knopfler1 Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 I will date for the third time the new girl on saturday. Is it time to make a move and kiss her or should I try holding her hand on this date?. thanks 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sarahkm Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 Do what feels right. If you feel like a good night kiss, go for it. But I think definitely at least hold her hand when you're walking down the street or something. It's sweet and doesn't come on too strong, especially after 3 dates. It'll let her know you like her too, in case she is having doubts about how you feel. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted May 29, 2013 Author Share Posted May 29, 2013 Well the girl asked me to go this weekend to the auto cinema, is this a good signal?. Should I kiss her this time? Link to post Share on other sites
Phantom888 Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 Yes by third date you should always kiss. For those of us who are "older" (35+) the 3rd date often involves sex. But don't rush it. As stated above, do what feels natural. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Jane2011 Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 Do what feels right. If you feel like a good night kiss, go for it. But I think definitely at least hold her hand when you're walking down the street or something. It's sweet and doesn't come on too strong, especially after 3 dates. It'll let her know you like her too, in case she is having doubts about how you feel. I agree with this. At the very least, attempt a hand-hold. Not all women are the same, of course, but I know for me, if a guy I was on a third date with didn't at that point try to touch me in some way (innocent, I mean), I'd feel a bit frustrated. In fact, that was my experience with my current boyfriend, and I was frustrated (but not to the point that I didn't want to see him anymore). I just thought...'damn, he's never going to make a move, Ima need to get drunk on our next date.' He did make a move on our fourth date, though. So it was all good. But prior to that after the third date, even with me knowing he liked me, I still thought..."he doesn't like me." Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted May 29, 2013 Author Share Posted May 29, 2013 So, when we are in the car would it be more appropriate to hold her hand first instead of kissing her?. Or should I try both? Link to post Share on other sites
Jane2011 Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 So, when we are in the car would it be more appropriate to hold her hand first instead of kissing her?. Or should I try both? I feel like you have to ease into it just a little. I'd hold her hand first. That usually puts you in this sort of physically close mode for a little while. Kissing will happen naturally after that (most of the time). I don't know exactly what scenario you're talking about. Driving in the car or parked in the car, or what. But...the way it usually happens is you do light touching first. Like, if you're just sitting in the car (I don't know how likely that is, but some situations are like that), just sort of put your hand/arms near hers, touch hers as if in an affectionate/romantic/innocent way. This will give way to taking her hand in yours and holding it, which will then give way to more bodily closeness, which will then give way to more face/head closeness, which will then give way to more mouth/lips closeness.... Before you know it, your lips have touched! Actually, just do what you want, but don't make abrupt/random/brusque moves. Be smooth about it. If she's on a third date with you, she probably likes you, so there's no reason to be overly nervous. Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted May 29, 2013 Author Share Posted May 29, 2013 I was thinking in holding hands with her when the car is parked while we are see in the movie Link to post Share on other sites
Jane2011 Posted May 29, 2013 Share Posted May 29, 2013 That sounds good. Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted May 29, 2013 Author Share Posted May 29, 2013 I was thinking in holding hands with her when the car is parked while we are seeing the movie. This will be my fourth date with her Link to post Share on other sites
Cutiepie1976 Posted May 30, 2013 Share Posted May 30, 2013 Sounds like a drive-in movie? Logistically, attempting a first kiss in a car can be a quite challenging, especially if you're inexperienced. There's the cupholder get-up and center console separating the two seats, etc. Can you go for a short walk before or after the movie? You can touch her playfully on the arm as you joke and chat during the walk. Hold her hand a little later if that goes well, and finally attempt a kiss, maybe when you open her car door after your little walk. Link to post Share on other sites
