Girlfriend cheated but keeps writing and ringing wanting to talk..

[andyC]

Well.. to put a long story short, weve been together for just over a year and we live in seperate countries, but I worked in her country for 6 months and I have visited her a number of times in between.. A few months ago I finished my job in her country and went to a festival in another country where I met my old girlfriend (a girl i was with for around 4 years) I told my old girlfriend about the new one and she went crazy and went off with one of my "friends" .. this "friend" then sent a text to my new girl and told her i was angry at him for going with my old girl.. the new girl is a very jealous type and didnt know my old girl was at the festival and told me not to come back to her country (i had a flight booked) and proceeded to go with other people..

 

After weeks of begging and ass kissing I finally convinced her to come and visit me and she did for two weeks and they were great.. after leaving we wrote like 5 mails a day to eachother and spoke every other day.. she said she wanted babies and to be married and all that b.s .. anyway she started to act strange and so i said I would return to her earlier and she was happy with it but i felt something was wrong and asked her if she had been with another person and she kept saying no no no for a few days but i finally got it out of her that she had... I slammed the phone down and that was a week ago.. she has written many mails about how she loves me and all this blah blah but she just couldnt handle having a long distance relationship (we were apart for 3 weeks) and she still wants me to come to her so we can talk about it.. I personally dont see what there is to talk about.. she keeps ringing my friends asking to speak to me etc..

 

the question is.. DO i speak to her or dont i? .. and if I do.. what do i say? ... the thing is I now think shes cheated on me more than this because if she cheated on me when things were great, when we went through bad patches surely she did as well... but I love her alot.. and shes the most beautiful girl ive ever seen in my life (i know i know) .. and we make the most passionate love on another level to anything ive experienced before.. I just dont know what to say to her...

 

??

[Jilly10340]

I don't think the question is whether you should talk to her or not. The question is what are you willing to live with. If you love her and can trust her again and you think that you two have something going for you then talk to her. But if you two get back together and you know theres going to be mistrust, suspicion, weirdness....then I would seriously reconsider. Because if you have any of those things then that's what's going to end it in the end, no matter how much you love her.

 

Can you bring yourself to trust her again? Ask yourself that first...

[mudobber]

It sounds like the lass likes you. You might consider taking her up on the life long, perhaps eternal love offer. You could go through a bunch of crazy ladies and have a couple of ex’s before you find another that 1) likes you and 2) that you are compatible with.

 

But if you do choose this gal, treat her like gold always, never a guilt trip, and talk about the future a-lot. Girls love guys that talk about the future, and it gives depth to a relationship.

 

What does her affair mean? It means she had premarital sex. Let him without sin cast the first stone... I think you should apologize to her for pressuring her into a corner then hanging up on her. Not that you were wrong in doing so, you expressed your jealousy, which might be a good thing, and now you have an opportunity to be romantic and cast a hook into her heart.

[DJ_Dork]

long distance relationships do not work, dump her.

[Jilly10340]

I think whether they work or not depend on the individual. I've known long distance relationships to work. My best friend has been dating his gf for over a year and they only get to see each other on weekends if that.