Maybe you "ugly" guys can try this

[Treasa]

Do post. I think your positive energy and focus on self-improvement should be an inspiration to the guys who are so hyper-negative.

 

Awww. I will always love you, Milla. I mean, tbf.

[PJKino]

Thank you for making my point!! Just because ONE WOMAN or even a GROUP OF WOMEN doesn't find you attractive doesn't mean that NO WOMEN on the planet find you attractive.

 

I love you, now.

 

Some of us arent willing to get rejected hundreds of times before a possibly yes to a women we probably wont even be attracted to

[tbf]

Oh God, Benedict Cumberbatch!! He reminds me of someone, but I don't recall who. He has such an interesting face and demeanor.

 

The other two are ok, but they wouldn't turn my head.

While we agree on Cumberbatch, in some ways we disagree about why we find certain men attractive or not.

 

To me, Reynolds and Jackman would turn my head for a second look. But chatting and interacting with them would immediately shut down any attraction.

 

Cumberbatch might or might not turn my head for a second look but any interaction would focus my attention on him fully. He just sparks me!

[Treasa]

There's a coworker of mine who's 10 years older than me, gray AND balding, and kinda cynical, but I want him SO BAD. He's got this funny, sexy edge to him. And he's very nice to me.

[sweetkiwi]

Out of curiosity, of the three men who were linked, which ones appeal or possibly none appeal to your subjective preferences?

 

Hugh all the way!!!!! The manliness is just Mmmmmm :lovelove:!!!""

 

I picture him all hairy camping in the woods catching fish for our dinner. I mean I hardly think of him at all :bunny::bunny:......

[tbf]

They approach me. In general I have better success when I get approached than when I approach.

If all you get are previously committed women approaching which you have a distaste for, wouldn't it be logical to start approaching single women that you don't have a distaste for?

 

It's one thing to be patient and wait things out. It's another to be upset about who approaches you. Do you understand the distinction? In remaining passive to approach, you're in effect narrowing your playing field to very bold women which is fine if what you want and are patient with, are very bold women. This is the same problem that some women experience, in that they complain about the men who are approaching, instead of shaking things up if the tactic isn't working for their needs.

[ThaWholigan]

Do post. I think your positive energy and focus on self-improvement should be an inspiration to the guys who are so hyper-negative.

Yeah, I think I'll just present my view to whatever the situation is - they can take it or leave it IMO.

[sweetkiwi]

you make it sound like they will date or sleep with a man in a wheelchair or is deformed

 

Funny you mention it, I totally madeout with a guy in a wheelchair last week. He is sexy. Bounced all over his lap dancing on him. He's handsome but seriously his sense of humor and open mind is what made me talk to him in the first place.

 

And that's me in the avvy.....so I am not visibly deformed or otherwise "disabled"...

 

You DO realize what an asshat you sound like though right!? Like guys in wheelchairs are the bottom of the barrel !!!!!

[tbf]

Hugh all the way!!!!! The manliness is just Mmmmmm :lovelove:!!!""

 

I picture him all hairy camping in the woods catching fish for our dinner. I mean I hardly think of him at all :bunny::bunny:......

YAH! Subjective preferences are awesome. That's why there's enough men to go around for most woman and enough women to go around for most man. Because we like different partners!

[Star Gazer]

There's a VERY fine line with self-deprecation. Most guys use it in excess, or focused on a particular flaw(s), and it's a major turnoff.

[Treasa]

There's a VERY fine line with self-deprecation. Most guys use it in excess, or focused on a particular flaw(s), and it's a major turnoff.

 

Oh yes. Only do the self-deprecation if you are really confident and clearly confident.

 

I make fun of myself all the time. People laugh. I'm almost always laughing, smiling, you name it. People know I'm happy and I don't take myself too seriously.

[joystickd]

If all you get are previously committed women approaching which you have a distaste for, wouldn't it be logical to start approaching single women that you don't have a distaste for?

 

It's one thing to be patient and wait things out. It's another to be upset about who approaches you. Do you understand the distinction? In remaining passive to approach, you're in effect narrowing your playing field to very bold women which is fine if what you want and are patient with, are very bold women. This is the same problem that some women experience, in that they complain about the men who are approaching, instead of shaking things up if the tactic isn't working for their needs.

I don't have a distaste for them. I mean they satisfy my needs sexually but I do want more. The problem is I approach and get BS. Right now for instance at my job I have a nurse and a CNA that like me. I know this 100% from coworker and the nurse from her own mouth. The CNA her first day there she was asking about me to other employees saying I was cute. I gave her my number but she didn't call. Then I asked her out and she mention about having some issues with her baby's father and its not like I am trying to avoid you but I have that going on. The nurse is so into me it's like something the other coworkers joke with me about. When I mention anything its "I'll have to think about it". I even hear she wrote a CNA up for some BS reason finding out the real reason was because the CNA was nice to me. This nurse even dislikes another nurse because she is nice to me and has mention that if she didn't have a boyfriend she would date me. I look at the guys here and they have it great if they live in a big city. I stay in a rural area and have some success but there is a sh*tload of flaky women here

[tbf]

There's a VERY fine line with self-deprecation. Most guys use it in excess, or focused on a particular flaw(s), and it's a major turnoff.

Excellent, another subjective preference!

 

Of the three men linked, which one(s) do it or don't do it for you?

