Start of NC

[aisuru]

You make me want to stick my dick in an electrical socket.

 

Therefore, I am positive that Andrew was banging hookers, hoping he got AIDS, quickly die and end this misery.

 

OMG... !!!

 

 

I shouldn't laugh. I will not laugh. I cannot laugh.

 

More vodka please.

 

Leigh, honestly, this is all very sad watching from the outside. Very very very sad. I wish you would really hear us out. We mean well.

[Mme. Chaucer]

I just mean to say that, I have a good life and therefore I cannot understand why I would be crying every night after MONTHS of NC.

 

Well, you don't even have one DAY of NC.

 

My good friend moved on after 3 months, enough to stop crying about her ex, and she soon moved on to her husband. Her ex left her for another women after 15years together.

I prefer to look to her as a role model, albeit I will not move onto another life partner at her speed! I just plan to at least be not... crying regularly after 3 months of NC, and to also have moved on to guys who I have casual fun with, until I find love again one day.

 

Well, all this nonstop blathering about what andrew feels, hugging in bed, what you are going to feel like in a week / month / year, etc. is all just a big smokescreen. You are throwing out a bunch of shyte to help you avoid feeling any of your feelings about this.

 

Do you notice how many times you mention "revisit a relationship with me," "until we are back together," and stuff like that? You are not living in the reality that your relationship is over now.

 

You don't need to be bawling; I applaud the way you are talking like you are already moving on. Problem is, the WAY you're talking makes it painfully (literally, PAINFUL to observe) obvious that you are being completely dishonest with yourself right now.

 

There is a way to walk through your feelings without being in denial or turning to unhealthy "self controlling" behaviors like your eating disorder was. I feel strongly that you need professional help to learn this. You really need to do that.

[Leigh 87]

I have intuition, too. My radar is pinging at a deafening rate at the moment.

 

Most people need to adore someone to have a LTR with. I can't hate someone and date them. That is just simple logic.

 

 

 

 

Exactly. Look, I know the guy is crazy about ME, Leigh, as a person. He did adore me.

 

I honestly do not think his ability to bang hookers will ever shut off if he suddenly meets a girl he loves "enough".

 

He was not really strongly pining for the hookers. It was just something we thought was harmless since he was young and there was no kissing or pleasing them involved.

 

To him they were just a human sex toy.

 

He was crazy about his ex too, trust me I know.... And yet he did it once to her too.

 

Andrew does not switch off his meaningless sex with hooker botton just because he loves a girl.

 

He is not the monster people paint him as, though. He was not phased about hookers on the whole, and only asked to do it a couple of times in years.

 

I thought it was a good idea because he was very immature when we met, in terms of relationships. I did not feel he was ready to settle down for life with one person, with one body.

 

After I suggested the hookers and he did it a couple of times, it really did not seem like a big thing in our relationship. I still trusted him 100% when he went out to clubs. He would end up calling me to talk anyway when he went out.

 

Sorry but do not believe he had eyes for other women in general, and having meaningless sex with a hooker or do does not make me feel like he was a sleezy cheat.

[aisuru]

But you guuuuuuys, he only had sex with hookers 3 times in 3 years. Honest.

 

Honestly, this explains why she's now looking for casual sex. She's trying to show him she can also have casual sex and therefore, motivate him to break NC and be with her. She'll then overlook the sex with hookers three times every three years.

 

This is just so sad.

 

I do not understand how a person can feel this low about themselves to feel this is okay.

[Sheilalou008]

I can't even get started on the hookers aspect of this.

 

I would NEVER think this is ok in any way, shape or form. Men who are in love and adore us do not want to have sex with anyone else but who they love. Period.

 

Yes, this is my very black and white view on things. I have many gray areas in my thinking but this doesn't fall into what-so-ever.

[TaraMaiden]

And do you adore him? Worship the ground he walks on?

Did you love him as much as you keep insisting he adored you?

 

Did you dedicate as much into the relationship as you seem to insist he did??

[aisuru]

Exactly. Look, I know the guy is crazy about ME, Leigh, as a person. He did adore me.

 

I honestly do not think his ability to bang hookers will ever shut off if he suddenly meets a girl he loves "enough".

 

He was not really strongly pining for the hookers. It was just something we thought was harmless since he was young and there was no kissing or pleasing them involved.

