waterwoman Posted May 11, 2013 Share Posted May 11, 2013 Oh Loredo, my lovely so sorry to hear your whole story. I agree with those who say to let the dust settle, take some time to clear your head. If your h has been your rock isn't it worth not turning your back entirely on the M for now. As to the cruel things your h said, they are wrong and unkind, but it's hard to hold in the pain sometimes after being betrayed - sounds like he tried to for ages and then when you broke NC he just couldn't. Not an excuse of course, but an explanation maybe. Be gentle with yourself, and him xxx 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Journee Posted May 11, 2013 Share Posted May 11, 2013 Find yourself......but don't throw the baby out with the bath water, KWIM? There is a lot to manage and deal with and overcome here....I understand. Do what ever it takes to feel good and whole and as pain free as possible.... When you have found yourself emotionally, and that may take some time under all your circumstances,THEN decide about your marriage and your future. It is normal to lump all the pain together and want to run away from it. Wait, please.....Until you can separate the physical pain from the emotional ones.... This really is golden advice. I know it can be tempting to just let go when everything goes haywire. Take some time to feel what you need to. Work through what you can. It's so painful to have someone refer to you as damaged goods. I am a survivor of rape and sexual abuse. I'm a wreck. I'm dismantled in some regard. I am hard to reach. Harder to love. I would be devastated if someone used that against me. I understand your hurt. It's like being taunted and reduced to an object. Your H was more than likely reaching for whatever he knew would hurt you because he was in so much pain. He finally came across his repressed anger and pain. I wish you both healing. You never know L. Maybe you two can help heal one another. You have one another in a world where most people will turn their backs and leave you in the cold. Why would you give that up without a fight? Without deep and long reflection? Thinking of you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
lilmisscantbewrong Posted May 11, 2013 Share Posted May 11, 2013 Don't give up loredo. Not yet. Link to post Share on other sites
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