on. I started seeing this other guy but we kept it really quiet because he was a friend and ex roommate of my ex boyfriend and my best girlfriend also liked him alot. I started getting very strong feelings for him and he the same for me. Well my ex kept calling and wanting to talk. So i decided to meet him and talk. He told me that he realized he had made a huge mistake and that he knew he was really messing up by not being with me. He said that it just scared him when he realized how much I meant to him. And that was why he thinks he broke it off with me. He said that I was the only person for him and that he only wanted me in his life.

 

Now Im in this situation, I really like this other guy and I can totally see a wonderful future with him. Hes perfect for me. But I am still in love with my ex and he wants to get back together and I sort of want that too. I just dont want to be that idiot to run back to an ex. I mean he really screwed me over and I cared so much about him. Now everytime I am with him all I think is I know he is going to do this again. Im scared to get hurt like that again. I feel like I cant trust him anymore after the way he hurt and treated me. But something is telling me he really is sincere and he might really change. I dont know what to do. Should I try this out with this new guy and risk losing my best friend and the love of my ex? Or should I try to trust him and maybe work it out?

[smh124]

Your situation is exactly the same as mine. I broke up with her after 2 years. We still love each other. But she is with some other guy and cant give me a 2nd chance b/c it wouldnt be fair to this other guy. I really dont have any advice for you. I just thought it was odd that your situation is the dame as mine.

 

Steve

[bluechocolate]

Re-read what you wrote here.

 

When we were broken up he was cruel to me and I had no idea why he broke up with me. I begged him to talk constantly and he was always so mean. I have alot of anger and disappointment built up towards him.

 

Now everytime I am with him all I think is I know he is going to do this again. Im scared to get hurt like that again. I feel like I cant trust him anymore after the way he hurt and treated me.

 

Can you be absolutely sure that you want to get back with this guy?

 

This is a tough one - in your situation I don't really know what I would do. What I do know is that if you do decide to go back with him it won't be the same and you may just end up losing both of them.

 

BTW - haven't you already taken the risk of losing your best friend?

[nina]

Smh How do you feel about her seeing the other guy?

[nina]

I feel like I have betrayed her but I dont want to not try this with this guy and maybe miss out on somehting great. He treats me like a princess. I just dont want to hurt her and I know I will.

[smh124]

Nina,

 

It bothers me quite a bit that shes with this other guy. Especially when she tells me that he's so nice and she just sees him more as a friend. But he tells her he loves her already and blah blah blah.

 

She tells me she doesnt trust me not to hurt her again. And b/c of this guy, is the reason she wont give me another chance.

 

So I havent called her in 2 weeks since our last conversation.