Maybe you "ugly" guys can try this

[joystickd]

Shift perception. She obviously is crushing on you but not at a place in life that she can do anything about it. Is it really so horrible that someone has a crush on you, finding you attractive enough that she's curious about you?

In a way it is. I think she is at a place in life to do something but afraid to. It's like this if you want something you will make arrangements to make it happen. I want to move but at this point it's not possible but I am making arrangements so when the time comes there won't be any problems

[Star Gazer]

Excellent, another subjective preference!

 

Of the three men linked, which one(s) do it or don't do it for you?

 

I can't see the link; on my phone.

[joystickd]

Shift perception. She obviously is crushing on you but not at a place in life that she can do anything about it. Is it really so horrible that someone has a crush on you, finding you attractive enough that she's curious about you?

It's stuff like this that has me still messing around with women already in relationships. They state what they want. It's not BS with crushing or game playing. I'm not wasting energy or time on someone to find out they are not interested.

[ChrisGX]

Lip Sync-Off with John Krasinski - YouTube

 

I realize I have no hope of convincing you that most women are attracted to the following things:

 

1. Humor

2. Playful self-deprecation

3. Confidence

4. Laid-back-ed-...ness?

 

But I'm sure as hell gonna try anyway!

 

I'd jump all over either man, regardless of what he looked like. This is so freaking funny and hot.

 

The exact qualities or components of an attractive personality are, believe it or not, fairly subjective.

 

1. The things people find funny vary from person to person.

2. Some people interpret self deprecation for weakness.

3. Confidence is important but I've heard many girls talk about how they dislike it when unattractive guys are confident enough to approach them in clubs.

4. A lot of girls prefer guys who are serious gogetters over guys who are laid back; Guys who are motivated to make something of themselves.

[Treasa]

The exact qualities or components of an attractive personality are, believe it or not, fairly subjective.

 

1. The things people find funny vary from person to person.

2. Some people interpret self deprecation for weakness.

3. Confidence is important but I've heard many girls talk about how they dislike it when unattractive guys are confident enough to approach them in clubs.

4. A lot of girls prefer guys who are serious gogetters over guys who are laid back; Guys who are motivated to make something of themselves.

 

I think you're interpreting what I wrote in a way other than which I intended.

 

I'm laid-back, but I'm also ambitious. You don't have to be neurotic and grumpy and defensive to be ambitious.

 

I don't even understand the club reference, but I still by the fact that confident, happy people always attract more than do insecure, unhappy people.

 

Nothing is completely universal, but I'm willing to bet that most girls are going to want to get with a guy who knows his self-worth over a guy pissing and moaning about his life.

 

And how you feel DOES show, even if you don't say a word. People can tell.

[ltjg45]

So being broke, never worked in over 5 years, and yet have a workable personality will still get you girls?

 

Even if that was true, I wonder if they are women work having and whether or not they are willing to stick with that male in the long run.

 

I have a hard time thinking a woman who got everything by herself would want a broke man just because he has a personality despite she has far more stable options available elsewhere.

[Roadkill007]

So being broke, never worked in over 5 years, and yet have a workable personality will still get you girls?

 

Even if that was true, I wonder if they are women work having and whether or not they are willing to stick with that male in the long run.

 

I have a hard time thinking a woman who got everything by herself would want a broke man just because he has a personality despite she has far more stable options available elsewhere.

 

 

 

what good is a stable option that doesn't react to and with you, and lights your fire? That would be no different than gold-digging or arranged marriages with no passion.

 

That said, I've no doubt being a hobo would make the initial barrier of getting opportunities for a gf somewhat harder, but it's not impossible.

[ltjg45]

what good is a stable option that doesn't react to and with you, and lights your fire? That would be no different than gold-digging or arranged marriages with no passion.

 

That said, I've no doubt being a hobo would make the initial barrier of getting opportunities for a gf somewhat harder, but it's not impossible.

 

Even if I were to "light her fire", I can't sit here and expect her to take care of a grown man who has nothing.

 

That makes me a failure. No self-respecting woman is going to be with a man who is a failure.

 

And the women who is fine with that? No offense but those women is not exactly ones worth going after to begin with. I seen those kinds of women every day and even I, who can't find an entry-level job to save my life, won't have the balls to date them.

 

I'm more content being single than to date them. I will let them take their drama to someone worthy of their "time". Until I'm capable of taking care of myself, I doubt any women worth having is within my reach, personality or not.

 

If there are women worth having who is fine with broke males like me, I might as well start rolling my dice then because I do need to get lucky at this point.

