The Happiness/Confidence Guide

[fiftyofsomethin]

Hey everyone. You might remember me from that post I made earlier in the week. Well, since then, I have actually improved by leaps and bounds regarding my happiness. And I wrote down the rules that I personally needed to follow to get to the point I am at.

 

Since these worked so well for me, I decided that I should share them with you.

 

I am telling you right now though, the biggest threat to happiness is yourself. If you do not wholeheartedly believe in yourself that you can and WILL be happy, then it is only sabotaging yourself.

 

These rules try to help with both happiness and confidence: my two biggest personal issues/concerns. If you do this properly you may even notice that you will have a sort of "magnetic" effect on others. It was confusing to me, but one class in particular at school which is full of kids who generally ignore me has now turned to be full of kids who try to get my attention and talk to me when they can. It's sort of unbelievable, in all honesty. But of course this is no guarantee and it is not easy. This is just what worked for me, and I truly hope it works in the same way for you guys.

 

Here you go:

Accept your worrying thoughts and thoughts ABOUT worrying or doubt and know that it’s okay that you have them. Just let them drift off or if you need to come back to them later if that really actually ARE important, compartmentalize them. Do not think about your happy/sd thoughts of the past with, or your hopes/fears for the future. Realize that your present state and happiness do not need to rely on either of those at all.

 

Just write down any idea or thought as soon as you can, and if you don’t and you forget it, don’t worry about it, just let it go. (This is more personally for me as I have a hard time with stopping to worry about thoughts/ideas I forget)

 

Bring your mind to the moment. Don’t worry about past events. Don’t worry about what will happen in the future. Just enjoy and experience the moment.

 

Be confident that whatever it is you are doing is right and it's what you are supposed to and should be doing. Don’t second guess yourself or have self-doubt.

 

Think outward. Think of others. Don’t think or talk about yourself unless asked. Other people simply do not care about you or your thoughts as much as they care about their own. Just don’t think about SOMETHING to say. Just say it. Talk about the first thing you see. Say more. Think less. Be excited and curious about the other person and what they are saying. Even just LISTEN to them. You are not responsible for providing the conversation. Expand on topics. Don’t be aggressive and take the responsibility to talk and make plans for later, just expand on things they have brought up.

 

Accept praise or compliments by saying “Thank you!” or maybe saying “I’m really glad you appreciate (whatever it is) I have been working on it for a while!” (or something along those lines).

 

( For the gentlemen looking for love )Girls don’t care what you look like as long as you are confident. Don’t try very hard to impress others. Be yourself without worrying.

 

And above all, just don’t give a **** about what others think, say, or do.

 

I hope you guys find this useful! It sure helped me to realize these rules/points.

[todreaminblue]

What a lovely post........

 

 

i am making improvements too........i am shedding bad memories.....using them to define where i have come from and how far i have come.......its dead skin.......

 

friends and family are saying how vibrant i am becoming my eyes are glowing....and i think its my true self finally coming out, and yeah scared as crap ...but i cant stop...not going to stop ...regardless of being worried i am going to be cut down by someone...i think when you figure out you have a god given right to happiness.......you can seek it...obtain it....keep it.......i have sought...i have obtained...now i am going to keep........a smile on my face......no one is taking that smile from me...they can share it..lol....and the voices can shut the hell up.......hugs...... thanks for posting....:bunny::bunny: rabbits for ya....deb

[fiftyofsomethin]

That is truly great to hear!

 

I'm not entirely sure if this has happened at all with you, but just today, I reached some point where I think I nearly was high off of happiness.

 

It was a very unusual experience seeing as I don't and have never done drugs, but It's like I simply did not give any care to things that were not directly in front of me or people who I was talking to at the moment. It's like I was in an oddly euphoric mood.

 

Maybe that's what true bliss feels like.

[stephgabriele]

That is truly great to hear!

 

I'm not entirely sure if this has happened at all with you, but just today, I reached some point where I think I nearly was high off of happiness.

 

It was a very unusual experience seeing as I don't and have never done drugs, but It's like I simply did not give any care to things that were not directly in front of me or people who I was talking to at the moment. It's like I was in an oddly euphoric mood.

 

Maybe that's what true bliss feels like.

 

FIRST OFF, I absolutely love this post.

 

And I know what you mean by high off of happiness. I live in Washington state and for the past week it has been sunny. Me being a ginger, I usually hide inside but this time I drove with all of my windows down and sang, not caring about what I was singing. I was flipping through radio stations and stopped at Sexual Healing and didn't even care. Was. So. Happy. I live off of that amazing feeling.

[steveT95]

This is a great post. I love it.

 

It reminds me of who I used to be before the relationship, when I was getting popular at college. It has highlighted how different I am and probably the reasons why I don't talk to people anymore. I will definitely put this advice into practice!

 

Thanks!!