Maybe you "ugly" guys can try this

[mesmerized]

Of course. Doesn't everybody want to be ugly?

 

I mean your looks are a choice, right? Oh wait....

 

To a degree it is actually. At least you can control your body and have a great body or get leaner and have a better more defined face. If you're unfortunate in the face area, there is always the opportunity to rock the body! But noooo, who wants to go to the gym? Let's go to LS and whine instead that our man boobs aren't sexually desired.

 

And well, unfortunately that is life for you. It's not fair...Some people get it all, some people don't. Sometimes you have to adjust your expectations accordingly, it's sad but it is what it is. The problem with some men is no matter how they look like, they think they're entitled to a gorgeous woman. Well you're not, really really not.

[ltjg45]

Have you seen the kind of guys women date? They don't even necessarily have one of those.

 

Yeah, I seen the males that women typically date that I tend to see often each day. It also helps kills my interest in approaching women too if those kinds of males is the ones they actually want.

 

And these are the women that apparently I should be going after.

 

The only things those males are capable of doing that I refuse to do is lie in any way, shape, or form concerning anything and letting the women find out the truth the hard way.

 

If I approach a female, I will say it exactly how I stand: I have no job, I live with my parents, and I absolutely hate it. I aim to change this ASAP and I refuse to accept this lifestyle. I will leave the rest in your court if you want to deal with this or not. If you don't, I fully understand and I won't waste another second of your life.

[mesmerized]

Yeah, I seen the males that women typically date that I tend to see often each day. It also helps kills my interest in approaching women too if those kinds of males is the ones they actually want.

 

And these are the women that apparently I should be going after.

 

The only things those males are capable of doing that I refuse to do is lie in any way, shape, or form concerning anything and letting the women find out the truth the hard way.

 

If I approach a female, I will say it exactly how I stand: I have no job, I live with my parents, and I absolutely hate it. I aim to change this ASAP and I refuse to accept this lifestyle. I will leave the rest in your court if you want to deal with this or not. If you don't, I fully understand and I won't waste another second of your life.

 

This is what women want to hear. Good for you for trying to get to a better position. Ambition is very attractive, in men and women. If I were you, I'd try to focus on my career right now. Dating will just lessen your focus on things that should matter the most to you now. Good luck with all that.

[Treasa]

Examples. No one ever said be either one of them. And God knows no rich or famous ever had to work for what they had. The bitter people on here are just getting uglier and uglier. It's so sad.

[ltjg45]

You don't need to tell them truths that are self-evident and you shouldn't lead with negativity.

 

However, I don't want them to think that I'm living a better life than I really am. That would make me a hypocrite which doesn't make the situation any better.

 

I feel bad enough admitting that I have lied in the past to protect my own interests from people too stubborn to see why I did that. I don't need to continue doing that.

[SJC2008]

When he's being himself, it's in the manner of his speech pattern, facial expression and body language. There's a hesitancy and awkwardness about him. When he mimics others, his body language is phenomenal.

 

Conan O'Brien is a good comparative in that the juxtaposition clearly illustrates their differences.

 

Another good comparative is David Letterman.

 

Both O'Brien and Letterman are verbal men, Letterman more so since O'Brien also relies on physicality. Krasinski is all about mimicking physicality where his verbal skills aren't great. The tempo of his speech is just a bit too quick and erratic. He's also not the best at banter and looks like hard work for both O'Brien and Letterman to draw out and ensure the audience is laughing and entertained. His body language doesn't engage with whomever he's speaking to. This is obvious with Letterman where Krasinski's sitting with his legs crossed, hips on the far side of his seat, nervously touching his tie and many other forms of twitching.

 

Cool...

 

I honestly wouldn't of noticed his body language as nervous or would of barely noticed it at all unless you said something. That makes sense though becasue it's pretty much a proven fact that women pick up body language better than men. I can read body language easy don't get me wrong, but as subtle as he was it's surprises me you got all that out of it. You'd sniff me out in a heart beat. If you think he's awkward youd probably run the other direction if you seen me...

[tbf]

Cool...

 

I honestly wouldn't of noticed his body language as nervous or would of barely noticed it at all unless you said something. That makes sense though becasue it's pretty much a proven fact that women pick up body language better than men. I can read body language easy don't get me wrong, but as subtle as he was it's surprises me you got all that out of it. You'd sniff me out in a heart beat. If you think he's awkward youd probably run the other direction if you seen me...

No idea whether I'd be able to read your body language. Bear in mind that Krasinski expresses himself through physicality so he's going to broadcast more than someone who's less physical.

 

Normally, I don't think of the why someone looks nervous, hesitant or awkward. They just do. But since you asked, it made me define the why in concrete terms.

[Revolver]

Women complain that men always say that they're going after "9's and 10's" when they have little to no dating success. But then those same women will say the reason men have little to no dating success is because they're going after "9's and 10's":laugh:

 

 

Hypocrisy is a funny thing

[hppr]

maybe I should lower my standards

 

The key is to improve your looks and attitude while at the same time being more open to girls that you normally wouldn't consider. For starters I try to not leave the house without dressing reasonably well and smelling good (ie, cologne). This puts you ahead of a fair amount of guys right off the bat. Second of all I try to be friendly and flirt/make conversation casually with girls wherever I go. Even when I'm technically taken I still do this, I think it is good policy to be friendly with everyone, everywhere.

 

Other thing is learning to pick up on visual queues that a girl likes you vs girls who don't like you. I'm not hardwired to see that sort of stuff like other guys are so for me it's a very involved process, hard to explain but once you get the hang of it you will learn it.

