xeson Posted September 26, 2004 Share Posted September 26, 2004 If cheating is having sex with someone else while you are married. What is a spouse that won't have sex with you? It's been well over two years and all I've gotten are empty promises and requests to rub their back (which I've done countless times). The last time we did it was April 2002, the time before that was July 4, 2001. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted September 26, 2004 Share Posted September 26, 2004 Originally posted by xeson If cheating is having sex with someone else while you are married. What is a spouse that won't have sex with you? It's been well over two years and all I've gotten are empty promises and requests to rub their back (which I've done countless times). The last time we did it was April 2002, the time before that was July 4, 2001. What are the reasons your spouse doesn't want to be intimate with you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author xeson Posted September 26, 2004 Author Share Posted September 26, 2004 Since I have spent many lonely nights on the couch I've thought about this quite a bit. Here's what I understand. Health - Poor health causes sexual desire to decrease or leave completely. It's God's way of keep the unhealthy from having and raising children. I've been to several funerals where the spouse hardly shed a tear. I think in some ways it was a relief to the living spouse. Homo-sexuality - A homosexual in a heterosexual marriage, sexually desires something they cannot have. Childhood Abuse - Abuse, especially childhood abuse, makes it difficult at best for that person to trust another human being. Previous sexual partners - Sex in it's fullness requires giving oneself completely to another. This is impossible if you have sexual relations with someone other than your spouse. Giving one's self as a virgin in marriage is good, but much better is a spouse who is faithful for life. Trust is one of the worst things you can lose in a marriage relationship. Anger/Hate/Forgiveness - Forgiveness is the key to any loving relationship. In marriage someone that has difficulty with anger or hate, has real trouble letting go and forgiving. They will use sex as a weapon, to withhold or punish. Ultimately you cannot love sexually if you harbor bitterness, anger, rage, and hold un-forgiveness. My spouse, has trouble with each of these. Link to post Share on other sites
Ladyjane14 Posted September 26, 2004 Share Posted September 26, 2004 Xeson, I think what Merin wants to know is what are the reasons that your wife has given you for not wanting sex? It looks like you are posting what YOU think her reasons are, but what did she say? You're going to have to give alittle more detail if you want to solicite opinions. Two years is a long time. Surely SHE must have said something. Post again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author xeson Posted September 26, 2004 Author Share Posted September 26, 2004 I didn't make these up. I got them from my spouse. After time I accepted them as valid and true. Link to post Share on other sites
Karlise13 Posted September 26, 2004 Share Posted September 26, 2004 physical and emotional neglect. Link to post Share on other sites
re3rocks Posted September 26, 2004 Share Posted September 26, 2004 just be like "hey baby, i luv u and thats forever. u can trust me baby" and take him in slow. thats what my friend girls say they do. wow they are pimps when i think of it (im a straight man by the way) Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted September 27, 2004 Share Posted September 27, 2004 Originally posted by xeson I didn't make these up. I got them from my spouse. After time I accepted them as valid and true. Xeson, If your spouse has all of these issues, and you believe them to be valid then you need to insist that he/she get some professional help not only for the two of you, but for them personally. Link to post Share on other sites
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