How to handle situation?

[Jen]

I have this neighbor who has only been here for less than a year, doesn't know many people, is married with children, but it is clear he would like to have some extra fun with me.

 

I don't find him very intelligent or interesting as a person, but sometimes he makes me laugh, and I imagine it might be fun just to play with him one time because I know I could never get attached to him.

 

He calls me from a phone booth just about every evening and the last time we got talking jokingly about sex. It appears that he has had a few affairs, but the funny thing is that he thinks the woman should do everything (sexually) and he should just lie there and "enjoy" things. I told him in our culture (he comes from the far East) that the man is supposed to equally please the woman (orally) just like she should do it for the man, but he told me he only likes it when the woman does it to him.

 

Then I told him I didn't think it would be very interesting for us to "try" things out because our ideas are not the same. He tried to convince me to come over and just "try" him out, if I didn't like it to just leave, but I said I couldn't just come over and do that! It would be ridiculous and embarassing.

 

What would you suggest I do? It is true that I need a good

 

f---, and THAT'S ALL I want. No feelings, no sentiments, just THAT! but I don't even think he could be fulfilling unless he is endowed in other areas.....

[Tony T]

The man is your neighbor, married with children, you do not find him intelligent or interesting as a person and you do not feel he will be that great as a sexual partner. You basically told him he would not be interesting as a sexual partner, according to your post.

 

Had the thought ever occurred to you that you might just find a nice, available, unmarried male...someone who may be much more to your liking sexually...to have sex with. Sex happens mostly in the mind. If you enter into an encounter with so many obstacles, I don't think the mind is going to cooperate so readily

 

I mean, if this guy was really hot to you...then, hell, screw with his marriage and your reputation in the neighborhood. But you see this guy as mostly a dud. His marriage may be all he has going for him. Give him a break...and give yourself one too.

 

Are you open to all men who express an interest in having fun with you? I'll bet you are pretty popular in your town.

[sparkle]

Any married man that's flirted with me has been a JERK. I never have and never will give a married man a second of my time. No matter how attractive he was or how much he made me laugh. Actually, our conversation would never get to the point of him flirting with me and making me laugh. And never would it get as far as allowing him to call me every night.

 

I don't mean to be rude, but females that give in to these MARRIED men's advances are at the same (low) level as these men.

 

Think about his family--his wife, his kids. I believe that what goes around comes around. Think how you'll feel one day when you're married with kids, and your husband gets it on with some chick who's willing.

 

If all you "need is a good F---", call up a male escort. A friend of mine is an escort, he specializes in that kind of thing.

[Jen]

I live in a huge suburban area of the city where most of the neighbors are strangers, so there is nothing at stake with a reputation here. This is a cosmopolitan city where people don't really care who is "screwing" who and I don't even notice or care myself.

 

I guess I just need you know what, and this person is the closest at the moment..

[Jen]

I don't mean to be rude, but females that give in to these MARRIED men's advances are at the same (low) level as these men.

 

I know what you mean, and agree that I am just as "low" as a married man, but I'd rather do it with a married man because he won't become attached to me, whereas if I get involved with a single guy, I risk hurting him.

Think about his family--his wife, his kids. I believe that what goes around comes around. Think how you'll feel one day when you're married with kids, and your husband gets it on with some chick who's willing.

 

I think his wife already knows and accepts that he does this as it is accepted in their culture. The most important thing for her (I think) is that she have a father there for the children. If I'm married with kids I'll understand if my husband needs a change once in a while.

If all you "need is a good F---", call up a male escort. A friend of mine is an escort, he specializes in that kind of thing.

 

Nice thought but I have a free opportunity here, and don't need to spend money on that kind of thing when I can get it for nothing.

[Tony T]

YOU WRITE: "I have a free opportunity here, and don't need to spend money on that kind of thing when I can get it for nothing."

 

So if you already knew what you wanted to do, why did you post here? What were you looking for?

 

In my opinion, this guy comes from a pretty slutty culture. And the fact that you like to screw married men makes me hope and pray there aren't a lot of ladies like you around to make life a living hell for many families. I'm glad I don't live in your trailer park.

[Jen]

So if you already knew what you wanted to do, why did you post here? What were you looking for?

 

I didn't say I was going to do it with him, I made some general clarifications that's all.

In my opinion, this guy comes from a pretty slutty culture. And the fact that you like to screw married men makes me hope and pray there aren't a lot of ladies like you around to make life a living hell for many families.

 

Hey, it takes TWO to tango.

 

I'm glad I don't live in your trailer park.

 

Actually, I live in a big house.

[Vikki]

I think you should screw him. You deserve each other. You both have no self respect whatsoever. If that's all you can score and feel worthy of then do it, you'll feel so much better about yourself. Totally loved and fulfilled, especially when you do all the work and get nothing in return.