 

Now by girls you 'wouldn't normally consider' I don't mean women to which you are not attracted but women that you think you either don't have a shot with, or no I wouldn't date her she's got a kid, she's of a certain race/religion, really short or too tall, whatever.

 

In essence what you want to do is make yourself look more appealing and then really REALLY widen the net. That is the best way I can explain it.

[PogoStick]

I'm in a fairly bad time in life with plenty of things to make me less attractive. I'm straight up about it and I'm sure it hurts my options. That doesn't' stop me from dating, but I'm also optimistic about my future and know I'm moving in the right direction. If a woman wants to pass me up then it's her loss. I see myself like a rising stock and she might not be able to afford me later.

 

Besides all of that, I still have plenty of good qualities, and no one negative defines me. Then to top it off, every woman has her ***** too, so let's just call it even.

[FitChick]

I had a co-worker who married a very successful but ugly realtor eleven years younger. Try dating older women.

[Treasa]

Today in my class I had a guy who just recently acquired his PhD. Tall (probably 6'2" or 6'3"), "good-looking", probably what a lot of people would consider a 9 on the mythical scale, and friendly.

 

I didn't feel anything.

 

Now, the guy I passed in the hallway this morning, who was about 5'10", wearing a blue collar-type uniform, using a hand truck to transport reams of paper, wearing his hat backwards who flashed me a quick smile? Oh, yes, please.

[joystickd]

I do this and end up attracting married women and women in relationships and get BS from single women.

The messed up thing is I got good looks to go along with the things listed on here.

[jma500]

The only difference I am seeing is the guy who didn't pay particular attention to you in your mind you snubbed yet still noticed him, and are using it for some good old self-flattery as if replacing one superficiality with another makes you better than the rest.

 

You know what is truly attractive about a woman. Humility.

 

Humility is attractive in both sexes. When i speak to either men or women and they start going on about themselves and how great they are, i politely tune them out and walk away.

[Treasa]

The only difference I am seeing is the guy who didn't pay particular attention to you in your mind you snubbed yet still noticed him, and are using it for some good old self-flattery as if replacing one superficiality with another makes you better than the rest.

 

You know what is truly attractive about a woman. Humility.

 

Huh? Can you rephrase that? I'm not sure who snubbed me...

[Treasa]

The only difference I am seeing is the guy who didn't pay particular attention to you in your mind you snubbed yet still noticed him, and are using it for some good old self-flattery as if replacing one superficiality with another makes you better than the rest.

 

You know what is truly attractive about a woman. Humility.

 

Wow, I totally missed the last sentence. I must be getting tired.

 

I didn't even say anything about me in my post.

 

I'm the type that neither humbles nor praises myself in the company of others, but instead tries to make other people feel good about themselves.

 

I'm happy, and I like it when other people are happy, too.

 

I'm sorry you aren't happy.

 

ETA: Most of your posts are so negative. If you'd like to pick apart the well-meaning things I say to feel better, then go ahead. But you're only affecting yourself.

Edited May 15, 2013 by Treasa

[jma500]

Huh? Can you rephrase that? I'm not sure who snubbed me...

 

The poster thinks guy #1 snubbed you because while you mentioned guy #2 smiling at you there is no mention of flirting/interaction with guy #1.

[Els]

Treasa, hun, you're fighting for a lost cause that, more importantly, doesn't want help from you. They just want to whinge. Let them?

[jma500]

The poster thinks guy #1 snubbed you because while you mentioned guy #2 smiling at you there is no mention of flirting/interaction with guy #1.

 

Should read: thinks you snubbed guy #1 not thinks guy #1 snubbed you.

[PCS991]

Lip Sync-Off with John Krasinski - YouTube

 

I realize I have no hope of convincing you that most women are attracted to the following things:

 

1. Humor

2. Playful self-deprecation

3. Confidence

4. Laid-back-ed-...ness?

 

But I'm sure as hell gonna try anyway!

 

I'd jump all over either man, regardless of what he looked like. This is so freaking funny and hot.

 

That was a VERY funny video, I'd sleep with both of them

[ChessPieceFace]

That was a VERY funny video, I'd sleep with both of them

 

Good to know so many high-minded girls would give ugly, unsuccessful and poor guys like John K a chance.

[PCS991]

Good to know so many high-minded girls would give ugly, unsuccessful and poor guys like John K a chance.

 

LOL actually I'm a guy and my response to sleeping with them was my sense of humor at it's best...at 1am est.

[ScreamingTrees]

LOL actually I'm a guy and my response to sleeping with them was my sense of humor at it's best...at 1am est.

 

Same here, and I'd sleep with anybody in here. GIVE ME YOUR SAUSAGES

 

disclaimer: I turn gay when the moon is up.. like a gay werewolf or something

[Treasa]

Treasa, hun, you're fighting for a lost cause that, more importantly, doesn't want help from you. They just want to whinge. Let them?

 

Yeah, you're right. I can't stop someone from choosing to be pissy about life.

[jma500]

Yeah, you're right. I can't stop someone from choosing to be pissy about life.

They are not being pissy about life at least not in this thread. They are being pissy about your choice of examples. Most regular guys cannot equate themselves to famous actors, rock stars, etc. Regular guys see these famous/status men as so far above themselves in the mating hierarchy that there is no way they could compete. Thus when you tell regular guys to emulate famous/status men it leaves most scratching their heads and wondering what difference it could possibly make. Which lead most of the men here to post detracting statements. Of course you would date famous/status men. No shock there at all. It just leaves regular guys, especially those unsuccessful with women, with an even greater sense of futility.