 

To him they were just a human sex toy.

 

He was crazy about his ex too, trust me I know.... And yet he did it once to her too.

 

Andrew does not switch off his meaningless sex with hooker botton just because he loves a girl.

 

He is not the monster people paint him as, though. He was not phased about hookers on the whole, and only asked to do it a couple of times in years.

 

I thought it was a good idea because he was very immature when we met, in terms of relationships. I did not feel he was ready to settle down for life with one person, with one body.

 

After I suggested the hookers and he did it a couple of times, it really did not seem like a big thing in our relationship. I still trusted him 100% when he went out to clubs. He would end up calling me to talk anyway when he went out.

 

Sorry but do not believe he had eyes for other women in general, and having meaningless sex with a hooker or do does not make me feel like he was a sleezy cheat.

 

STOP. JUST STOP.

 

You're justifying his actions for why he provided you with less than you deserve.

 

STOP IT.

 

Why can you not see this?

 

What happened to you in life to make you believe this is okay?

[Sheilalou008]

Exactly. Look, I know the guy is crazy about ME, Leigh, as a person. He did adore me.

 

I honestly do not think his ability to bang hookers will ever shut off if he suddenly meets a girl he loves "enough".

 

He was not really strongly pining for the hookers. It was just something we thought was harmless since he was young and there was no kissing or pleasing them involved.

 

To him they were just a human sex toy.

 

He was crazy about his ex too, trust me I know.... And yet he did it once to her too.

 

Andrew does not switch off his meaningless sex with hooker botton just because he loves a girl.

 

He is not the monster people paint him as, though. He was not phased about hookers on the whole, and only asked to do it a couple of times in years.

 

I thought it was a good idea because he was very immature when we met, in terms of relationships. I did not feel he was ready to settle down for life with one person, with one body.

 

After I suggested the hookers and he did it a couple of times, it really did not seem like a big thing in our relationship. I still trusted him 100% when he went out to clubs. He would end up calling me to talk anyway when he went out.

 

Sorry but do not believe he had eyes for other women in general, and having meaningless sex with a hooker or do does not make me feel like he was a sleezy cheat.

 

Yes, he will. It will take growing up on his part but there will be a time when one woman is enough for him. I have known some of the biggest players in my life who changed when they matured beyond "a human sex toy or warm hole to stick it in."

 

I cannot believe that I am even having this argument!

[Mme. Chaucer]

It would aid this discussion if the terms, "crazy about me," "adored me," "madly in love with me," and "wants me badly" were banned from it heretofore.

[Leigh 87]

He honestly did not think he disrespected me.

 

And you didn't think he disrespected you either, because you accepted the behaviour and have stated, will take him back if he 'begs' you to.

 

I'm quite sure he 'honestly' knew he'd disrespected you - and then he realised he's hit the jackpot when he met a woman dumb enough to agree to the opposite.

 

You're perfect for each other.

 

Whatever man. I have a good life ahead of me thanks. You don't know me and cannot determine what I am some hopeless drop kick with no prospects or reasons to be happy

 

I'm not dumb. Not intellectually and nor am I with people. I DO NOT ASSOCIATE with people who do not think I am awesome. I have plenty I enjoy doing ALONE, so not NEED to be around people who disrespect me.

 

I needed him to show me love on a DAILY basis. The way he acted DAILY showed me how much he did adore me, as a person.

 

ANDREW is the one with the problem with hookers. He needs to take a look in the mirror and figure out why he can do that to any women that he falls in love with.

 

Look, I had a feeling we would not last due to our inexperience with relationships. The LOVE was genuinely there.

 

I think he must have a problem with respecting women. He only ever slept with hookers before me and one or two other girls.

 

Can you see why I am happy about my future prospects with men now? I did not doubt his love for ME due to the hookers, rather; I thought he was pretty flawed on some level for thinking it was an OKAY thing to do.

 

I think he actually has issues he needs to work on himself. No women will put up with the sh8t I did.

 

I DID NOT put up with a half baked relationship the way some women do where the guy does not show DAILY how in love they are with their girlfriend....

 

Him fcking two hookers is messed up I agree, but I do not agree that he did it because he did not love and adore me on a daily basis.