[Treasa]

You know what works well with light self-deprecation? Giving others honest compliments.

 

When you can see the beauty and goodness in others, and you can let them know that you see it...it's really magical.

[tbf]

I don't have a distaste for them. I mean they satisfy my needs sexually but I do want more. The problem is I approach and get BS. Right now for instance at my job I have a nurse and a CNA that like me. I know this 100% from coworker and the nurse from her own mouth. The CNA her first day there she was asking about me to other employees saying I was cute. I gave her my number but she didn't call. Then I asked her out and she mention about having some issues with her baby's father and its not like I am trying to avoid you but I have that going on. The nurse is so into me it's like something the other coworkers joke with me about. When I mention anything its "I'll have to think about it". I even hear she wrote a CNA up for some BS reason finding out the real reason was because the CNA was nice to me. This nurse even dislikes another nurse because she is nice to me and has mention that if she didn't have a boyfriend she would date me.

So two women want you where one has baby daddy issues and is concerned about dating men at present because she doesn't want to cause drama with her ex. This isn't your issue. It's hers and has no reflection on you so don't take it personally.

 

Have you asked the nurse out?

 

I look at the guys here and they have it great if they live in a big city. I stay in a rural area and have some success but there is a sh*tload of flaky women here

If you're unhappy in a rural area, instead of envying the men who live in metros, why not start applying to metro hospitals so you can relocate?

[joystickd]

So two women want you where one has baby daddy issues and is concerned about dating men at present because she doesn't want to cause drama with her ex. This isn't your issue. It's hers and has no reflection on you so don't take it personally.

 

Have you asked the nurse out?

 

If you're unhappy in a rural area, instead of envying the men who live in metros, why not start applying to metro hospitals so you can relocate?

I wish it were that easy to move. I help out with my family right now. 2 sisters in school I help with them and help around the house so moving right now isn't an option. I do but I get "I'll think about it" or some BS reason. I know with the nurse it's to the point that everyone in the facility know she likes me and I have let how I feel be known but she won't make a move.

[charlietheginger]

Seeing that everyday would get on my nerves

[joystickd]

So two women want you where one has baby daddy issues and is concerned about dating men at present because she doesn't want to cause drama with her ex. This isn't your issue. It's hers and has no reflection on you so don't take it personally.

The thing is if it's like that then don't be checking for me and finding out about me unless you are up for having something. When I wasn't looking for a woman I acted like it. My actions were consistent with what I meant.

[suds00]

if a man has a physical handicap he'd better be funny and rich.defend your gender.

[tbf]

I wish it were that easy to move. I help out with my family right now. 2 sisters in school I help with them and help around the house so moving right now isn't an option. I do but I get "I'll think about it" or some BS reason. I know with the nurse it's to the point that everyone in the facility know she likes me and I have let how I feel be known but she won't make a move.

That's lovely that you're willing to stick around for your sisters. How old are they and if you don't mind me asking, is there a reason(s) why your parent(s) can't take care of your sisters on their own?

 

If the nurse is playing games, have you considered online dating and possibly meeting a woman at a distance, who's willing to relocate to be with you?

[Imajerk17]

Great thread Trease. Hell I was a nerdy unathletic kid growing up but instead of bemoaning my fate I did something about it. Now at my age I date a lot. I don't have thibgs all figured out but I am learning more all the time.

[Keenly]

Stupid humor works every time.

 

What I like to do is when I'm out with a girl, say at a store or something, is a put on a really heavy fake accent (Swedish, Russian, British... I've.gotten really good st these because I just like to mess with people) and I'll find an employee and ask for help with the dumbest things. Chicks love laugh... if you can make them laugh on command, your going to have it a lot easier than an attractive man who is as boring as a stick.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Lip Sync-Off with John Krasinski - YouTube

 

I realize I have no hope of convincing you that most women are attracted to the following things:

 

1. Humor

2. Playful self-deprecation

3. Confidence

4. Laid-back-ed-...ness?

 

But I'm sure as hell gonna try anyway!

 

I'd jump all over either man, regardless of what he looked like. This is so freaking funny and hot.

 

Oh yea, that's a great idea.

 

Why not get to know a woman gradually over time, showing her every positive facet of your personality over time until she's seen all the best of you.

 

She calls you smart, funny, awesome, and kind.

 

And then she rejects you and you come out to find that she decided after meeting you for the first 5 minutes 6 months ago, that you were never going to be anything more than a friend. S-O-U-L crushing.

 

Great idea.

[tbf]

The thing is if it's like that then don't be checking for me and finding out about me unless you are up for having something. When I wasn't looking for a woman I acted like it. My actions were consistent with what I meant.

Shift perception. She obviously is crushing on you but not at a place in life that she can do anything about it. Is it really so horrible that someone has a crush on you, finding you attractive enough that she's curious about you?

[joystickd]

That's lovely that you're willing to stick around for your sisters. How old are they and if you don't mind me asking, is there a reason(s) why your parent(s) can't take care of your sisters on their own?

 

If the nurse is playing games, have you considered online dating and possibly meeting a woman at a distance, who's willing to relocate to be with you?

I'm 30. Dad hasn't worked since I was 13 because of health issues. He has cardiomyopathy. He has had a heart attack, a stroke, and blood clots in his arm. It's not really me taking care of my sisters it's me helping my family in general. Plus I help with my 91 year old grandfather that stays with us.