strozzap Posted May 2, 2013 Share Posted May 2, 2013 I have been in a relationship with this girl for over 1 year. I used to be very independent but now I'm extremely clingy, needy and I have a very low self-esteem. It's not because of her, it's my fault. I became paranoid, so paranoid! So much that I've been thinking that she's a lesbian and so I try to find every little things that she says or do that would confirm my thoughts. I told her about it, we had a fight about it but eventually I apologized and it was fine for few weeks. Then few weeks later, I tell her that she's having a secret relationship with her friend (a girl) and I explain what makes me think this way... I know I'm all wrong and I'm paranoid... But I can't stop thinking about her leaving me for a woman (or anybody). Why did I become so crazy?! Also, it seems like I can't take any decisions anymore. I always ask her what she wants to do... If she is okay... How she feels... All the time! I'm not a leader anymore, I'm a follower... Even though she always reply "I don't know what to do" or whatever... It's clear that she wants me to take decisions! She wants me to be a man! But I'm acting like a wussy! What happened to me? I don't know who I am anymore! I don't even know what are my interests anymore! Everything I do is for her! I just think of her! What the hell? I have no life of my own anymore! She's tired of this! She wants me to have my own life and be happy and be more independent! But she doesn't want to break up. I feel like I'm self-destructing... Why? I really need help! Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted May 2, 2013 Share Posted May 2, 2013 Maybe it's true! Link to post Share on other sites
Titania22 Posted May 2, 2013 Share Posted May 2, 2013 Have you considered taking up online gaming, it's very absorbing and thus will give her some space. I really don't have anything useful to offer, but I know my life improved when I seriously took an interest in SC2. You can make a whole life around that game. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author strozzap Posted May 2, 2013 Author Share Posted May 2, 2013 Maybe it's true! What is true? Link to post Share on other sites
gdes32 Posted May 2, 2013 Share Posted May 2, 2013 I'm not sure what to tell you here except to man up. Find a hobby or activity that gives you a life outside of the gf for awhile. Gaming, fishing, hunting, a sport, just pick anything and go with it. As far as the trust issues go, has she ever done anything to you to make her untrustworthy? And if so you obviously haven't been able to have truly forgiven her yet. This happened to me in a relationship quite a long time ago. She cheated on me early in the relationship. I said I forgave her but I never really did. Eventually I was getting driven mad with thoughts of not being able to trust her and I had to end it. With trust issues, you've either got to let the reason you are finding her untrustworthy go, or let her go altogether. Link to post Share on other sites
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