 

Andrew loved me the ONLY WAY he knew how to love.

 

Looks like he actually needs to accept that HE has issues to.

[Sheilalou008]

But you guuuuuuys, he only had sex with hookers 3 times in 3 years. Honest.

 

Honestly, this explains why she's now looking for casual sex. She's trying to show him she can also have casual sex and therefore, motivate him to break NC and be with her. She'll then overlook the sex with hookers three times every three years.

 

This is just so sad.

 

I do not understand how a person can feel this low about themselves to feel this is okay.

 

My Lord. This is just beyond anything I can wrap my head around. It is not ok to sleep with hookers every once in a while cus he enjoys another hole to go balls deep in. Ugh.

[aisuru]

Yes, he will. It will take growing up on his part but there will be a time when one woman is enough for him. I have known some of the biggest players in my life who changed when they matured beyond "a human sex toy or warm hole to stick it in."

 

I cannot believe that I am even having this argument!

 

He wants her badly. We know. No need to repeat it.

[Leigh 87]

Answer my phukking question, dammit!!

 

 

 

 

I feel we loved each other mutually.

 

I think it caused him issues with respect, in a relationship; the fact he slept with mostly hookers instead of non hookers.

 

I believe we both loved each other equally. I did not feel the need for meaningless sex and the need for a new body to experience in the way he did though.

[Sheilalou008]

Whatever man. I have a good life ahead of me thanks. You don't know me and cannot determine what I am some hopeless drop kick with no prospects or reasons to be happy

 

I'm not dumb. Not intellectually and nor am I with people. I DO NOT ASSOCIATE with people who do not think I am awesome. I have plenty I enjoy doing ALONE, so not NEED to be around people who disrespect me.

 

I needed him to show me love on a DAILY basis. The way he acted DAILY showed me how much he did adore me, as a person.

 

ANDREW is the one with the problem with hookers. He needs to take a look in the mirror and figure out why he can do that to any women that he falls in love with.

 

Look, I had a feeling we would not last due to our inexperience with relationships. The LOVE was genuinely there.

 

I think he must have a problem with respecting women. He only ever slept with hookers before me and one or two other girls.

 

Can you see why I am happy about my future prospects with men now? I did not doubt his love for ME due to the hookers, rather; I thought he was pretty flawed on some level for thinking it was an OKAY thing to do.

 

I think he actually has issues he needs to work on himself. No women will put up with the sh8t I did.

 

I DID NOT put up with a half baked relationship the way some women do where the guy does not show DAILY how in love they are with their girlfriend....

 

Him fcking two hookers is messed up I agree, but I do not agree that he did it because he did not love and adore me on a daily basis.

 

Andrew loved me the ONLY WAY he knew how to love.

 

Looks like he actually needs to accept that HE has issues to.

 

Ok, this is ridiculous. Shows you love every day? Was the man not allowed to have a bad day or was it always about you and your feelings? No wonder he left, you expected so much from him.

 

Here is a good question. Did you show him love every single day no matter what? I highly doubt it. I have read pretty much all of your old threads and it sounds like you put way too much pressure on him with your hysterics and constant jealousy and drama. You talk in circles about how much he loved and adored you but very little about how you felt about him.

 

 

 

Um, you don't tolerate people who don't think you are awesome? Some of my best friends know I am a mess at times and call me on it. I am far from awesome on a daily basis...sometimes I am an a$shole, actually.

[aisuru]

Whatever man. I have a good life ahead of me thanks. You don't know me and cannot determine what I am some hopeless drop kick with no prospects or reasons to be happy

 

I'm not dumb. Not intellectually and nor am I with people. I DO NOT ASSOCIATE with people who do not think I am awesome. I have plenty I enjoy doing ALONE, so not NEED to be around people who disrespect me.

 

I needed him to show me love on a DAILY basis. The way he acted DAILY showed me how much he did adore me, as a person.

 

ANDREW is the one with the problem with hookers. He needs to take a look in the mirror and figure out why he can do that to any women that he falls in love with.

 

Look, I had a feeling we would not last due to our inexperience with relationships. The LOVE was genuinely there.

 

I think he must have a problem with respecting women. He only ever slept with hookers before me and one or two other girls.