Phantom888 Posted May 30, 2013 Share Posted May 30, 2013 Touch her during dinner....rub her hands, or play with her fingers. Just some contact to show you are interested. Touch her back when you enter or exit a door.... just warm her up with touching. By the time the night is over, she will be ready for a nice kiss. This has been my experience, and I think I'm right. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted June 2, 2013 Author Share Posted June 2, 2013 Well, yesterday we were in the drive in theater and i holder hands with her most of the movie, then I have to pickup my cellphone and I removed my hand from hers and she holder my hand again, then I decided to kiss her so I decided to kiss her by surprise, I got close to her and I kissed her mouth softly for 3 seconds and she told me: thats so cute. At the end when I brought her home she said goodby and she kissed me between my cheek and my mouth and hugged me. So what do you think about this?, are these good signs from her? Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted June 5, 2013 Author Share Posted June 5, 2013 She started acting very distant after holding hands with her and giving her the kiss, she stopped sending me messages and today I just told her what was going on. I told her that i wanted to apologize with her if the kiss made her feel uncomfortable and she just answered this: It didn't made me feel uncomfortable but there is no chemistry between us. I don't know what the hell happened, but i just deleted her from my phone, this is over. i don't know what happened, all the week we spoke a lot throughout whatsapp and she was the one who wanted to go to the drive in theater and why the hell when I hold hands with her and when I kiss her she starts acting weird and cold and today she just said: there is no chemistry between us Link to post Share on other sites
Phantom888 Posted June 6, 2013 Share Posted June 6, 2013 Chemistry is a very complicated thing, and you usually don't know if you have sparks with someone until you get really close to them (i.e. kiss). You can be totally attracted to this person, and for some reason if the smell, taste, feeling isn't right during a kiss, then there is no chemistry. It's hard to explain, but very real. You didn't do anything wrong. She just didn't feel it. Happens to all of us from time to time. Move on... It was a good learning experience, and you had fun at the movies right? Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted June 6, 2013 Author Share Posted June 6, 2013 do you think that she thought that we had no chemistry when I kissed her? Link to post Share on other sites
Phantom888 Posted June 6, 2013 Share Posted June 6, 2013 Well there's no way anyone would know except her. How was she reacting during the movie? How receptive was she of the kiss? Be more attentive and aware of signs, because chemistry works both ways. If she doesn't feel chemistry at any time during the date, there are very obvious signals. Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted June 6, 2013 Author Share Posted June 6, 2013 I am very confused. I holded hands with her most of the movie and she was comfortable with that, then I had to pickup my cellphone and I removed my hand from hers and she holder my hand again, then I decided to kiss her so I decided to kiss her by surprise, I got close to her and I kissed her mouth softly for 3 seconds and she told me: Thats cute. I don't know what the hell happened Link to post Share on other sites
Lani Posted June 6, 2013 Share Posted June 6, 2013 Don't try and figure out what happened. That's the thing with chemistry, it's either there or it isn't. She obviously isn't feeling it and she won't be able to explain why. I know it's difficult, but you just need to let this one go. Link to post Share on other sites
Cutiepie1976 Posted June 6, 2013 Share Posted June 6, 2013 do you think that she thought that we had no chemistry when I kissed her? Often this is the case. The first kiss can be very clarifying for a woman in determining whether she feels chemistry with you or not. After you stopped holding her hand, she held yours. So, she seemed to like and want that. After you kissed her on the lips during the date, she opted for a cheek, not a mouth, kiss at the end of the date. She is the only person who can tell you for certain what happened. But given her choice, perhaps she felt no chemistry with the lip kiss. It happens. You'll find someone else to date. Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted June 6, 2013 Author Share Posted June 6, 2013 But do you think it was the way I kissed her?, I just got close to her and kissed her in the lips for like two seconds and then she said: oh that is cute Link to post Share on other sites
Lani Posted June 6, 2013 Share Posted June 6, 2013 But do you think it was the way I kissed her?, I just got close to her and kissed her in the lips for like two seconds and then she said: oh that is cute It wasn't the way you kissed her. It's about how she felt, which was obviously not much at all. It's not your fault, if you're going to feel it you feel it. It's just not there for her. You did nothing wrong. And you can't do anything about it now. Link to post Share on other sites
Author knopfler1 Posted June 6, 2013 Author Share Posted June 6, 2013 you are very right, I did nothing wrong. She just didn't felt comfortable with me. I have nothing to blame to myself Link to post Share on other sites
Lani Posted June 6, 2013 Share Posted June 6, 2013 you are very right, I did nothing wrong. She just didn't felt comfortable with me. I have nothing to blame to myself Correct. One day you will be in the same position and you'll understand it more. Just chalk this one up to experience, and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Jon Tenzo Posted June 6, 2013 Share Posted June 6, 2013 You will get better at gauging this with time. The goal is to know before you even decide to make a move. Link to post Share on other sites
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