[Anela]

Lip Sync-Off with John Krasinski - YouTube

 

I realize I have no hope of convincing you that most women are attracted to the following things:

 

1. Humor

2. Playful self-deprecation

3. Confidence

4. Laid-back-ed-...ness?

 

But I'm sure as hell gonna try anyway!

 

I'd jump all over either man, regardless of what he looked like. This is so freaking funny and hot.

 

From what I know of him, and what I see (I saw Promised Land the other day), John Krasinski is just my type.

[ScreamingTrees]

I think you're interpreting what I wrote in a way other than which I intended.

 

I'm laid-back, but I'm also ambitious. You don't have to be neurotic and grumpy and defensive to be ambitious.

 

I don't even understand the club reference, but I still by the fact that confident, happy people always attract more than do insecure, unhappy people.

 

Nothing is completely universal, but I'm willing to bet that most girls are going to want to get with a guy who knows his self-worth over a guy pissing and moaning about his life.

 

And how you feel DOES show, even if you don't say a word. People can tell.

 

So, how can one just wake up one day and feel "happy"? Should I take medication?

 

I also do think it does show occasionally, but I don't think I often feel "woe is me", I just feel frustrated with myself, if anything. I think other people would say that I'm laid back, quick with a joke, and often can make a joke at my own expense, without making it seem as if I actually believe what I'm saying..

 

I just don't have "confidence" in the sense that while *I* believe that I'm an awesome person internally, *I* don't believe that I'm physically attractive in general, and so at best I might be good for platonic relationships with the opposite sex. I'm OK with that, I like people, male or female. I'm not trying to force anything on anyone.

 

I blame no one. I don't blame the average girl for not really noticing me or seeing me in that way over other more attractive guys. And yet I don't bow my head, bend over for total strangers who I perceive as "better looking".. I believe that I'm worthy, but I don't believe that others feel the same way due to the way I've been treated in the past.

 

If anything, I just blame myself, the genetic make-up that may render me unattractive to a large number of people. I didn't ask for anyone's pity, and it doesn't matter how I feel about myself, negative or positive.. It doesn't change my appearance and what the majority of people may even subconsciously perceive of it.

 

And even if you do not believe me, I do NOT wallow in my pity from day to day, once I go outside and step away from the keyboard, it actually really helps with my mindset and my mood, and most of the time, even at their worst, my feelings are neutral. I can even crack a smile, can have idle chit chat in the heat of the moment, whatever.. Those other thoughts vanish, and I'm no longer sitting alone at home as I most often do obsessing over all of my flaws and spending time trying in vain to fix or change them.

[ChessPieceFace]

I'd jump all over either man, regardless of what he looked like. This is so freaking funny and hot.

 

Wow, you'd jump all over either of 2 famous actor millionaires that millions of women fawn over. That so totally convinces me that looks and status don't matter.

 

Thanks for your latest thread of condescension and female cluelessness, I needed a good chuckle.

[ltjg45]

Wow, you'd jump all over either of 2 famous actor millionaires that millions of women fawn over.

 

Also this.

 

These examples is not helping. They are complete opposites to me.

 

1. They got status and tons of it. I have nothing.

2. They got money and tons of it. I don't even have $50.

3. As a result of #1 and #2, they are both being chased by tons of women. Obviously you can tell what that means for me.

 

A personality that they have is just icing on the cake. Even without one, they would still be chased by a far bigger number of women than I am.

 

If those 2 guys is what you are attracted to, OP, then that sends a clear message that I'm hopeless in the dating game.

 

Those two can't get any more "alpha". I'm just a cockroach they can spit on in comparison.

[ThaWholigan]

Any example would be met with vitriol anyway so .............

[Roadkill007]

That makes me a failure. No self-respecting woman is going to be with a man who is a failure.

 

 

You haven't failed till you stop trying your best to pull yourself out of the hole you're in. Being a loser isn't a state of being. It's a state of mind. It's the whole "well this is about as far as I'm getting", it's the "OMG I never got anything but promoted for 10 years but now I'm fired and I'm nothing now!", etc. etc. As long as you have that passion to become a better person (being able to take care of yourself financially part of that too ofc), and you sincerely put in the effort, I'm sure a good woman will appreciate that. It's not the state of being financially dependent that's the issue for many of these romantically-inclined women. It's the state of "woe-is-me", or basically the dead-fish eyes. (that ended.... not very clearly.... but I don't quite know how to put it another way)

[Xinreeki]

Hugh Jackman is one of the nicest people in Hollywood in addition to his good looks. I'm very surprised that there are any women who don't love him

 

Hugh Jackman is ok I guess, but he's not really my cup of tea.

