DelusionalOne Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 UGH!!!! Mu concentration is all over the place today! I was doing a report this morning and kept screwing up so badly that I had to walk away for 10 minutes, get coffee and start over! I'm so pissed... At him for f#%ing with my mind and mostly at ME for letting him!!!! I assure you... I am not going to do anything stupid (i.e. break NC) I just feel like I was doing so well...hopefully I will shake of this shyte soon and hopefully he'll just disappear again and let me continue on my journey! Yes. I know that I sad and pathetic and have no business giving anyone out here any advice! Thank you for letting me vent! I really have no place else to turn. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lilmisscantbewrong Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 You will have moments like this. Don't beat yourself up. Dust yourself off and start again. Those moments will become less and less and be further and further apart. keep the faith. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GreyhoundtoNowhere Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 are you kidding? you're so strong for even going through with NC. I work with my MM and I know that until summer gets here, I cant even consider going NC because seeing him would drive me crazy. and he would "win" everyday. Hell, today he sent me a text that said "are you finished with me or something?" because apparently I'm not looking at him the same. What?!! so of course I fed his ego and made him feel better. ugh. men. anyway- tangent. so he won one- just take back your power. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
tryingto Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 I'm sorry! I have good days and bad days too... And knowing that the bad days are lessening and the good days are increasing are what motivates me to continue to move forward! Don't forget.... "They" (our exMMs) might "win" at times but we "win" every day we maintain no contact!! :bunny: 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BrokenPrincess Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 I've had that kind of day too. Mind wandering, sad, wondering if he's thinking of me or having these conflicted feelings since ending it last Friday. Feel like I completely backslid. And stupid me kept drinking more coffee as a distraction, which probably didn't help my anxiety. Now the work day's over, I got very little done, and I'm extremely dehydrated. Sigh... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author DelusionalOne Posted May 8, 2013 Author Share Posted May 8, 2013 Are you kidding? You're amazing. I have the luxury of total space from xMM and it's gut-wrenching. You're working with yours, have to see him, and are handling it like a trooper. I can't imagine how hard that must be. You're awesome. He hasn't won squat! :-) Luckily, same company...different offices. I only have to "see" him cyber-ly everyday... and hear his name all day long. Thank you all for your support. I feel like such a loser. Feeling so proud that I was putting it behind me and moving on... ugh. Worst part.... he actually did NOTHING. He contacted me with a work question. Nice to see I'm still "delusional". LOL Link to post Share on other sites
Author DelusionalOne Posted May 8, 2013 Author Share Posted May 8, 2013 I've had that kind of day too. Mind wandering, sad, wondering if he's thinking of me or having these conflicted feelings since ending it last Friday. Feel like I completely backslid. And stupid me kept drinking more coffee as a distraction, which probably didn't help my anxiety. Now the work day's over, I got very little done, and I'm extremely dehydrated. Sigh... I highly recommend yoga! It's been a god-send for me. 6 hours a week! Link to post Share on other sites
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