 

Can you see why I am happy about my future prospects with men now? I did not doubt his love for ME due to the hookers, rather; I thought he was pretty flawed on some level for thinking it was an OKAY thing to do.

 

I think he actually has issues he needs to work on himself. No women will put up with the sh8t I did.

 

I DID NOT put up with a half baked relationship the way some women do where the guy does not show DAILY how in love they are with their girlfriend....

 

Him fcking two hookers is messed up I agree, but I do not agree that he did it because he did not love and adore me on a daily basis.

 

Andrew loved me the ONLY WAY he knew how to love.

 

Looks like he actually needs to accept that HE has issues to.

 

The very second I find out my boyfriend slept with another woman, for money, alcohol, or nothing, I'M OUT.

 

I won't put up with a "half baked relationships."

 

JUST NO.

 

Stop making excuses for this guy and stop making excuses for why you stayed with him. Just own it. And. Move. On.

[aisuru]

I feel we loved each other mutually.

 

I think it caused him issues with respect, in a relationship; the fact he slept with mostly hookers instead of non hookers.

 

I believe we both loved each other equally. I did not feel the need for meaningless sex and the need for a new body to experience in the way he did though.

 

So sleeping with non hookers would have been more acceptable? I need a whiplash smiley stat.

[aisuru]

"I needed him to show me love on a DAILY basis."

 

And what defines daily love-showing for you? I'd love to hear the answer to this one...

 

 

 

Cuddling on the couch while watching 'The Notebook' and then going to bed while he provides her some sexual relief and she provides him none. Cause blow jobs are icky.

[Sheilalou008]

He wants her badly. We know. No need to repeat it.

 

There will be many more before this thread dies a slow and painful death.

 

I cannot believe she thinks that we buy any of this.

[TaraMaiden]

I feel we loved each other mutually.

 

I think it caused him issues with respect, in a relationship; the fact he slept with mostly hookers instead of non hookers.

 

I believe we both loved each other equally. I did not feel the need for meaningless sex and the need for a new body to experience in the way he did though.

 

THIS does not answer my question.

 

You stated that in a relationship, a man has to worship the ground you walk on...

 

You keep insisting Andrew loved you to the ends of the earth.

Did you or did you not love him in the way you expected, wanted and stated he loved you?

[Sheilalou008]

Don't forget she also had a threesome for him a time or two.

 

I...just...can't.

 

Instead of gas, can I use Jameson to douse myself in to catch a buzz before I burn my eyes out of my head?

[aisuru]

There will be many more before this thread dies a slow and painful death.

 

I cannot believe she thinks that we buy any of this.

 

 

Need more vodka please.

[Sheilalou008]

Cuddling on the couch while watching 'The Notebook' and then going to bed while he provides her some sexual relief and she provides him none. Cause blow jobs are icky.

 

Blow jobs are gross but hookers are a-ok?

[aisuru]

Blow jobs are gross but hookers are a-ok?

 

That's what the hookers are for. They do the dirty work.

[Sheilalou008]

Need more vodka please.

 

I am dead sober. Poor me!

[Leigh 87]

My Lord. This is just beyond anything I can wrap my head around. It is not ok to sleep with hookers every once in a while cus he enjoys another hole to go balls deep in. Ugh.

 

 

 

Look, you really have to stop thinking you can read my mind.

 

I deserve nothing less than a guy who is totally crazy about me and loves me deeply.

 

Andrews DAILY actions towards me showed that he adored and did indeed love me. Otherwise, I would not have been happy to be with him.

 

I personally believe that a man can be deeply in love and be able to have meaningless sex with hookers.

 

Sorry, but I do not believe you when you claim to know how ALL men in love feel.

 

And it was not some excessive hooker use that replaced being intimate with me.

 

EVERY ONE who knows him think it is just him, and he will NEVER lose his ability to use a hooker no matter HOW in love he is.

 

He may find a women he loves deeper than he loved me, but not easily. I believe he loved me a great deal and still does.

 

I do not believe all men are 100% monogamous in nature, irrespective of HOW in love they are.

 

I have read too many studies, researched it extensively enough, and just intellectually believe that a man in love is capable of using a hooker or two.

 

It would only have perturbed me if Andrew felt a need to do it, in order to BE HAPPY with me.

 

My instinct and gut feelings told me that he would have been happy enough with me to forgo the hookers.