 

Now Fry from Futurama on the other hand... he's got the swoon factor x3000!!!

 

Swoon Alert!!!!

[colejack]

Of course their fame and money will garner more attention, but that doesn't mean you can't be laid back and funny in your normal every life like them. My friends and I do stuff like this all the time. We'll go to karaoke nights and dance and sing all over the bar. Can't say I've gotten any women out of it, but I have a ton of fun and don't care about how I look doing it. I think that's the message the poster is trying to make.

[ScreamingTrees]

Those two can't get any more "alpha". I'm just a cockroach they can spit on in comparison.

 

Money can be stolen, burned, taken away by force, whatever.. Fame is fickle.. It can even be a multi-million dollar illusion. It is not a tangible extension of a person's being or an inseparable lifelong part of their internal being. Money can be unlawfully acquired, stolen from others, etc.. It's not even always an indicator that a person has truly worked harder than any other hard worker or was any smarter, it's mostly the luck of the draw. You're only a cockroach because you allow yourself to be such..

 

Even if I was broke and objectively ugly as sin, I'd still never feel that way about my SELF, especially in comparison to anyone else. Forget about alpha/beta labels, it's bull****. No one is coming up to you treating you a certain way because the universe has mystically chosen you to be "beta" and serve "alphas" everywhere..

 

You LET those people treat you in such a way. Regardless of how *I* feel about myself at any given time, I know that no one else has the right to treat me like ****, unless they want me to treat them in the same way or worse.

[Sith Apprentice]

The old women are attracted to a sense of humor myth. Most times the guy gets rejected before even being given the opportunity to display his sparkling personality. This is why women can take 1 look at a guy and within 3 seconds decide "hes not my type".

[JuneJulySeptember]

 

So, go after:

 

http://www.fashionica.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/43c24e29-f7d9-4f92-ac2f-540aa087ab89.jpg

 

Instead of:

 

http://www.thebestgossip.com/uploaded_images/CINDY-CRAWFORD-NEWS-HOLLYWOOD-767946.jpg

 

The women I've gone after have hardly been as hot as the first woman. Maybe a few are on par with her. But few. She's what I would consider REALLY hot. A woman like that could be like the most beautiful woman in the world to me and every bit as hot as the 2nd girl.

 

Not that it matters to them though. Women would rather date some hot guy who always has his 3rd eye open for something better than a guy who really adores them but is not physically attractive.

[ChessPieceFace]

Another option is simply don't date

 

Why didn't I think of this

[ltjg45]

So, go after:

 

http://www.fashionica.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/43c24e29-f7d9-4f92-ac2f-540aa087ab89.jpg

 

Instead of:

 

http://www.thebestgossip.com/uploaded_images/CINDY-CRAWFORD-NEWS-HOLLYWOOD-767946.jpg

 

You sure you don't have those 2 mixed up?

 

Because I rather have the "7" than the "10".

[ChrisGX]

Ok so I'm curious but what's the minimum amount of looks you need in order for girls in general to give you a chance to showcase your personality?

[colejack]

The old women are attracted to a sense of humor myth. Most times the guy gets rejected before even being given the opportunity to display his sparkling personality. This is why women can take 1 look at a guy and within 3 seconds decide "hes not my type".

 

I don't doubt that some women will decide they don't want a guy in the first few seconds. Others can be convinced otherwise. Either way, showing your sense of humor will only do you good. A friend of mine isn't a very attractive guy. He's tall and lanky, has some weird facial features, and big goofy hair. He is one of the funniest people I know, though. A lot of girls like him, but only because he was fun to be around, not because he was fun to be around AND sexually attractive. However, knowing more girls this way made him meet a great and pretty girl who was sexually attracted to him, and they've been together ever since.

 

So, being a fun person will only benefit you, even if you still might lose out to the traditionally hot guy sometimes.

[ltjg45]

You LET those people treat you in such a way. Regardless of how *I* feel about myself at any given time, I know that no one else has the right to treat me like ****, unless they want me to treat them in the same way or worse.

 

Actually, I don't let anyone treat me in any way that I deem inappropriate. I got a nasty temper and I have no problems releasing it on those who deserves it.

 

However, demanding common respect and dating is two totally different beasts.

 

As for "attracting women", I first have to find a decent one that I want to talk to. In my income range (which is unemployed to Burger King/McDonalds employees), there is almost no one decent enough that has morals.

 

Don't get me started on looks. I may not too attractive but some of these women make me feel handsome.

 

That's sad, which is crazy when I'm saying that.

[mn311601]

I'm not a comedian, if I have to rely on my ability to make a woman laugh, it's never going to happen.